


The Skin I Live In

by capnvanillawithsprinkles, Xevn



Series: Learning to Live, Not Just Survive [1]
Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: All the tags? I am terrible at tagging things., Alpha Lexa, Alpha/omega Clark, Alternate Universe - Gender Changes, Bad to good story line, Consensual Sex, Dubious Consent Due To Identity Issues, Dubious Ethics, Dubious Morality, Dubious Science, Dubious genderswap, F/F, G!p Lexa, Gender Dysphoria, Genderswap, Girl Penis Lexa, Hate, IDK suggestions for tags open to anything, Implied Self-Harm, Kidnapping, Male to female Clark, Non-Traditional Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Other, Science Experiments, Suggested self-harm, Transgender, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-28
Updated: 2018-02-04
Packaged: 2019-02-07 21:08:03
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 22
Words: 51,741
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12849552
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/capnvanillawithsprinkles/pseuds/capnvanillawithsprinkles, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Xevn/pseuds/Xevn
Summary: What would happen if a strong alpha male like Clark Griffin were kidnapped by an angry, vengeful woman? In the corporate world, Dr. Lexa Woods was a force to be reckoned. But unlike most other alphas, she is what she appears to be. ABO dynamics.I should also mention that this story was partially inspired by the movie The Skin I Live In by Pedro Almodovar. If you have seen any of his movies you should know that this means the story may have sweet elements but ultimately it is rather dark.





	1. Regrets, I Have a Few

**Author's Note:**

> My sincerest apologies. I behaved badly with allowing the comments section grown verses being better. I have no excuse for fighting back when the better part of me knows the correct solution is to fix the problem. I never wanted to offend anyone. I was attack and I threw back. I have corrected the tags for the most part, but if anyone sees a tag missing please help me. I am still new to being a writer on this site. I try hard to place tags and in a rush I didn't ensure this work was properly tagged. Never in my mind was this story meant to hurt anyone or the characters that were created. I honestly wish no ill-will onto anyone. I was ignorant for never know lesbophic was a thing or that changing a gender would cause this kind of backlash. I went straight to defending myself and people that I have never met instead of being understanding. You all deserve better. I deleted everything in the comments to start fresh but if you want to talk and actually talk I will leave my email here. I refuse to be one of the people that makes this world unbearable and I truly am sorry for hurting anyone. I don't know how to fix the pain I have inflected but for all of those I wronged please message me. Xevn87@gmail.com. please tell me how to do better and avoid this from ever happening again.

Consciousness leaked into his system like confetti falling at the New Year’s celebration in Times Square.  Piece by piece the unfamiliar surroundings made sense. Confounded blue eyes blearily searched the stark white walls for some insight into his location.

  
  


Waking in unfamiliar beds, though not uncommon for Clark, had recently become unappealing. Untenable. He squeezed his eyes closed and drew oxygen deep into his lungs in an attempt to shake the weighty lethargy holding him down. Pushing up onto his elbows and past the wave of nausea, he managed to sit upright. His right hand rubbed his stubbled cheek as he had done hundreds of mornings before. But, unlike the other times, a blinding pain electrified his face. He glanced around the room and found a mirror on the far wall.For month Clark had avoided his own reflection, but the bandages on his face forced the issue. He used the roller clamp to stop his IV line before disengaging from the bag. He hoisted himself onto his unsteady feet, shuffling toward the unfamiliar visage. 

  
  


Shaggy blonde hair fell across his forehead as his eyes studied the clean bandaging covering the lower portion of his face. Fingertips brushed back blonde tendrils. ‘When did I lose my health?’ Weak eyes examining the thin skin covering greying skin and sunken cheeks.’Fear bit into him as memories floated to the surface. 

  
  


_ “Please tell me you aren’t one of those needy bitches that expects this to be more than a one-night thing.” Clark’s cold words silenced the beautiful omega. ‘Shit, I bit another one.’ Scratching his fingernails along the stubble of his cheek regret for his harshness and foolish decisions ignited then quickly faded. ‘My reputation should have been enough to keep her away.’ _

  
  


_ “Look.” The tiny brunette curled into a fetal position. Rejection had ravaged through her quickly.  _

  
  


_ “I’m not the alpha for you. Nobody with any sense would want me. Damaged goods. Ask around. Seriously. I don’t remember the last time I slept alone. I can’t tell you the last time I slept at home. Here. Take this card.” The reverence in his action dispelled any doubt of his intentions. _

  
  


_ A pale hand curled around its edges. Clark ignored the way the mascara-stained teary streaks marred her face. Guilt should have itched at his soul, but that had died a long time ago. “She’ll take care of the marks. My alpha’s too strong for me. When my alpha believes he has found his true mate, there is nothing else. But, then I destroy gorgeous creatures like you. When I am sober, I realize that my alpha is vile and warped. He’s dangerous. So. Call Raven. She hates me, but she’ll fix you.” _

  
  


_ “Like she did the last time? No thank you.”  As if a switch was flicked on in the brunette’s mind, her features hardened into a calculated emotionless mask.  Registering the confusion in Clark’s eyes, she stood up occupying the man’s personal space.  “Yeah, this isn’t our first time, but from the lost look you have I will help you find the memory of me.”   _

  
  


_ “What are you talking about?”   _

  
  


_ “Two years ago, we met at the ‘Ark.’  I was young and stupid. A few free drinks had me in your arms, but that’s your angle, isn’t it?  Get the poor little girls drunk, so they can’t fight you, emit just the right amount pheromones and tease with your suave one-liners to charm your way into their bed.  You swore that I was meant to be with you like I was put on your path to find--some sort of bullshit like that. And then--”  Jabbing her finger into his chest,  “You were gentle with me at first, removing my clothes commenting on how soft my skin was--shit it was everything I thought my first time would be, but no, once you had me on the bed under you…you changed.”   _

  
  


_ Clamping her hand on his wrist, she forced him to feel the deep scars on her side.  “You ruined me, I was fine with it at the time thinking we were going to be together, but the next morning you tossed me this fucking card and forced a fucking pill down my throat so that I wouldn’t get pregnant then left!”   _

  
  


_ Yanking his hand away, he retreated backward as the memory of a younger omega who threatened to kill herself with is chef’s knife early one morning. Only excessive begging and a promise to pay for Raven’s services had calmed the girl,  “I am sorry, but I told you--”  The slap, though deserved, killed his excuses. _

  
  


_ “I met Raven, she tried to help me with the bite, but the treatment didn’t take.  I spent months with dirty looks from strangers, feeling gross in my own skin.  I wanted to fucking die!  Nearly took my life more than once, but that didn’t pan out since my parents found me in my apartment a day too fucking soon.”  Swallowing down her emotions she took in a deep breath,  “It was hell for me to continue breathing until a dear friend came to my rescue.  She offered me something no one else could. She helped me steady myself, healed me, and now is assisting me with my revenge.”   _

  
  


_ The thrill of fear ran through Clark’s body as his panic rose. “Listen, I am sorry for what I did to you, how things ended up for you--but whatever plans you have for revenge will not help you.  You will regret it, in the end, this anger and hate will not go away.  It will turn on you, and you will be more miserable than you are now.” _

  
  


_ “Yeah, well for however long it lasts I will have some peace, and that’s what matters to me.  After all don’t you do the same thing?  Only you get to relive those moments almost every night with a new lay, right? ”   _

  
  


_ Clarks scoffed at her words. Verbally wounded but angry he spoke. “No. You don’t understand. I stopped making this as much of a habit months back, but you are right. I need those girls to make me feel anything. Each sweet omega reminds me of what should have been and all the fucking expectations.” Despair and guilt weighed heavily on the man. But, anger and resentment kept Ontari from acknowledging the truth. Shaking his head to clear his thoughts, Clark knew that whatever this chick had drummed up in her mind wasn’t going to work.  He towered over her, out-weighed her, and was far stronger than her. He was short, but she was tiny.  _

  
  


_ Disregarding her final words Clark turned away and collected his coat,  “Forget the revenge, there isn’t anything you can physically do to me that I wouldn’t welcome. I deserve a fate worse than death which you can’t give me.  I don’t want to hurt you, but stop me from leaving, and I will protect myself.”  He locked eyes with her briefly, “Move.”  His commanding voice growled from the back of his throat, but the woman stayed where she was.  “I said move.”  Shoving her towards the bed, he stormed down the short hallway to the front door.  _

  
  


_ Peeling the chain link lock-free, he quickly flicked the deadbolt and opened the door.  Stern forest green eyes pinned him in place.  The woman tilted her head slightly, sizing up Clark allowing a few strands of brown locks to dangle over her shoulder.  “You must be Clark.”  She calmly stated as the girl from the bedroom jumped onto his back and jammed a needle into his carotid artery. _

  
  


_ Numbly struggling against the attack he dropped to his knees, plucking the syringe free he fought to prevent the heavy sleep from consuming him.  “You did well.  Go dress, and we will get you cleaned up, you don’t need to wear those scars anymore.  And definitely, need to be free of his scent.”  His vision blurred and the voice became muffled.  _

  
  


_ “Thank you.”  Her voice cracked as the adrenaline and emotions pulsed through her body.  She padded her way back to the bedroom leaving the two alone.   _

  
  


_ Clark’s body had lost its strength as he slumped over to his side.  Three other people in dressed as EMTs in all black approached with a stretcher, but all he could do was silently scream like he was in a bad dream.   _

 

__

 

_ *** _

  
  


Dr. Lexa Woods tapped her nails against the glass top of the table as she checked the time. ‘We need to wrap this up. My charge should not wake without an observer. He had not been the man I expected him to be.’. Her laptop sat in her line of sight, calling to her. But, her Board of Directors would see too much. They would ask too many questions about the person behind the bandages.

  
  


She had performed the first among many planned operations for her latest acquisition. The corner of her mouth upturned into a brief smirk as she realized that the men at this table would be horrified by the fate of Clark Griffin, the infamous playboy son of Jake and Abby Griffin.

  
  


She cleared her throat and refocused on the beta explaining what he believed to be the proposal for starting human trials of their newest skin replacement therapy. Her smirk blossomed into a feral grin. ‘These old fools still think its best application would be to relieve burn victims of their scar tissue. The had not considered the soft and silky texture of the synthskin, feminine to its core.’ 

  
  


Dr. Cage Wallace’s malicious grin appeared triumphant as he wrapped an arm around his favorite assistant. His beta blushed furiously. “Tad, we are so proud of your achievement. Men, and Dr. Woods, all those in favor of moving to human trials say aye.”

  
  


The unanimous response thrilled her business partner. Lexa’s disdain for the man grew annually as did the value of their shared enterprise. ‘Someday I can get rid of Wallace. His father, a far better man, had helped her when she inherited the massive Woods fortune but still had not presented. In the world of the obscenely wealthy one had to either be the richest or the most influential alpha; preferably, one could be both. At seventeen she graduated pre-med from Johns Hopkins and entered their medical school. Dr. Dante Wallace, a professor,  had recognized her amazing skill; and he helped her develop fake pheromones to make her appear to be an alpha. Such a prestigious university would be embarrassed by an omega or beta completing their most rigorous program. 

  
  


“Dr. Woods.” Cage’s voice interrupted her inner monologue. “I noticed that in this document laying out our plan for test subjects you stated that our plan was and I quote ‘short-sighted and limiting.’ How would you suggest we find a larger number of appropriate subjects for our experiment.” The cold bite to his language did not go unnoticed by the room. She suspected he had read his father’s files on her. They should have been destroyed long ago, but Cage appeared to be trying to force an alpha response. If she failed to emit a strong presence with her scent, he could expose her as a fraud.

  
  


Standing to full height, she leaned down the twenty feet of the table planting her fists on the glass. Her navy suit stretched taut on her long muscular arms. A deep growl resonated low in her throat. “Careful Cage, you would not want to lose too much credibility with your lack of creativity.” Her verdant green eyes flashed in anger. Her sharp canines appeared to lengthen as her scent demanded obedience.

  
  


Cage’s confusion at her response spoke volumes. He knew she was not an alpha. What he may not have understood though was unlike everyone else, she had never presented as anything. His father had embedded biometric synthglands in her neck. Dante had created them specifically for her using her DNA to create the chemical reactions. She dreaded the day that her latent beta or omega characteristics finally came into play. At twenty-four she knew it would either happen within the next year or never. Fortunately, her synthglands had a specific expiration date. She knew exactly when they would cease to work. Now, all she needed was the time to finish her work. She would have real gland within six months, but she had to know if her body would betray her by presenting--if it did her creation would fail.

  
  


Bested by his natural inclination, Dr. Cage Wallace bowed his head submitting to her in full view of the board. “I apologize for my tone. But, I would be interested in hearing your ideas as to how we could find more subjects quickly.”

  
  


With a brief nod of her head, she relaxed her stance, smoothed the jacket of her suit and resumed her seat. “Yes, you think the new skin would only be useful for burn victims, but have you considered those who have melanoma and have large portions cut out or acne scarring. I would even suggest that women who feel the skin on their face is losing its elasticity could possibly benefit from the newer look and feel of the skin. Expand your horizons. Think. Be creative. That is what we do here. If this doesn’t appeal to you, like I have said many times before, if you cannot get on board with what we are doing at Promethean Medical, I would be happy to buy out your shares. You only have a 15% stake in my company. Your father and I had a shared vision, yet you seek to invalidate me at every corner. It stops now. Otherwise, this is your last project.” 

  
  


The men of the board all solemnly nodded their heads leaving Cage shaking in fury. His coup failed. “We will heed your suggestions. When we finish this project, I will take your offer IF you pay 50% above the market share.”

  
  


“Agreed.” Lexa’s exterior calm hid her interior celebration. ‘Checkmate. Two years after Dante’s death and I finally, succeed in convince Cage to move on from this poorly considered partnership.’

  
  


“Is there any more business to be presented?” Lexa asked in a tone that suggested that the answer should be no.

  
  


No one spoke. 

  
  


“That’s it, gentlemen. We are dismissed. We will meet again next week.” A broad smile swept her features as the words fell from her lips. She bided her time for the men to vacate the room so that she could check the condition of her patient.

  
  


‘Oh, Mr. Griffin, what adventures do I have in store for you?’ Her cruel smirk curled her lips.

  
  



	2. Man or Monster?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More of the backstory and set up for the story itself. If you notice neither one of our (hero)ines are particularly nice people in the beginning. If you think about it, the one you love should make you a better person. That is part of what makes your journey together so special.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want to apologize for how the first posting went. Xevn already posted his. In fact, he doesn't even know I am posting this morning because I didn't want him to talk me out of it. My father passed Monday evening after a long hard battle with congestive heart failure. I live a 12-hour drive away. I couldn't sleep Monday night because my mind was churning while waiting for my husband and kids to wake up for the very long drive home. That night I needed something to smile about so I posted the first chapter early hoping the comments and kudos would lift my spirits. In doing so, I didn't put enough thought into the tagging. Unlike Xevn, I am not part of the LGBTQ community--I am just an ally, so a lot of the issues stated he flags for me because he has been there. I haven't. It was not done out of callousness, nor an effort to hurt anyone. It was selfish, self-centered stupidity entirely and unintentional. If I hurt you in any way, I want to apologize. 
> 
> For the record, my heart was broken along with yours the night 3.07 aired. The Clexa love story is by far one of my favorites ever, and I hated how it was tossed aside so easily even though the creators gave Lexa a little more of a role at the end of the season. I felt like her character's end was a disservice in so many ways. So, again I apologize to all of you. My story is really about two lost souls redeeming each other which is how I have always seen Clark and Lexa. It's why I wanted to write this one in the first place.

The door smacked the wall as the woman with angry green eyes stormed into the room. “In case you didn’t notice, that noise you hear blaring behind you are the alarms going off to the monitors that read your vitals. Get back into bed now before you damage any more of my work.” This woman didn’t smell or act right. Clark couldn’t get a pulse on her, though obviously enraged by the way she spoke, everything else about her seemed reserved yet commanding.

 

Trying to defuse the situation, he relaxed himself a bit and decided to soothe the woman with his scent. But something was very off as his tactic failed to produce any pheromones. Cerulean eyes searched emerald as he switched to using his charm instead because it was not the first morning that his hormones had failed to work. “Do I know you from somewhere?” Clark asked, but again wasn’t able to muster his usual tricks and was sharply reminded of the pain clenching his mouth shut. No, none of this was working in his favor, and he was running out of ideas to piece together this strange scenario.

 

Cruel lips ticked upward. “Let’s say we have several mutual acquaintances. You do not know me yet but, you and I are going to become quite well known to each other before all of this is over.I am Dr. Lexa Woods. And before you wonder, I have not had the pleasure of meeting your mother, but I understand she is world renown for her cardiothoracic surgical skill. Not even your mother and her powerful friends can help you here.”

 

Clark’s shoulders relaxed, not in submission, but relief. He shambled back to the bed and sat on the edge. Exhaustion overtook his small frame.

 

Dr. Wood’s brows arched in surprise. She had anticipated a different response. ‘Apparently, he is not a fan of his mother. Interesting.’

 

Dr. Woods used the remote to lift the bed into a sitting position before helping her patient to lie back. Much to her surprise, Clark reattached his IV and disengaged the roller clamp. Pain stormed through blue corneas. “You must have been off for quite a long time for you to be feeling the pain.”

 

Clark shook his head and whispered through his teeth refusing to move his sore jaw. “Already hurt. I need a different pain med. Used narcotics as a pastime. Buccal Fentanyl might help.”

 

Eyeing her patient warily, the brunette flipped her long braid over her shoulder before sitting on the edge of the bed. “I know that talking is uncomfortable, but I need you to answer a few questions. How often do you speak to your parents?”

 

“I don’t if I can help it. Dad died in a car accident six years ago. Mother, God, that woman. I avoid her. She tracks me down periodically to remind me that I am a lousy sack of shit disappointment to her. With the exception of making sure I show up for my regularly scheduled shots and ‘therapy,’’ we actually speak maybe twice a year. The next time shouldn’t be until August or so.”

 

Clark’s response though perfect for her timeline worried Lexa. A sliver of guilt bubbled to the surface before the rough voice startled her thoughts. “Do us both a favor, Whatever plan my mother has for making me into the alpha son I am supposed to be, drop it. I can’t be her puppet. I just can’t do it anymore.”

 

Lexa pulled the band out of her braid, allowing her fingers to separate the three strands. Äs her hair relaxed into beautiful waves, her voice snarled. “I don’t work for your mother. And, this project will be seen to the finish with or without your cooperation. I am sure your mother wanted to rehabilitate you to carry the family name. But, my plan is different; it will protect all the betas and omegas that you haven’t damaged yet. As for your mother, you will never disappoint her again because she won’t recognize you once I am finished. I will raze you and then rebuild. You will be my masterpiece. And, more importantly, your days of selfish cruelty are over.”

 

***

 

Speaking into her recorder, “Dr. Lexa Woods, January 2nd. Subject is twenty-three-year-old alpha male.” Using scissors, she cut through his expensive sweater he had thrown on prior to exiting the apartment. “Skin of his chest is supple and mostly hairless. Follicle therapy should remove all recurring hair growth.”

 

She exchanged the scissors for a rotary blade, slicing through denim from hip to ankle on one leg, then the other. She pulled the destroyed garments from his still form. Before discarding the jeans, she slipped his wallet and phone from his pocket. “Have Jackson remove all evidence of his telephone pings from all cell towers beginning at midnight.” Popping off the back, she pulled the SIM and data cards for later inspection before breaking the hardware across the metal examination table.

 

“Hips and legs are quite shapely. Leg hair is light and wispy. Let’s try electrolysis on the hair follicles followed by follicle therapy. Treatment results will determine how much skin will be replaced. Facial reconstruction will be my first priority. Please prep the OR for orthognathic realignment procedures. Let’s try to use the synthskin grafts to determine how well it will work for removing the beard.”

 

Leaning over the supine form from above his head her fingers probed the underside of his chin and jaw. “Removal of the scent glands and shaving the Adam’s apple should be in the second surgery. I want to prepare the OR for two weeks following the first procedure. Ontari, be sure and not schedule any other private surgeries for that window. All other surgical procedures will be determined and scheduled after establishing the success rate. Ontari, have these transcribed and on my desk before you leave today. End. Wait.”

 

She had lifted his right arm by the wrist to examine the gracile bones of his fingers, but the long line under her thumb forced her to flip his hand over to understand what she felt. A wide three-inch long scar ran the length of the wrist over his vein. The roughness of the skin and sloppiness of the cut bespoke of self-inflicted harm. Grabbing his left arm, she found a weaker duplicate cut. Ignoring his sex, she drew her fingers down his left leg rolling the toes outward. Yet, another cut along his left ankle, the skin more torn than cut. Had he used a razor blade or a boxcutter? “Signs of self-harm. Possible suicide attempt. The patient will need frequent visible verification and subdural bp monitor. Ontari, please add this addendum. It seems your Mr. Griffin is more complicated than we suspected. You may go home once these are on my desk. End.”

 

***

 

The new painkillers took the edge off the ache but left his head empty and hollow. ‘She says she doesn’t work for my mother, but who else would try to improve a piece of crap like me?’

 

The wild wind whipped through his long blonde hair as he raced his best friend, Finn Collins. Clark’s red Hennessey Venom took the curves on the winding Pacific Coast Highway. He knew how much Collins hated losing. Seconds after that thought the black Bugatti Veyron Super Sport tried to pass on his left. Laughing, Clark whipped in front but misjudged the distance. His rear quarter panel made contact with the nose on the driver’s side. Speed, force and driving conditions flipped the Bugatti over the guardrail and into the Pacific.

 

Clark had been inconsolable as the divers searched for the body.

 

Between the loss of his father followed closely by that of his best friend, Clark lost anchor and hope. His life spun out of control. Heroin, alcohol, and women brought him his only peace. Night after night he searched for a woman who could put the pieces back together, make him whole. Only for the morning light to reveal a sweet omega deserving of so much more than he had to offer. If only his mother could have accepted him for who he really was like his best friend had. Finn had understood the falseness of his skin, and he was gone.

 

“Wake up, Mr. Griffin. I need to change your bandages.”

 

Lexa ran her fingers through his hair gathering the silky locks into a short ponytail. She slipped a hair tie onto it. Fearful blue eyes met confident green. Using her fingernail, Dr. Woods peeled the sterile tape from the skin underneath his ears. Inching the bandages loose from baby-smooth pink skin that glowed along his chin and cheeks. She removed the last of the bandages.

 

“Hmm. I believe we were more successful than I had hoped.”

 

“Can I see a mirror, please?”

 

Dr. Woods shook her head. “No, I think it’s for the best that you don’t see the progress until we are further along. Is there anything special you would like to eat for dinner? You are having surgery again tomorrow so tonight is about making you happy.”

 

Clark turned his head and looked at the blank white wall. “I don’t care about food, but do you think I could have an acrylic paint set and brushes after my surgery; I know oil paints and canvas are too much to ask. Maybe a sketch pad, some charcoal. I need to be doing something other than staring at the walls.”

 

Lex watched in fascination as Clark nervously wet his lips. His eyes though occasionally landing on her rarely made eye contact without her physical insistence. “Clark. Are you okay?”

 

He nodded his head, but his verbal response clashed with the motion. “No. I don’t think so. But, I haven’t been okay for a very long time, so it isn’t anything new to me.”

 

“Okay. I will bring you those art supplies so that you have them in a few days. I will bring your favorite meal. I believe it was steak and potatoes.”

 

Tears welled in blue eyes. He shook his head quickly. “Not steak. Finn’s favorite was steak, not mine.”

 

Lexa shut the door as she walked up the hallway. ‘So, Ms. Reyes information is not entirely truthful. She hates him enough to want to torture him too? But, why?’

 

Fifteen minutes of online searching produced a simple answer that was far better than she had hoped. An old Instagram photograph of Clark, his best friend Finn, and Finn’s fiance Raven coupled with the news story recounting the events leading up to Finn’s death. Ms. Reyes could be useful.

 

***

 

Clark drunkenly walked up the drive to enter his mother’s house through the garage hoping to avoid another lecture on how an alpha should behave. He managed to get through the mudroom to the kitchen. He grabbed a bottle of water from the refrigerator and headed to the back staircase to sneak up to his room.

 

“Clark Edward Griffin. Get back down here now.” He cringed feeling the hatred rolling through her words.

 

“Yes, mother. We missed you at Finn’s funeral.”

 

She shrugged. “Pardon me. I didn’t feel wasting time on the dead would help make my son be the man he was born to be. You are an alpha yet you are as weak as the most pathetic omega. How can you bear the name Griffin yet I am more of a man than you. Your father would be so embarrassed by what you have become.”

 

Each word chipped a larger hole in his soul. “What would you have me do mother? My interests don’t align with the world’s demands. I am nothing more than a disappointment in your eyes. Never have I been fascinated by sports, science or medicine. It’s always been art, mother!”

 

“Clark--” Her voice growled deeply in warning, but he wouldn’t allow it.

 

“I had a fucking scholarship paid for by the Getty Foundation! Full ride that I earned to UCLA, and you managed to fuck it all up before I even stepped foot off the plane!” Clenching his fists, Clark visibly trembled in anger. “So yeah I flunked out of Duke because I am not cut out to be like you. You may like what you do, but I hate it. I need to express myself; I love the colors, the textures, the emotions, juxtapositions and the depths it takes me to when I am creating. I can be me without your endless crapload of expectations shoved down my goddamn throat! Finn was my real family, the only one who knew who I am and what I conceal to make you happy within this monstrosity you call your son! My only family died in that car accident, and now I am left alone with you.” A choked cry sputtered out of his mouth as all the anger welling up inside him was swallowed up by complete desolation.

 

His guard receded beneath the swell leaving him defenseless to his mother’s vicious rebuke. It wasn’t an open-handed smack, no she threw her whole weight into the punch dislodging his jaw knocking him on his ass. “Well if I am not your mother, then I might as well be your warden. Just remember, Clark, you asked for this.” Glaring down into the tear stung red eyes, Abby stood tauntingly over her son. “You will learn things the hard way about falling into line.”

 

Storming up the stairs and out of his sight, he dreaded what she could be doing. Dazed from the blow he couldn’t move, the bruising pain throbbed along his jaw keeping his voice trapt. Only the sounds of stuff being tossed around in the room above filled the high pitched whine in his ears.

 

His current pain was nothing compared to that day as he drowned in the memory, he pulled his legs to his chest. Wrapping his arms around them, he fought to control the beast rearing its ugly head within him. The alpha howling at the back of his mind demanded their proper union; a union Dr. Abigail Griffin wanted more than her son; a union Clark couldn’t survive.

 

“Clark, what the fuck is this?”

 

His mother’s eyes flashed violently waving around the photograph he had kept safely hidden from prying eyes.

 

“That’s me, Mother. The real me,” he whispered. His heart betrayed his body by speaking the truth.


	3. Hello, I Must Be Going

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A little more about what is going on in Lexa's head and smidge more about Clark too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since you all have been kind enough to produce 1000 hits in 2 days, I thought I would go ahead and post the next chapter. The first seven are written chp 8 is around halfway. I have the ideas for 9, 10 and 11, but they aren't written. I will be slowing down on posting after this as a result. And, for those of you wanting the sex scenes well that part of the story isn't written yet, and might not be for awhile. Clark and Lexa have a lot of things that they have to deal with first...

Two Days Later

  
  


Lexa loosened her tie and put her reading glasses on her nose. Ontari, her administrative assistant, had handed her a file folder on her way out of the office. A business dinner and then checking on her patient, who still slept under heavy sedation, had prevented her from reading the contents until now.

  
  


_ From the Desk of Dr. Nia Queen, PsyD _

_ Re: Clark Griffin _

  
  


_ Mr. Griffin refuses to participate in treatment. Though he arrived in the ER with minutes left on his life, he has no interest in correcting his ailment at this time.  _

  
  


_ The patient was found by his mother with three opened veins lying naked in his shower with the water running. No note has been submitted, but I suspect his mother would have destroyed any evidence that might prove that her alpha son made an attempt on his own life. Social status has remained important to my colleague since we were both in pre-med together. ER reports the only explanation he gave was that he didn’t want to leave behind a mess for someone else to clean. _

  
  


_ Blood testing on arrival, which Dr. Griffin informed me should be kept out of the system, showed high levels of Alphatest, the synthetic hormone removed from the market two years ago believed to help Betas have Alpha behavioral characteristics. I cannot prove but have my suspicions that Dr. Griffin injected her son. Though the doctor denied all knowledge, the only injection site found was at the base of his skull. There is no way Clark could have injected himself in that location. When asked about the drug Clark appeared confused and disinterested. His response was thus, “Why would I know anything about a recalled experiment? I’m not my mother; you had better ask her. If you ask me where to get the purest Heroin in town, that I can help you with any day of the week.” _

  
  


_ The alpha rages and mood swings first exhibited upon arrival dissipated within the first fourteen days of his stay. We held him in seclusion for another thirty days at his mother’s insistence; however, the patient’s age made her demand uncomfortable. Legally, if he had told us to release him, we would have been forced to do so. Mr. Griffin never attempted to make any demands of any kind. His submissive behavior is contrary to the first two weeks of his visit. Without his mother’s knowledge, we retested his blood this morning. Alphatest is no longer present. It is my finding that mood swings, and possibly his depression may be attributed to the injection. He will be released tomorrow morning.  _

  
  


At first glance, it appeared that Ontari’s mother, Dr. Queen, had no knowledge of her daughter’s abuse by the patient. To the outsider, it would also appear that Dr. Queen was unaware that her daughter’s revenge had been set in motion by the release of the patient.

  
  


Lexa refilled her scotch glass and contemplated the meaning of the findings. The longer she considered her patient, the more she questioned her ability to follow through with Dr. Queen’s demands. 

  
  


Did Dr. Griffin try to make her son an alpha or was he a weak alpha she wanted to enhance? Why would someone inject an alpha with a hormone that was known to cause neurological issues? Had Dr. Griffin known the consequences could have been fatal? The more she discovered about her captive, the less she knew of him.

  
  


***

  
  


“Good morning, Mr. Griffin. I know you can’t speak yet. Your throat should still be raw for a few more days. But, if you feel strong enough I can remove your catheter and the IV. I have your new room ready for you.” Lexa had entered Clark’s room with less speed than usual, showing reticence and fatigue. She leaned against the side wall and crossed her arms over her chest.

  
  


Clark had been staring at the ceiling until Lexa walked in; he might have continued had Lexa not mentioned his new room.  He turned his head, questioning her with his eyes. 

  
  


“Oh, you want to know why you suddenly have a change in accommodation. Normally, I wouldn’t feel the need to explain, but you have been exceptionally easy going. I would like to foster that behavior if at all possible. You live in my private facility. I perform cosmetic surgery for high profile clients here away from the prying eyes of the public. Tomorrow morning I will be doing rhinoplasty on one of the rich and talentless. I need this space for her recovery.”  

  
  


She stepped away from the wall and used the remote to adjust the bed. She pulled Clark’s hair back with her right hand and leaned in to examine his neck. Clark could ignore the probing fingers along his throat, but when the doctor leaned in and sniffed at his scent glands worry clouded his mind. 

  
  


Lexa emitted a light calming scent that filled his nose taking him to a deep forest right after a light rain.  Pleasant images of dog’s rose and bluebells painted his mind, taking him back to a time in his youth when expectations for him were absent.  “You, my dear, have nothing to fear. You smell perfect.”

  
  


At the aforementioned word perfect, Clark’s brow rose with a slight strain, much of his facial muscles were still under a slight burn of pain.  ‘How can I be perfect when I can’t seem to make my scent glands obey?’  The question never left his lips, but his doctor’s smile gave away her understanding.

  
  


“My little pup, you still misunderstand what I desire from you. That vile alpha is not what I want.”  Her smile only grew with her words as excitement filled her chest.  “I want you to close your eyes. Call to your alpha. If he arrives, it will be for the last time.” 

  
  


Clark shyly looked up at the doctor worriedly. 

  
  


“Go on. Try to find your alpha. Call the bastard forward.” The disdain in Dr. Wood’s voice caused a faint tremor to run through her charge which slowly escalated as the room sat quietly anticipating.

  
  


“Hey. Breathe.”  

  
  


Clark closed his eyes. Slim fingers entwined with his. A faint purr could be heard. He allowed his consciousness to slide into his depths finding his loneliness, sorrow, and anger. In the past, this would be how he found his alpha’s strength raging toward the surface. Not today. He found a stillness like the glassy surface of a pond on a cold morning. His eyes flew open and met mirth-filled green.

  
  


“Did he answer?”

  
  


A timid smile slipped onto Clark’s face as he shook his head no. Giving his hand one last squeeze, she said, “Are you up for a change of room?”

  
  


Lexa ran her left hand through the wild tangly curls of his shoulder-length hair and smiled.  Clark returned it with his first genuine expression of happiness since Finn’s death.

  
  
  


***

  
  


The months crawled past. Clark measured time by the number of days between surgeries, no longer caring about dates or schedules. He had become accustomed to his solitary existence with only Dr. Woods as caretaker. Sometimes days would pass without the two of them speaking; food would mysteriously appear at his door. Other times Dr. Woods would sit at the oak desk on the far side of his room and do paperwork as Clark focused on his latest drawing or painting. Losing himself in the brushstrokes, Clark felt free, but he always dreaded the day Dr. Woods would explain their end game. Lexa’s awareness of Clark’s bad choices and her relationship with Ontari terrified the alpha, yet in a way, his imprisonment in the lab gave him a sense of peace he had never known.

  
  


Lexa had begun to crave the blonde’s presence. At first, she had discounted the seriousness of it believing she found comfort in their solitude together. Unlike everyone else in her life, Clark asked for very little and demanded nothing. But, as the fights with Cage Wallace escalated, she relied on the gentle patience of Clark’s shy smile. Many of her sleepless nights found her calming her own nerves by carelessly running her fingers through his curling blonde hair while perusing the detailed drawings in his sketchbook. Most people would have considered this an invasion of privacy, but one stormy night the weather woke Clark. Their eyes met in the darkness, Clark’s breathing eased at seeing her haunting his room. Without comment, he swapped the barely used sketchbook in her hand for one that he had filled some time earlier. “I finished this one last week.”

  
  


Tonight, she entered to inject a sedative. Thinking over the pleasant, if not happy, routine they had developed together without conscious thought. The two discussed movies they watched on his television or the meal they ate together, but never the changes in his physique Lexa’s work remained off limits for discussion. Clark never objected to the pills that appeared at his breakfast plate nor did he seem alarmed as the hair on his body ceased to grow. The lack of mirror could explain why he never asked about the changes to his face. Yet, Lexa believed him to be quite aware. 

  
  


Apprehension twisted in her gut as Lexa considered that her favorite silent companion might reject her presence. His breast augmentation surgery would be tomorrow morning. She both anxiously anticipated the surgery and dreaded the change it would bring. Up to now, Clark could not discern her plan for him. But, now the evidence would be undeniable. Complacent Clark would disappear and be replaced with an angry though powerless alpha.  

  
  


Casting the dread from her mind, she kept her thoughts focused on her promise, though now it felt like it was something dreamed up from her own desires,  “It’s that time again.”  She whispered gently into his ear, always pleased to see his submissive side play to her sweet commands.  Clark raised from his seated position and found his place in the wheelchair beside his bed.  In these few moments, Clark’s behavior persisted to be obedient and accepting, never minding the eyes following his every move.  “That’s a good boy.”  Her serene voice rewarded him as she approached.  Without having to ask he already presented his hand to her as this became another routine he never fought against.  

  
  


Part of her wondered if it was that weakness in him that was hoping she was putting him out of his misery, but every time that smile when Clark would wake greeted her she knew it had to be something else.  Pulling out the small IV kit, she started the line finding a vein with little effort as her perfect patient remained sufficiently hydrated.  The deftly skilled hands worked the needle in with minimal effort, and without the usual pain, most nurses provoke.  Using the infusor, she drew a small amount of blood before administering the general anesthesia.  “Sleep well; I’ll be here when you wake.”  She assured him as his body drooped in place.    

  
  


***

  
  


The tremor in Lexa’s hand could not be ignored. Due to supply issues, the anesthesiologist had used an alternative medication for this procedure. Halfway through the surgery, Clark’s blood pressure dropped. Bile burned in her trachea as Lexa blinked back tears. 

  
  


The second time she had said clear the paddles had kick-started his heart. Though everyone in the operating theater, both nurses and the anesthesiologist could only witness the fear of losing a patient. Lexa knew that her pain ran deeper. Her fondness for her patient complicated matters.

  
  


She dumped her scrubs in the laundry hamper, checked Clark’s vitals and went for an aimless walk.

  
  


Half an hour later Lexa found herself leaning on the door frame to his room. She had ignored the covered painting in the corner for a month, but it called to her in the darkness tonight. Clark kept it covered while she worked, but he added to the oil painting daily since she brought him the oils and a blank canvas. 

  
  


She turned the lamp on and stared at the dropcloth as if it would recoil in fear. “Clark, what have you been up to?”

  
  


Lexa’s knees failed her as dropped into the battered loveseat facing the television. The painting immediately to the left of it devastated her. Passionate brushstrokes produced a shapely blonde woman teasingly looking at the audience with her face half veiled by beautiful golden curls. The pouty lips and azure eyes left little doubt as to the identity of the woman.

  
  


***

  
  


Clark opened his eyes and cleared his throat. Unlike his previous surgeries, he wore a nose cannula, and the heart monitor continued its numeric readout at eye level. The panic subsided as he noticed the figure sleeping in the chair next to the bed.

  
  


He fumbled for the remote and raised the bed. He hoped the loud whine of the motor would not wake the doctor. The deep bruising beneath her eyes suggested that she had not rested in days.  Using the remote again, he turned on the light above the bed trying to discern the tightness in his chest. He glimpsed his chest tightly wrapped in gauze. 

  
  


_ Face down in a puddle of his own puke. Clark shudders as another withdrawal spasm cuts deep. The paint chipping off the walls and the single bulb lighting the room reminds him that he can’t remember where he is. _

  
  


_ The door slammed into the wall as his favorite feisty latina storms toward him. _

  
  


_ “Clark. Stop being an asshole,” Raven brushed sweaty hair away from his head. “I know this isn’t the life you want, but you can’t keep destroying omegas to make yourself feel better.”  _

  
  


_ She handed him a bottle of water; her eyes scrutinized his condition. Wordlessly she pushed up his sleeve showing the most recent track marks. Anger, pain, and disappointment gathered. _

  
  


_ “Getting stoned and fucking every man and woman you meet will not make you a man. I doubt even Abby would want you to be that kind of alpha. She wants you to be a man’s man: play sports, drink too much, sleep around. She doesn’t want you to claim all of them and reject them later.” _

  
  


_ She dropped a bottle of aspirin into his upturned hand. “I can’t be your caretaker. I didn’t mind helping you try to be happier when you didn’t hurt other people.” _

  
  


_ She limped over to sink across the room and washed her hands. Catching blue eyes in the mirror above the sink she squeezed her eyes shut for a second before finishing. “Finn would have hated you for this as I do. Don’t call me next time you find yourself drowning in puke. Go home. Sober up. Grow up. Not all of us get the life we want.” _

  
  


Lexa woke to quiet sniffles. She made every effort not to startle her patient but knew that he should be feeling dehydrated from the oxygen. Without speaking, she walked over to the cabinet and poured a glass of ice water allowing Clark the time to get his emotions under control before she approached.

  
  


She walked to the edge of the bed. “Here. Drink this. You have been out for more than three days. Your body needs the liquid.” 

  
  


Clark grinned at her and took the cup. He sipped the cup cautiously. Looking at Lexa, he could see her fear. 

  
  


“Thank you.”

  
  


“A glass of water is not that complicated, Clark.”

  
  


He rolled his eyes in response and shook his head slightly. “Thank you for seeing me, the real me. I thought my acceptance died with Finn. But, you see me.” Happy tears streaked down his cheeks. His mind wandered back to his mother’s reaction.

  
  


_ “Clark, what the fuck is this?”  _

  
  


_ His mother’s eyes flashed violently waving around the photograph he had kept safely hidden from prying eyes.  _

  
  


_ “That’s me, Mother. The real me,” he whispered. His heart betrayed his body by speaking the truth. _

  
  


_ “This picture better be a joke, Clark. I didn’t raise my son to be a dress wearing freak.” _

  
  


_ His eyes wandered while fury burned through his veins. “I’m not a freak. I am a woman trapped in man’s body. Dad knew it. Finn knew it. Why can’t you accept it? Why do I have to be a man and an alpha? I don’t feel like either.” _

  
  


_ Abby’s lips curled in disdain. “I guess you need to go back to the clinic for more treatments. Mount Weather guaranteed you were cured of this foolishness. However, if you want to continue to piss your life away with drugs and booze, you might want to consider that I pay the bills. If you want this life, you better make me happier starting now.”  _

  
  


_ She turned and left the room, but as she left Clark heard a deadbolt drawn on the door. He knew the hell his life would be again if she had chosen to engage the lock. _


	4. Mirror, Mirror on the Wall

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dr. Woods experiment gets complicated by her conscience and colleagues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you remember the scene with Anya in the cage at Mt. Weather, think of that sort of sadness in the lab. You will understand when you get there. Warning. Sad. Triggering for some people maybe, but I doubt it if 100 is your thing.

Flashing blue lights blocked the entrance to her sacred laboratory. A sliver of relief carried through her being as she realized her favorite patient remained safe at home. His time at this facility had been hours, not days.

  
  


Dr. Woods rolled down the darkened window to her black Aston Martin, “Officer can you tell me where I can park to get into my offices?”

  
  


“Yes, ma’am. Sergeant Granger had hoped you arrived soon. If you park next to the CSI Unit truck, she will escort you to wherever you need to go. She’s in need of access to the records of one of your top secret projects.”

  
  


She rolled her eyes and nodded, closing the window as she drove the short distance to park her car. ‘If they wanted my fingerprints, they just had to ask.’ She suspected this tactic would provide an easy excuse for them to check the fingerprints found on her car. ‘If they are looking for a certain blonde, he was never in this car.’ Clark’s image had been on the news as missing for weeks, but then it stopped. A few reporters had suggested kidnapping, but that did not explain the army of officers tracking in and out of her building. ‘This has to be about something else. But, what?’ 

  
  


With her commanding facade intact, she picked up her briefcase and stepped from her vehicle with her head held high. Unless Ontari’s mother had been setting her up along or possibly Ontari’s tongue had betrayed them, there would be nothing incriminating for Lexa onsite. 

  
  


A tall, slender brunette walked her direction with a politician’s smile. “Hi. I’m Sergeant Teresa Suarez. Can you tell me where I might find Dr. Alexandra Woods?”

  
  


The lack of recognition in the woman’s eyes clarified the question “Before I answer, can you tell me what this is about?”

  
  


Suarez evaluated Lexa’s stance and clothing. If she had not pieced together who she was yet, it would not take much longer. 

  
  


“No, but we already have one man in custody and a BOLO on another. We’re here to gather evidence.” The statement caused a sigh of relief to escape Lexa’s unguarded lips. 

  
  


“Dr. Lexa Woods; this is my company. Can you explain to me what you are talking about and how I can help? I am at a loss for what you could possibly want with me.”

  
  


Eyeing the CEO up and down with an appreciation of her form, Suarez took note of the less than amused eyes of the alpha.

  
  


“I need access to all of your labs and all paperwork that Cage Wallace supervised.”

  
  


Cocking her head a little she wondered what this was really about, but also knew her legal rights to an active search.  “If you want to see any of that it will require a warrant. Do you have one?”  

  
  


Suarez opened the glass door for her holding hand out as if to say lead the way. As the alpha stepped onto the black and white checkered tile of the atrium, the officer spoke behind her. “Please. This is not my first investigation. I have multiple warrants. One for each lab, office and each server.”

  
  


“Care to show me these official documents?  Not my first time either and you will get nothing until I know exactly what you are looking for.”  Her words were dull, but her posture was anything but.  

  
  


“I expected nothing less. The documents are waiting for you on your desk. If you had arrived at your usual time, I would have been able to hand them to you there. But, you were late this morning.”

  
  


“Usual time?  Are you watching me?”  Lexa’s eyes sharply snapped towards Suarez with intimidation permeating in her questions. 

  
  


“We’ve been watching all of you. You jog out of your home compound every morning at 5:45. You sprint for the first half mile before breaking into your stride. Most mornings you jog along the waterfront. Roundtrip, you run seven miles. You return home before sunrise. You leave in one of your three cars before 7:30. You are in your office before 8 a.m. unless you are flying out of the country which happens every few months. Should I go on? Do you need to know about the other board members? By the way, you might want to recommend exercise. None of the others could hold a candle to you.”

  
  


“Sounds like more of an obsession than anything else uh Detective Smith is it…?”

  
  


Chapstick colored lips pursed in frustration. “Suarez. Detective Suarez. My obsession is with finding who is kidnapping the strung-out alphas who are too doped up to find their way home. The wealthier kids have only had a few disappear, but the poor. God, the poor lose almost one a week. Am I obsessed? Yes, I am. Whoever is taking our kids is going down.” She leaned into the alphas personal space losing her cool. She reached around the CEO to push the call button for the elevator.

  
  


Squaring her shoulders she leaned forward, “But you wanted Wallace’s information not mine so why are you watching me?” 

  
  


“Wallace isn’t that original. Whatever he’s come up with, the idea had to come from somewhere else. I had reason to believe it might have involved you, but after observing you, I seriously doubt you would be so stupid.” 

  
  


“Indeed, I would never allow myself to be as naive as that pathetic so-called alpha.  What I do is create perfection where little lies and get paid for it.  He, on the other hand, would be this reckless.  If he is the one kidnapping  _ alpha youths, _ then it would make sense to me.  If this doesn’t take me down as collateral damage, I may just have some evidence to help you.  I need assurance that it won’t.  Are you capable enough to provide me the simple service?” 

  
  


The officer shrugged her shoulders. “I can’t make those kinds of promises until I see what we’ve come for. If I find evidence that you were aware of his side experiments, then you will be sitting right beside him at the table. If you and the rest of the board know as little as we believe, well then, you may have to testify against him to help our side. Either way, you are either with us or against us. You can’t stay on the sidelines for this one.”

  
  


“Dante was a genius; his offspring isn’t.  Though I am surprised, he would venture out to these lengths to prove he could ever compare to his father’s work.  There are a few video notes from the last meeting I can provide that now make sense with your ill-theory of the imbecile.  I may cooperate with your investigation, but only if you can assure me that you will no longer follow me around like a lovesick puppy.”  Allowing the smirk to tug at her lips she waited patiently for the Detective to make a counteroffer. 

  
  


Suarez stepped out of the alpha’s personal space and onto the elevator pushing the button for the top floor on her way to lean on the back wall. “I can’t make any promises about not following you around. You know as well as I do that my orders often come from above my paygrade. But, I haven’t been staking outside your house for at least a week. But, even though you were helpful here I want it stated for the record that I am well aware that Dante Wallace dabbled in playing with the scent glands of young alphas. We both know you were either a victim or a helper monkey. Would you like to clarify?”

  
  


“For the record, I was neither.  Let’s focus on the sick fuck toying in genetics that he has no understanding for.”  She shot back with a flash of carefully expelled anger.

  
  


“Which sick fuck are we talking about here Cage, Dante or you?”

  
  


“It’s obvious detective, Cage.”  

  
  


“The only things obvious here are that I am not attracted to alpha bitches and that all three of you fucked with the genetics of young alphas. The difference is that one of you did it illegally. All of you shouldn’t have played God. But, then again, that is what you do here, isn’t it?”

  
  


“I don’t play God. I only perfect the imperfections he created.  I wouldn’t want to ever compare myself to being someone inadequate like him.” 

  
  


As they stepped off the elevator and entered the CEO’s offices, the number of police dwindled to only a few. “Inadequate or not, the documents are waiting on your desk. Read them, and then I expect you to show me to his lab as no one seems to have the clearance to open the door with the retinal scanner.”

  
  


Nearly rolling her eyes she sat down at her desk, taking as much time as she wanted to read through the warrants.  She knew it would get under the detective’s skin.  Lexa scrutinized the paperwork even going as far as the punctuation and meaning of each order.  Feeling confident she had a clear understanding of the document’s demands she let out a refreshing breath and stood from her desk.  “Cage is a fool to think anything in this building can be his alone.  I will let you in, and if there are any video records, you may review them yourself.  I don’t know, honestly, what he has been up to nor have I ever cared.  But what he may be doing is something I want no part in as medicine is for healing purposes and not for exploit.”  The last sentence rippled inward as she remembered her patient at her compound. 

  
  


“I guess we will have to see the evidence for me to be sure. Why don’t you lead the way?”

  
  


***

  
  


Hours later the detective had returned to Dr. Wood’s office to open another door. Perplexed by the request, Lexa followed the detective deep into Wallace’s lab. 

  
  


“I’ve never seen this door before. It isn’t in the blueprints. When I visit the lab, it is only for a demonstration. The project was supposed to help betas have alpha abilities or qualities. Most of the time the experiments are still in theoretical model stages.  I rarely go beyond the large workspace. So, I am at a loss as to what this is. Storage maybe?”

  
  


“Can you try the retinal scanner? It has rejected the override key you gave us.”

  
  


Lexa swallowed her concerns. She leaned over the scanner. 

  
  


“Entry denied.” The digital voice enraged the alpha. Her brow furrowed. Grasping the red phone on the wall, she pushed extension six. “Wick. Get your ass up here to Wallace’s lab. I need you to break his locking system. The bastard has locked me out of my own facility.” She slammed the receiver down. 

  
  


The detective noticed the pink-tinged signs of the woman’s embarrassment. Had she not barked her orders through the phone, the detective’s team would have opened the door by any means necessary. She knew her crew would have enjoyed the challenge, but doubted Dr. Woods appreciation for indoor pyrotechnics.

  
  


Suarez chose to remain silent and study the now agitated alpha. When she arrived, Suarez still believed Dr. Wood’s might have approved of Wallace’s endeavors. Her doubts grew by the second.

  
  


The elevator opened revealing a guy wearing a hideously bright Hawaiian shirt, shorts, and flipflops. “What did that prick have installed?” 

  
  


He opened the recessed access panel. “Ah” He attached leads to two wires that connected to a tablet in his hand. 

  
  


He flipped open a keypad beneath the scanner and typed in a six-digit code that appeared on his tablet. “I can’t believe the fucker used his own birthday for the override code.” The door opened with the hiss of a breach to an airlock.

  
  


“Dude, that’s so not good. I’m out of here, boss. If you need me again just holler.” Wick casually waved as he disappeared from the room.

  
  


Suarez raised her eyebrows at Dr. Woods.

  
  


“He’s eccentric, but he’s the best techie we have. If I can dream it,  he can make it.”

  
  


The lights opened into a large containment unit. Dr. Woods gasped as she took in the size and layout of the room. Cages lined the four walls. Each contained one or two young adults blinking at her as if the light hurt their eyes.

  
  


“Fucking Christ.” Rage vented through her nose as she struggled to believe the insipid fool capable of this level of masterminding.  Now was not the time to determine how this developed without her knowledge, the pungent scent of decay alarmed her into action.  “Dammit, Wallace.”  Ignoring the detective and her people as they filed into the room she opened latch after latch walking down the wall allowing those that were strong enough to step out. The sheer number of people hidden in this lab floored her. 

  
  


“Detective!”  Snapping back at the woman who was still in shock over their discovery, Lexa demanded her focus.  “Be useful, get EMS down here these people have to be evaluated.”  With a nod, the detective collected herself and started towards the door.  

  
  


Continuing down the long line of cages her keen sense of smell led her to the first of many deceased victims. “That’s Tris. I think she died this morning.” A young blonde-haired boy stated between sniffles. “She was my cousin.”  Studying the body, she suspected the young girl had died days ago and noted the festering surgical wounds around her neck, but abandoned any further assessment. 

  
  


There would be time to sort through the dead, now was the time to save as many of the living as possible. She took her coat off and wrapped it around the boy’s shoulders. He shivered as she touched his neck checking his pulse. Without saying too much, Lexa checked the lymph glands in his neck and his eye acuity. 

  
  


Finishing her short examination she heard Suarez’s approach, “Detective, can you take a quick walk with me?”

  
  


They stepped back into the peaceful isolation of the lab as the emergency teams pass them. “I have only looked at two individuals so far. I noticed their glands were removed. These are not alphas, betas nor omegas. I guess you could say they are the closest to being omegas in body chemistry now, but it isn’t who they are. They are not on the spectrum any longer. They need a thorough examination, but I think you have a room full of people to use for evidence. But, all of the living will need extensive medical care starting with food and water.”

  
  


“Woods, I am at a loss here.  I don’t know whether I should be arresting you for criminal negligence or what… This happened on your watch!”  Overwhelmed by the cruelty that was found in the other room she couldn’t hold back her emotions.  

  
  


Lexa grabbed the detective by her shoulders and pulled her close,  “Now is not the time to throw around accusations.”  Tightening her grip, she kept her tone even. She needed the beta to focus.  “There are kids in there that are gravely ill. Many of them are dead or dying.  We need to help them. That’s your first priority.  Whatever comes after can wait. Do you understand?”  

  
  


Lowering her head in submission, she knew Lexa was right, and whatever their next move was, they had to ensure the survival of the victims first.  “Yes.  What do you need?”  Freed from Lexa’s grip, she retained her composure.

  
  


“We, Detective, need to contain the scene to this facility until you have Dr. Wallace in cuffs.  Bring the hospital to us, whoever you can get and as many as you can get.  I have plenty of medical supplies, but what I don’t have is the correct amount of hands to assist with this mess.  While you are making your calls, I will work with the officers and EMS teams and sort through the victims. I need to make sure the most critical are tended to first.” 

  
  


In a heartbeat, the doctor had gone from suspect to the one calling the shots and for that Suarez was grateful.  This is what a real alpha should be, not a bully with a higher than thou ego.  No, a real alpha takes charge and leads the team when it matters most.  A bit baffled at the revelation she couldn’t think on further as they both had work to do.  “I’ll get you all the help you need.”      


	5. Two Truths and a Lie

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After a long day cleaning up the mess Cage created, Lexa has to face her own guilt and Ontari.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Clark is NOT in good physical condition since surgery and he has been left in Ontari's care. Don't expect unicorns and rainbows.
> 
> BTW. We've written up through chp 12 and in it we found the first sex scene. I hope ya'll are Ranya fans. If you are, chp 12 will make you so very happy.

Agony tore through his chest as he woke in a pool of his sweat lethargic and confused.  The room was eerily dark and lonely, feeling the absences of his doctor for the first time since his captivity started.  Painfully aware that it was past the time for his medication,  the soreness in his chest vexed Clark with every breath he took, ‘Am I being punished?’ he wondered.   Clicking the lights on with the remote he tried to call for Lexa, but his throat stung too much from the previous surgery.  

  
  


‘Okay, what the fuck am I going to do?  What can I do?’  Clenching his teeth to bear through the throbbing pain, he trained his thoughts.  ‘If she is mad at me, she would have said something right?  She isn’t cruel, is she?  No, no, Clark don’t be a moron you barely know anything about her.’  Mentally slapping himself, he raised the bed feeling his weight shift in a blinding pain that squeezed a groan through his tight jaw.  

  
  


‘She’s always nice, but I overstepped with my words, and now she’s punishing me for it.’  

  
  


He squeezed his eyes shut forcing the pain into a manageable space remembering his mistake.  _ “Thank you for seeing me, the real me.” The wave of repulsion and frustration swept over Dr. Wood’s face and evaporated in the blink of an eye. If he had not seen it, he would not have believed it had been there. His happiness had nothing to do with her plan. He dropped to his knees purring and muttering thank you under his breath. Her reasons might be her own, but she had saved the tiny sliver of his soul that remained. She had his utmost gratitude. _

  
  


Surveying the room he noticed the glass of water left on the sliding table, ‘Great, now I am fucking thirsty too.’  He carefully rolled onto his side letting out a gasp as it felt like he was punched in the gut.  ‘Fuck.’  With a trembling stretch of his arm, he reached for the glass, straining against the threshold of pain as the simple attempt was more agonizing and taxing than anticipated.  Snapping his arm back onto the bed, the blonde seethed in frustration as silent tears stained the side of his face.

  
  


With a metallic click of the deadbolt the door opened to his room,  “Well, well, isn’t it the big bad wolf?”  That menacing voice was one he couldn’t forget. He shuddered from the remembrance of their last encounter.  “Or should I say the pathetic mutt as that’s all you are now.”  Stopping just short of the bed, Ontari plucked the glass from the table and took a sip. “Wouldn’t your mother be so proud. She tried to arrange our marriage. Our mothers thought we would be the ultimate power couple with amazing pups, God what a fucking joke that is.”

  
  


“Water. Please.”  His voice just shy of audible.

  
  


“I’m sorry, did you just say something?”  The brunette stepped closer mockingly placing her hand to her ear,  “You might want to speak a little louder.”

  
  


“Please, may I have a drink?”  He whispered plaintively through grit teeth.

  
  


“Of course, Clark.”  She said with sickeningly sweet tone.  Lowering the glass to his mouth she guided the straw close to his lips, but still out of reach.  “Come on. Where are your manners? You have to meet me halfway otherwise you don’t get any.”

  
  


He didn’t have the energy to glare, so he slid his face forward, but before he could clasp the straw with his lips, the brunette dragged the cup a little further from him.  “Looks like you misjudged the distance, come on Clarky you got this.”  Goading him, she continued to pull the drink away watching his painful struggle with cruel delight.  “Oh you almost got it that time, don’t give up.”  She stepped out of the way of his arm’s swipe smiling as he fell from the bed.  “Nice try, but you just didn’t want it bad enough.”  

  
  


Gasping and on the edge of vomiting, he still reached towards her pleading for a drink,  “No, I think we will try this again in a couple of hours as you seem to be disobeying the doctor’s orders.  Not suppose to be out of bed, Clark.  If I were you, I would get back into bed before Lexa gets back.”  She smugly stated before placing the glass on the table.  “Anyways, nice visit, but I must be going now.”  Flicking the lights off she left with almost a skip in her walk.  

  
  


Heading back into Lexa’s private study she woke the computer and turned the camera fed back on and placed her feet on the desk.  Ontari was slightly displeased she couldn’t hear the man’s sobs.  Yet she relished in the brief imagery she savored from moments ago.  “That’s right; you aren’t big or bad anymore.  Now you are like the rest of us, only less.”

  
  


***

  
  


Exhausted, Lexa wiped the sweat from her brow as she leaned against the door.  It had been hours of back to back work, a few field style surgeries and lots of physical examinations took its toll on her.  A firm hand on her shoulder snapped her from the brief rest,  “Doc, we can handle this from here.  For now, go home and rest.  I’ll come by for a few more questions, but I don’t believe you had any part in this.”  Suarez reassured with a gentle nod.

  
  


“I’ll come back or meet you at the station, my home is where I do my private practice for clientele that prefer secrecy.”  

  
  


“Of course, I’ll call you when I need you.  You did great work today. Many of Cage’s victims may not have made it if it wasn’t for you.”  Though absent of an apology, Lexa accepted the gratitude that was given.  

  
  


Peeling herself off the door, she headed to the showers to wash up before heading home.  Along the drive she allowed her mind to analyze the gory details of Dr. Wallace’s private project.  Again coming back to the question that had loomed over her while she worked through the mess of patients, ‘How could he have done this on his own?’  Cage was a halfway decent surgeon, and only by name held respect amongst their colleagues.  He wasn’t smart enough to come up with this on his own.  He had to have help, but she had no confirmation from Suarez that others weren’t involved.  

  
  


Pulling into her driveway she killed the engine and slammed her hands on the steering wheel,  “Fuck!”  Decompressing all of the madness that swirled around in her head she rested against the wheel.  “What the fuck?”  She growled as she tried to discern the differences between what he did and what she was doing with Clark.  It was one patient to his many victims, but up until now, that’s all Clark was right?  Not a victim, but a patient that she cared for even if the project started on the whim of a revenge-filled demand.  

  
  


She hadn’t locked him up in a small cage, nor did she allow herself to be reckless during the delicate procedures.  She even ensured the proper aftercare and treatment.  She fed him, bathed him, tended to him like a patient, right?  No, more like a pet as he was confined to a room, given treats and toys for his good behavior.  He would even greet her at the door to his room when he could after a long day at work.  Clark wasn’t anywhere close to being considered a victim of a deranged surgeon.  Lexa refused to believe that, but guilt had planted its seed, and now there was a conscious thought of morality to what she was doing with him.  

  
  


Entering her house, she found Ontari on the sofa in the living room, with a tablet propped on the end table streaming a live feed of Clark’s room.  Ontari woke from her nap at the sound of the door closing. The girl carelessly stretched upwards and let out a yawn,  “How did things go?”  The grog still fresh in her voice she inspected the disheveled doctor, already assuming the worst.

  
  


“It was a complete mess, too much to get into tonight.”  She dropped her keys into the glass dish by the door and stalked towards the kitchen in search of a drink to take the edge off.  “How’s Clark?”  

  
  


“Sleeping like a pup.  I haven’t heard a peep out of him, guess whatever you gave him was strong enough to knock out an elephant.”  Ontari answered casually, but her evil grin hinted at something else.

  
  


“Strange.”  She quietly said. Lexa’s skepticism increased while studying her assistant. She appeared too happy, even sated. “He didn’t need his meds?”  Lexa knew the length of the painkillers, which alarmed her.  Clark isn’t one to whine for his pills, but she had discovered his threshold for pain and the last surgery would have left him in agony without the proper care.

  
  


“Like I said he hasn’t been awake.  I figured if he needed anything he would have spoken up.”  Inwardly Ontari was smiling, but knew her fun was coming to an end.  Her boss watched as she lost her battle; her smirk fell into place.

  
  


Now Lexa was concerned, storming into the living room she grabbed the tablet and flicked on the volume.  Choked sobs could be heard beneath the static of the silent room,  “Dammit Ontari!”  She tossed the tablet at the young brunette and quickly bounded up the stairs. “Get out and leave the key. I can’t trust you anymore. You are no longer assisting with my patient.” 

  
  


“I didn’t know it had volume!” She continued to play dumb, but at the same time, she was disappointed. She didn’t think to check if there was sound. ‘Maybe next time I can listen to the delightful sounds of his pain. And, if I can’t when Lexa and mother begin their service I can hear it over and over again, one wretched alpha at time.’ She shrugged her shoulders knowing that she had to play nice now, so that she could be involved later. She gathered her things, closed the door and locked it. She tossed her key through the slot. ‘She’ll change her mind soon enough. The surgeries will require help. There is no one left to turn to for help.’

  
  


Making short work of the locks on the door, Lexa rushed inside the room and snapped on the lights.  Horrified by the sight of Clark curled up next to his bed, she slid to her knees beside him. “I’m so sorry.” The carefully crafted facade crumbled from her features as guilt and worry weaved its way through heart.  Pushing the mess of tangles from his face, she met his weary eyes that seemed distant as if he retreated inside himself.  “Clark, I’m sorry, this was never supposed to happen.”

  
  


At the sound of his name, cerulean blue twitched open as a weak smile graced his lips, “You're home.” Just like a puppy excited to see his master, Clark didn't think of himself, only of Lexa.  

  
  


“Oh, Clark.”  A somber breath of relief trickled from her mouth.  She collected her thoughts and assessed the visible damage, “I have to get you to the operating room, bear with me okay?” 

  
  


Following Lexa’s movements, he weakly wrapped his arms around her neck as she scooped him off the floor.  A painful hiss was all that came from him with the action, his body and mind were too exhausted to care.  “I know, just a little longer and I will be able to numb the pain.” Tenderly speaking she tried to soothe away some of the pain.  “Stay with me, okay?”  

  
  


Carrying him bridal style from the room she headed towards the back of the house where her private clinic was.  Her strength astounded Clark, but then again he knew his weight was vastly less than it had been since she had placed him on a special diet.  

 


	6. Ownership: A Beginner's Manual

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clark's position in Lexa's life complicates matters. Why does she care about his pain levels? Why does she miss him? And, then there's Nia...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When we first published, there was a lot of push-back from readers who did not know us and readily assumed that this story would be a standard F/M love story to make a mockery of the canon story. However, this is the story we had planned all along. The night I posted the first chapter, we had written through chapter 8. I was wondering if some of those that were so convinced we were out to destroy something beautiful could weigh in on this. Are we giving the ladies the consideration they deserve? 
> 
> BTW, Clark switches to Clarke somewhere around Chp. 12. Plus or minus one depending on how you define the change.

“Dr. Woods, Dr. Queen is waiting in your office. Detective Suarez should be here in twenty minutes to discuss proper protocols.” Ontari jogged alongside Dr. Woods as she left the boardroom and marched down the hall toward her large office.

  


Annoyed and tired Lexa stopped before opening the door. She paused before chastising her employee, “You know I do not want anyone in my office when I am not there. That includes your mother.” The girl bowed her head in acknowledgment, but the doctor knew better than to believe the behavior would change. Ontari’s respect for Dr. Wood’s paled in comparison to the fear she felt for her mother.

  


She sighed and entered her office. ‘I thought I told her not to meet me in my offices.’

  


“Greetings. You are late.” The regal statuesque blonde sat in the CEO’s chair drinking scotch from a tumbler looking out the side window.

  


“In order to be late one would have had to schedule a meeting. We didn’t. Now, I see you have made yourself at home in my office. Dr. Queen, our business arrangement does not entitle you to my office. We have an alliance, not a partnership.”

  


The older woman spun the chair to face forward. She put her palms flat on the desk before speaking. “Semantics. You are doing my bidding with amazing results. I would say we make a good team no matter how you label it. Your skills and my planning could bring down our world. Which reminds me, when will you be performing his final surgery so that I can take custody of the vile pup?” Her posture and tone left Lexa feeling like a scolded employee in her office.

  


“That’s not the deal we made. You wanted revenge for what he did to your daughter on my watch. It was my party at the club that led to them meeting. You asked for me to bring him down without killing him, make him hurt, humiliate him, make him not an alpha. I did all that.  He’s a trophy of sorts. Then you told me you wanted to go into business doing this for others. I don’t like it, but as you pointed out if I don’t help you will turn me in for how I helped Costia and failed. It would ruin my company, and I would lose my medical license.”

 

Lexa glared at Dr. Queen. “Weighing everything I have to lose, I agreed to help you selectively. But, you keep pushing and demanding. Nia, you can’t own me. You are making sure that I would go down and you could walk away. To make matters worse, you walk in here while the cops are picking apart one of our labs. Do you want their attention because I don’t.”

  


Nia’s sneer answered for her. She had always reviled Lexa. The abuse of her daughter and ensured that Ontari first was offered a job, and then set this awful plan in motion. Deep in her gut, Lexa suspected that there might be more to the story. Had Ontari known what would happen to her? Had Nia intentionally put her daughter in harm’s way? She had her suspicions, but no evidence as of yet.

 

“Why should I stick my neck out? I’m not the one who failed to protect my daughter. Nor, did I perform a sex change operation on the most powerful man in this city’s daughter to make him a son. And, then to hide the evidence since he died of heart failure on your operating table. Did you think no one would notice? My son helped hide your mess. Now, it’s time for us to teach the rest of those out of control alphas their place. I want you to finish Griffin and then pass him over so we can commission other work for you.”

 

Lexa straightened her suit jacket and squared her shoulders, “When we discussed this before you said Clark was mine. If I allow you access to demonstrate to customers what we offer you must keep in mind, I agreed to create visuals and maybe bringing him to a meet and greet with customers, but he is mine to do with as I will, not yours. Like that desk, that chair, and this office, Clark Griffin belongs to me down to his marrow. I don’t like what we are doing, but I can see from him that it might be necessary.”

  


Although Lexa’s voice never raised above the level of casual conversation, the exact enunciation exemplified her displeasure. “The thing you fail to understand is that you may have had the idea, but you cannot do any of it. You cannot change the identity of a being through creative surgery. Very few can. I can do things that quite literally no one else in the world can. I suggest you remember that.”

  


Dr. Queen stood from the chair and marched into Dr. Wood’s space; her voice increased in volume with proximity. “You are nothing without me. I supply the victims, the families and the financing. Do you think you could conceal our kidnapping scheme without the locals in my pocket?”

  


“Funny. You act like the plan was ever mine or even my choice. I don’t recall you allowing me to choose to be part of this, nor do I remember you doing anything to protect my interests when I acquired the first one that you selected. Clark stumbled into my custody before you offered any help so…”

  


Nia interrupted the angered doctor, “Ontari assisted you. My daughter follows my orders. You may be her boss, but I am her mother. She never fails to deliver on my demands.”

  


Again, doubt gnawed at Lexa’s bones. ‘Was Ontari a victim or did her mother create this scenario?’ Dr. Woods pushed past the psychiatrist, placing her briefcase on her desktop. “Funny. I believe that she failed to get Mr. Griffin to marry her. Isn’t that what started this whole thing? You wanted to force a marriage with a politically important family, but the son turned out to be damaged goods.”

  


The fury racing behind Nia’s eye confirmed that she had hit her mark.

  


***

  
  


_Clark clung to Lexa’s jacket, flinching with each purposeful step that sent thudding vibrations through his agonized body.  Being held so close, the intoxicating smell coming from the brunette served as a momentary distraction. He felt weak and pathetic, ashamed to be helpless in her lovely arms.  ‘Lovely?’  He snorted inwardly against another jolting string of pain._

  


_He buried his face in her chest to allow her scent to surround him; it provided a bone-deep comfort. He screwed his eyes shut begging the pain to subside.  Only a tiny mewl escaped with his breath.  He could hear the pounding of the woman’s heart, while her exterior remained composed an intense cadence play from the pumping muscle._

  


_Making it into the room, she rested Clark on his back over the examination table and went to the medicine cabinet.  Now wasn’t the time to decide what would work best, letting her intuition guide her she fetched the vial of diamorphine and syringe.  Drawing out the precise amount with steady hands, she quickly injected the opioid and watched as the pain drained away._

  


_She didn’t hesitate, once administering the painkiller she set to work inspecting the damage.  Opening his gown she could tell there was minimal tearing which would need to be re-sutured, but nothing drastic.  “I’m sorry for getting out of bed.”  He mumbled, catching the woman’s attention._

  


_Large tear-filled eyes conveyed his worry, “I was thirsty.”  His voice though weak, trembled with guilt making Lexa wonder if he was expecting to be scolded or punished._

  


_“I know, it’s okay.  Nothing beyond simple repairs.”  All emotion had checked itself at the door, as Dr. Woods returned to her normal bedside manners.  This was her patient, and there was nothing more to offer with fake pleasantries.  “I need you to relax so I can work.”  The doctor glimpsed a subtle flicker of sadness in his blue eyes before the lids closed bringing pause to Lexa’s clinical movements. She wanted to assure him, but what was there to say?  She swallowed back words before they could form,  ‘He’s just an experiment.’  She mentally reminded herself._

  


***

 

“Finish our prototype so that we can begin to advertise quietly. Griffin won’t be of use until the job is completed. Quit wasting our time.” Dr. Queen’s voice rose with her demand.

  


“In case you have failed to notice this, but my real occupation takes precedence. The fifth floor has been overtaken by a small contingent of the police department. In order for our little project to remain secret, I will have to wait until I quit being under nearly constant surveillance. Detective Suarez recapped my daily schedule to me only yesterday. Nia, it isn’t you in the crosshairs. It’s my life which means I get to decide when I proceed. Besides, Clark experienced a reaction to the anesthesia last time. We will have to wait for him to be healthier before we move forward or we won’t have a prototype.”

  


The two women were nose to nose on opposite sides of the desk. A loud knock at the door swept away the ebb and flow of anger that had been present for the last half hour. Both women took a cautious step back and eyed the door. Lexa motioned Nia toward it giving the woman a less than subtle hint that the meeting had concluded.

  


“Fine. We will work at your pace. But, I want more frequent updates. And, I want to see him very soon in person.”

  


Dr. Woods opened the door to determine who had the audacity to ignore her assistant and interrupt her meeting. She paled seeing Detective Suarez standing a few feet away with raised eyebrows. Opening the door wider for Dr. Queen’s exit, Lexa flashed a disarming smile. The flirty reddening in the detective’s cheeks tempered her nerves; a detective wouldn’t be coy for a suspect.

  


“Hey, I was wondering if you were ready for me to escort you to the holding unit. I know you’ve been great about working on them, but I can’t legally let you in and out without an escort.”

  


“Let me get my assistant my requests for the day and I will be ready to go.”

  


***

  


“Fuck me, that has to have been your 7th surgery today. The only person putting in the same number of hours as you is that trauma surgeon, Dr. Reyes, we borrowed from the ER at Polis General.”  Suarez said astonished by the endless stream of patients she had seen come through the doors since she arrived.  

  


“I had many more surgeries than that last night, and still more to come I assure you. But, I am thankful Dr. Reyes is handling the non-surgical needs. She’s been a lifesaver.”  Letting out a sigh the doctor took a seat on the lounger beside the detective.  “I am grateful for the extra hands. Otherwise, I wouldn’t be able to keep up.  There are two more waiting for this chat of ours to be finished.”

  


“I’ll be brief then. Cage is still out there, we have an APB on him and a BOLO, but I have a feeling someone said something to him.  There is no trace of him since before we found the lab.  Is there any place that you are aware of that he might go?”

  


“Honestly, I never paid him much mind, so I don’t know where he would go.  Trust me, if I can think of anything I will let you know, but right now I am more concerned about the mess he left behind.”

  


“I know, so in regards to what you can do to help us, we need your whereabouts on a few nights to clear your name.  It’s just procedure, and we don’t want to waste any more of your time.  So, if you could go through the list and get me witnesses to back up the nights if possible we can move on to other suspects.  He had help, and I am sure you figured that much out, so you can still be identified as an accomplice if we don’t take these steps..”

  


“Right, if you can send me an email I will make sure to do that when I get a breather.”

  


“Thank you, Doctor.  I’ll be in touch.”   

  


***

  


Lexa had returned home dead tired, but she needed to see her pup.  ‘My pup. Where did that come from? Is it because Nia demanded he is the first on the auction block? Or, is he my prize?’ All questions fell from her mind when the pained whimpering met her ears.  She found Clark laying fetally curled in the post-op room. Beads of sweat ran down the skin on his back and got lost in the minimal bedding; his golden hair fell over the edge of the bed in sensuous curls.

  


His I.V. hung empty. Lexa’s shoulders dropped. Ontari would no longer be allowed to care for the patient. Pain meds and a new bag of saline should have been administered several hours ago. Yet, his present condition denied the girl’s assistance.

  


“Don’t worry. This won’t happen again.”

  


Pushing his medication into the new I.V., she stroked his hair preparing to leave him for the night but his hand wrapped around her wrist. “Please stay.”

  


“Two of us wouldn’t fit in that bed.”

  


Clark’s released her knowing she denied his request. “Thank you for taking care of me,” he whispered. He listened to her receding footsteps. He held his tongue until she couldn’t hear his lamentable whining.

  


Hours passed, and an emptiness filled his bones, and the fatigue of pain overwhelmed his senses.

  


***

  


After eating a warm meal and a long hot shower, Lexa turned on the closed circuit camera to check on her patient. With his back still turned to the camera, she tried to convince herself he slept. But, the continuous small tremor through his torso told her otherwise.

  


Five minutes later Clark found himself at the foot of a California king bed covered with a warm blanket and a pillow.  ‘I’m just being cautious.  He needs to be monitored closely, and this is better than having to run down the hallway in the middle of the night if he gets worse.’  Lexa assured herself it was only a clinical decision that she moved her patient into her room.  

  


Studying his relaxed form she knew better than to assume it was a change in scenery that eased his pain, but she didn’t dare to think further about it.  ‘He’s a patient, my pet, but nothing more.’  And yet it was the soft whimpers from earlier that brought him to her room.  If he were just a patient, he would have been left where he was.  A pet, well that would make sense as he occupied only a tiny sliver of her bed with obvious boundaries in place.  The war of emotions was finally subsiding with acceptance of his place in her world.  ‘He’s my pet; I can care for him like this because of that reason.’

  


“Sleep my little pup. Tomorrow I will most likely move you back to your room.”

  


After the lights went out, he felt a hand delve into his hair to touch his back. Minutes later a quiet snore filled the air; it felt like home.

 


	7. Truths, Lies and Alliances

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clark is struggling with changes. Lexa is being watched. The plot thickens.

The temperature in the car dropped steadily the deeper night fell. Suarez debated running the engine for a few minutes to warm up, but the sound would draw attention to her presence. She doubted Lexa had noticed her tail that followed from work to home. Her promise to quit stalking Dr. Woods continued to be ignored. ‘There is something off about the doc.’ If asked, as she had frequently been by her superiors, she could not justify her gut feeling that the doctor did not add up; her willingness to help aside, the doctor’s close relationship with Dante Wallace raised more than one red flag.

  
  


Her own senses declared Dr. Woods to be an alpha, but there were days like today that the alpha went dormant. No signs of her emitting pheromones occurred even when challenged. One of Cage’s victims had knocked Dr. Woods into an examining table when she injected him with a sedative. Determined not to cause more pain, Lexa’s insistence on doing everything with care had put herself in harm’s way. The doctor should have emitted a demand for submission or maybe even a calming scent, but she had done neither. How odd.

  
  


‘I’ve never known an alpha that could work in a hostile environment like she has for days and not use her glands to stack the deck in her favor. I wonder if the rumors of what Dante did to her were true? Did the man experiment on her as a child? Did he damage her gland? If he did, then why was he a business partner? Having questioned Lexa’s assistant provided less clarity, not more. None of the facts provided by Ontari add up to the truth. She may have told a few secrets, but along with those secrets were lies and half-truths dressed up to confuse and manipulate. No, that interview and time had been virtually worthless other than discerning that Dr. Woods had a viper in her midst.’

  
  


Leaning forward toward the dash to pick up her thermos she caught sight of movement outside the Woods’ home. Abandoning her coffee for another time, she left the confines of her unmarked car and crept the grounds. The shadow she chased disappeared into the trees at the property line. The size and location of the footprints suggested to her that Cage had been there. And, he wanted into the doctor’s private offices.

  
  


A light went on in the house behind her. She caught a profile view of Lexa carrying a beautiful blonde woman up the stairs. ‘No wonder all our conversations have been flirty. She’s into women too.’ That idea’s twin quickly followed. She swallowed thickly as it dawned on her that the tubes that dangled from the carried figure indicated her lover was very ill. ‘Stress at work and home can’t be a haven. I would hate to be in that woman’s shoes. I would’ve never guessed that anything was wrong other than fatigue from all the surgeries.’ Bowing her head in self-recrimination, she vowed to make things easier for the two. No matter what they were battling, these women deserved more than to be harassed by an investigation that has nothing to do with them.

  
  


She turned. In her periphery, she saw the man observing her from under the foliage of the trees. He believed himself invisible, but he didn’t have her vision, his mistake.  She removed her phone from her breast pocket. She opened her camera app and adjusted the settings. Without a second thought, she photographed the stranger in the darkness. ‘He’s too tall to be Cage. So, why is he here?’

  
  
  


***

  
  


Roan Queen hid under cover of the trees. He watched the detective inspect his footprints. She followed his trek the grounds testing all the same windows and doors he had. They denied her entry as well.

  
  


He used his bluetooth headset to speak to his mother. “Mother. It’s done. The detective saw the whole thing. It is dark enough that she can’t see me. She must assume that I am Cage. However, she is not running after me. What would you like me to do?”

  
  


“If she isn’t following you, what is she doing?”

  
  


He lost track of his assignment for a moment when she bent down. He moved under the tree stumbling on unsteady ground. He hoped his distance masked his noise, then again getting caught wouldn’t necessarily be a bad thing.

  
  


“I think she is watching Lexa through the windows.”

  
  


“Good. Come home.” Roan visibly flinched from the cruel sound of his mother’s giddiness. Whatever she has planned for Woods, it would not be something she would like. Sliding through the darkness like a ghost, he dropped his business card into the driver’s seat of Dr. Woods’s car. ‘Mother may own me, but she doesn’t get to own everyone.’

  
  


Being honorable and dutiful used to mean the same thing when his father balanced out his mother’s domineering nature. But, his death two years ago sent her into overdrive. Ontari, his younger sister, dealt with it by becoming pathetic until an angry demon replaced her sweet nature. But, Roan, he had always been made to serve. Beta to the core. Roan’s father had given him one deathbed commandment: do not let your mother gain power. Her goal was not to bring down the alphas, but to own and control the whole world.

  
  


Heavy-hearted, the man evaporated into the shadows.

  
  


***

  
  


Lexa woke to faint purring. Light flooded in through the terrace windows. She rolled to her side and looked straight into content crystal blue eyes. She had arranged Clark at the foot of the bed and then lain down with her head nearest her patient; Lexa didn’t want to be side by side. She did not want to imply equality. She deemed the separation between them necessary, but Clark had ignored it. Clark’s body lay inches from her own, more space than she anticipated, but still too close.

  
  


“You moved.”

  
  


“I am sorry.  I was having a hard time getting comfortable.  I didn’t realize that I moved so much.”  Shying away from the doctor’s doubted-plagued quizzical view, Clark tried to retreat to his original spot.  The pain vibrated through his body turning his face red as his features screwed with the strain.

  
  


A war of thoughts fogged her mind, ‘I brought him here because I was concerned he would need me.’  Conflicted she let her guard slip,  “Clark, stop.”  His movements paused at the subtle command, but Lexa wasn’t sure what she was doing.  ‘He is only doing what is in his newfound nature.  Seeking care and affection is normal for a pet, right?’  

  
  


“It’s okay; I shouldn’t have pushed your boundaries. I know better.”  

  
  


“Clark, just relax until I get back with your meds.”  Sliding out from under the covers, she avoided eye contact with him and set her mind to work.  Before reaching the door she could hear him shuffling again and turned back to see Clark working his way to the foot of the bed,  “I said, don’t move.”  She growled the command and watched his body tense.  “Lay down and stay put.”  Watching his body relax in place she felt a tinge of excitement course through her body,  ‘Did he just submit?’  Shaking the preposterous notion from her mind, she exited.

  
  


Minutes later she reemerged with a tray of food, including Clark’s daily medication.  He was right where she left him contently sleeping, however, the blonde was now snuggling her pillow.  A curious brow raised at the sight, noticing the flush in his skin it seemed as if he was inhaling her scent.  Impossible, but then again it could be that he likes the smell of her shampoo or bodywash.  Again she calmed the quandary of thoughts building in her head and donned her professional veneer.  

  
  


Occupying the space next to him, she rested the tray in her lap; her fingers found purchase in the wild tangles of blonde hair.  Gently she scratched his scalp stirring him awake,  “I’ve got your breakfast.”  His soft purr registered her soothing attention as he pressed into the pleasant strokes.

  
  


“I’m sorry. Please don’t be mad at me.”  He whimpered softly.

  
  


“Clark, I’m not mad.  More surprised if anything.”

  
  


“It’s not about earlier. It’s about now.  I can’t help it. Your smell is just so…” His words trailed off as he buried his face in her pillow. “...intoxicating.” The words slipped out though muffled.

  
  


“What are you talking about?”  

  
  


“I’ve never smelled anything like it before.”  He let out a heady breath as his hips pressed into the bed.  

  
  


Alerted to what Clark was saying her hand immediately grasped a fist full of hair,  “Clark, you are hallucinating.  I have no smell.  You’re rutting, and you don’t have anyone else but me to obsess over.”  Shocked by the revelation, she was unsure if she had been giving him enough hormones to counteract his primal urges.  Until his procedures were complete, there was always a possibility he would hit his rut beforehand, but she had anticipated it.  The hormones were supposed to deal with this, but at this moment it was clear they weren’t.    

  
  


Another grind of his hips into the mattress tug against her hold,  “No, your scent is real.  It’s minute but all over the place.  I can’t get enough of it.”  His lust clouded mind was obviously imagining things.  Any scent Lexa had, was nothing but chemical compounds meant to impose her dominance.  Dante and she never achieved anywhere close to creating something that would appeal to a mate.  This was all in his head.  Right?

  
  


“Sit up.”  With a sharp pull, she guided him up on his knees.  Her eyes caught a quick glance at the bulge straining under his gown eliciting a disgusted grunt from the doctor’s lips.  Blown pupils were glossed over with his uncontrollable arousal, as his lips trembled to speak.  “No Clark.  Take your medicine. Then, you are going back to your room.”

  
  


“Please, no.”  He weakly quivered.  “I need you inside of me.  I- Lexa please, I need you.”  

  
  


“Take your medicine, Clark.”  She growled again this time forcing the pills into his hand.  His head pulled back exposing his throat begging for her attention, but with a cruel hold, she forced him to focus on her command.  Tossing the pills into his mouth, he choked them down in a dry gulp.  “Good boy.”  Releasing her hold she moved the tray out of her way and stood.  “Time to go back to your room.”  She snapped her fingers ordering him to follow her. 

  
  


***

  
  


The detective sauntered down the center aisle to the squad room before addressing the group. “I know many of you have called me crazy and obsessive because I continued to monitor Dr. Woods’s home, but this photograph is a game changer.”

  
  


A blurry and dark photograph filled the screen. “Using our experts and their software, the enhanced image looks like this.”

  
  


A lone man stood watching. “Facial recognition software identified him as Roan Queen. If you remember Nia Queen that had been removed from the suspect list early on as we could not connect her with Cage Wallace. She does directly connect with Dr. Woods as well, her daughter Ontari is Woods assistant.”

  
  


Suarez posted an image of all 3 Queens meeting in a parking lot. Ontari and Nia’s face glowed with happiness, but Roan looked petulantly off into the distance.  “I’ve done some digging. Dr. Nia Queen has been under investigation for many forms of malpractice and one attempted kidnapping. All have been dismissed due to political pressure of one form or another. I believe if we follow these three we will locate Cage Wallace.”


	8. Decisions and Discussions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There are a few important discussion to be had. We find out a little bit more about where Lexa's head is and has been. And, Raven makes more of an appearance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope this explains a little more about what is going on with the ladies. I know I am delivering little nuggets of information at a time. If you are confused by anything, please don't hesitate to ask. Sometimes I write things in my head and forget to put them on the page. Thanks for reading.

After another long day of corrective surgeries, Lexa’s body protested on her way to see Clark. Detective Suarez’s behavior had bothered her all day. The woman had been over accommodating and considerate, two things the officer had failed to be to this point. If anyone in her staff had behaved that way, they would have been put on leave or fired. Woods could not help but wonder what inspired the change in attitude.

  
  


Watching Clark through the mirrored glass, she noticed the lightness to his movements as he moved to his recliner. The pain in his movements remained, but with every surgery, he brightened, appeared happier. Yet, the events of the morning plagued her mind as they had all day. ‘Why is he rutting so early? He should require long-term exposure to a strong alpha for that to happen. Is it because his mother had him repeatedly injected with a synthetic alpha enhancer? God, to use a banned medication on your son--Like I have any room to speak on abusing people, especially Clark.’ Lexa shook off the spiral in her thoughts.

  
  


Putting her worries out of mind she opened the door to his room. Clark instantly tried to get back up.

  
  


“Don’t. Stay seated.” Her orders gave no room for dispute.

  
  


He ducked his head in obedience. “May I speak?”

  
  


The tremulous quaver to his voice bothered her. “Yes.”

  
  


Pale blue eyes darted up to meet her own. “I want to apologize about this morning. I was out of line. I should not have made demands on my alpha.”

  
  


Lexa growled. “I have not claimed you. I am not your alpha. But, I accept. You have no right to demand anything of me. Now, relax. I must check your bandages and then we need to talk.”

  
  


She pushed his hair aside and untied his gown allowing it to fall off his narrowing shoulders. His skin flushed crimson at her touch. “Sorry.”

  
  


“It’s a natural response to blush, Clark. I am not offended.”

  
  


Pink-cheeked, he stared at the wall over her shoulder waiting for the examination to end. 

  
  


“How’s your pain level?”

  
  


“Manageable, but I still can’t paint or draw. My arm movements irritate the sutures. Do you want to tell me what has your mind spinning? I can tell it’s about me.”

  
  
  


Lexa sighed and rolled her eyes. Standing back up and towering over him, “I have a decision to make, but maybe I should include you on this one. Understand this is not about whether or not I am going to do the surgery; it’s about the timetable, the when. The next surgery makes all the others seem small and easy. It will require a long time lying still in a bed. You will have to participate in the healing process, and I can’t let Ontari assist with caring for you any longer. She’s counter-productive. You would be further healed by now if she had done everything she was directed to do.”

  
  


“Are you talking about vaginoplasty?” Clark’s eyes had widened. A mild tinge of fear curled around his words.

  
  


“Yes. I had hoped to be further along in this process with you, but life keeps getting more complicated. And, I fear that if we don’t do it soon, my efforts will be put on hold for me.”  Lexa tiredly rubbed her face with her hand. “My work offices are under investigation due to a soon to be ex-colleague. But, I think that has put my home under surveillance. I’m fairly certain you’ve been seen.”

  
  


Lexa let her words sink under his skin. “I need to know, are you ready for the surgery now or should this wait what could turn into months if we aren’t careful?”

  
  


Clark gulped for air as his head spun from what he’d heard. Fear pulled at the muscles in his throat as he spoke. “Don’t let them take me away.” He pushed himself out of his chair, walked over to his bed and crawled under the blankets. “I would rather sooner than later. I’m familiar with the procedure. I knew who and what I was, but my mother won’t accept it. If they take me out of here before you finish, I will never get to be me. I don’t think I could live with that.” 

  
  


Lexa nodded and then placed a soothing hand on Clark’s head. ‘The silkiness of his curls always calms me. No, her curls. Clark has already made this clear; she wants the surgery. She deserves the surgery for all the pain he caused. Now she can make up for what he was.’

  
  


The doctor’s brows furrowed. ‘I need to add someone else into the loop on this one. Ontari can’t be near her. It’d be a disaster.’

  
  


***

 

Dr. Woods tried to appear calm as she waited in the booth at the back of the Italian restaurant. Earlier today while Dr. Reyes assisted her with one of the last of Cage’s victims, her compassionate insistence that a boy’s life would be worthless if they did not do their utmost to save his arm, had impressed her. When she invited Dr. Raven Reyes to lunch, it had been on a whim after working together for days on end. Although months ago, they had spoken over the phone about Clark, neither woman had broached the subject while working together. Lexa was unsure whether Reyes even remembered the conversation.

  
  


The sound of sneakers squeaking across the tile floor drew Lexa’s attention up towards the disheveled latina.  Wearing a thick tan wool peacoat with her scrubs underneath Raven looked worse for wear with dark circles around her eyes.  Both women were a reflection of the toll the previous days had taken on them.  “Hey, you wanted to talk?”  She dropped into the opposite side of the booth with her hands still buried in her pockets ready for this chat to be finished before it got started.

  
  


“Can I get you anything?”  The waiter asked as he strolled over from another table.

  
  


“Coffee.”  Both replied in sync.

  
  


“Okay, I’ll be back with a fresh pot then.”  He nearly rolled his eyes, but remained professional and left.

  
  


“So, I am guessing from your countless volunteer hours to help these victims that you work how and when you want. Is that correct?”

  
  


Reyes scoffed, “Please, like you did anything different. Yes, it was one of your business associates that created the mess, but you didn’t have to clean it up. You also didn’t have to pay for each one of them to receive the care that they did. So, what’s this really about?”

 

Woods superficial smile turned into a calculated smirk daring Raven to react rudely, “What are your thoughts on Clark?”  Getting straight to the point, she knew both of them didn’t have the time to mince words.

  
  


“Other than him being a pompous prick that plays the victim whenever he hurts someone?” Raven’s words were much too sharp, but then again the words felt more rehearsed than believed.  

 

The rough attitude melted off her face slowly. “That isn’t entirely true. Damn it. I know he isn’t like that on purpose.”  She corrected herself.  “He’s been chemically altered to behave like that.  Finn always said Clark has never fit in the world and was forced to conform. Finn knew him better than I do. I’d say he deserves to continue to suffer his mother’s cruelty, but--”  She let out an exhausted sigh, “He tortures himself far worse than that woman ever has.”

  
  


Was it exhaustion speaking or did Dr. Reyes finally find some sort of forgiveness?  Lexa couldn’t be sure as she knew just as well how the days bled together leaving little fight left in her mind.  “You’ve always helped him clean up the messes, why?”

  
  


“I did it for them, not him.” Raven shrugged her soldiers. “The women, they are so pitiful. I couldn’t let them suffer that way.”

  
  


Lexa nodded. “I’ve had access to some of his records. If you hate him so much, why did you save him? What about the third attempt, the one last year?  Weren’t you the Doctor who saved his life after he swallowed a pill bottle full of Oxies?”

  
  


“I was just the doctor on shift that night.” The crack in her voice confirmed that though her words held anger, sympathy bubbled beneath the surface.

  
  


“So what about the attempt before then?  The one off the record that says you had a John Doe in your care?”

  
  


“What are you getting at?”  Annoyed Raven let out a low growl.

  
  


“I think you care about him more than you let on.  Pity him maybe?”

  
  


“What does it matter?  Listen, I have had a long couple of days.  Can we just hurry up here?”

  
  


“It would be easier to show you if you can spare an hour.”  Cautious with her words she knew better than to say more especially with the investigation still going on around her.  “I promise it’ll only be an hour.” 

  
  


***

  
  


Dr. Woods led the way up to Clark’s room; his muffled groans permeated the door.  Thinking back to earlier, she knew it could be a mix of pain and his rut which had her detouring to her study.  “Have a seat, I have some files I would like you to look over first.”  Lexa took her seat at her desk and fished the folders from a locked drawer.  “You were the one who knew about the injections first, about the illegal synthetic alphastat being administered to Clark to modify his behavior, right?”

  
  


“Yes, but it’s not like I could stop it from happening.”

  
  


“Not blaming you, I am well aware that Clark’s mother is at fault and that she could easily ruin anyone that spoke out about it.”  She slid the folders over to Reyes,  “I suspect that even with how much you wanted to hate him, you just couldn’t.  Finn was an accident, but the girls were not.  Though Clark is only partially to blame, it’s his mother who ruined those girls by proxy.  It was her will that created this monster inside him, and it’s been my expertise that has been working to remove it.”

  
  


Wide eyes poured over the charts and pictures, “You’ve been doing this to him?”  There was a slight edge of disgust to her tone.

 

“We both know that  _ she _ prefers it this way.  If I had known the whole truth from the beginning, I wouldn’t have been so careful. Clark would be whole, and the monster gone.  Instead, Clark has had to endure unnecessary cruelty from a very sadistic assistant.  Ontari.”

  
  


“You let that bitch near him?!”  

  
  


“Do I need to reiterate?”  Lexa raised a brow almost as if in a challenge.  “She’s no longer part of this experiment, and that is why I brought you here.  Dr. Reyes, I need your help.  No, Clark needs your help. And, I don’t know who else I can trust with this. Clark wants this, needs this. How many doctors and nurses here would run to Abby? How much more would rather Clark suffer?”

  
  


Raven sat in bewilderment, unsure what to say or do.  She was angry to find out that Ontari managed to worm her way back into Clark’s life but more frustrated that Lexa made the unethical choice to operate on a patient without their consent.  A click of the remote turned on the flat screen displaying a slender blonde curled on her side.  “Clark’s rut started, she’s in pain, and Ontari’s sabotage has derailed much of the work.  She’s suffered enough to last two lifetimes, please consider her in your decision and get back to me soon.”

  
  


“I’ll help you.  After the crap that Cage pulled, I am not about to let the same happen to Clark.  If he-- she wants to continue that is.”

  
  


“I’m nothing like Dr. Wallace, though the intention was wrong from the beginning, I want to ensure Clark gets the best care and what she wants.”   

  
  


“How do you know this is what  _ she  _ wants and needs? How do we know that this is what’s best for Clark?”

  
  


Dr. Woods, tired from the discussion dropped her reading glasses on the table and appraised her guest one more time. “How well do you know Dr. Griffin?”

  
  


Raven’s eyes glowed with sadness few could understand, but Lexa understood it for what it was. She felt the same way about Dante Wallace’s secret lab at the Mount Weather Facility.

  
  


“I know she’s stubborn and doesn’t see her child clearly. She makes demands that he, I mean she can’t deliver.”

  
  


Lexa pulled open a drawer and dropped a brown accordion folder on the desk. “Before I started down this path, I had made mistakes with someone I cared about. and it gave Nia Queen leverage. It brought me to this situation, but even if I hadn’t been here Clark’s life was hell.” She opened a file folder and let Dr. Reyes read the details, and then, examined the photographs.

  
  


“Oh, God. She allowed someone to try to graft a portion of a known alpha’s gland to her own child’s to make him an alpha.”

  
  


“From the photographs, it appears they tried many times. I think Clark went under the knife at Mount Weather ten to fifteen times starting before puberty.”

  
  


Lexa walked over to the credenza to pour both of them some scotch to allow Raven time to process the thought. “Clark’s not responsible for any of his bad behavior is he?”

  
  


Dr. Woods shrugged and carried their glasses over. “He should carry some blame, but I think _she_ will be a new creature. It will be up to her to choose to be better. If you do help us, you will get to see the Clark Griffin that I have. She’s a beautiful creature; and, she’s an incredibly submissive omega.”

 


	9. Clarifications and Misinterpretations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Suarez and her partner connect Cage and the Queens. Clark's losing hope. Lexa is losing her patience until clarity sets in. Poor Clark. Life will be better soon...but not this chapter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Merry Xmas to all who celebrate. Happy Holidays to everyone else. I hope all of you have a lovely time with those that you love. My first Christmas without dad is feeling off and unfestive. Just can't find the spirit. Faking it for the kids.
> 
> This chapter ends on a down note, but life will take a positive turn in the very near future for our favorite people.

Suarez studied the timeline. She had compared all the suspects to the times matching kidnappings and disappearances. Whether she wanted to see it or not, Dr. Woods schedule implicated her in several of the missing persons cases. Clark Griffin’s file sat open on her desk. Her investigation to find this missing elite scumbag had saved so many poor kids that Cage Wallace had been using for guinea pigs, but the more Suarez looked into his colleague’s activities, the more she wondered could Dr. Woods be behind all of it. The woman appeared compassionate. She had donated time, money and services to care for all of the abuse victims, but was it real or a diversion?

  
  


“Hey, Frank. Get in here.”

  
  


The detective’s new partner sprinted into the small interrogation room she had used to think through the possibilities. She looked at the ex-football player and hoped that his size wasn’t his best attribute. 

  
  


He flopped in the chair across from her wearing the same hopeful expression found on puppies at the pound.

  
  


“What did you find for me?”

  
  


“Um. Coffee?”

  
  


Her irritated sigh rattled him. “I’ll get you that coffee and my file. I did make some calls. Be right back.”

  
  


She watched the supposedly grown man practically scurry from her sight returning with a cookie stuffed in his mouth file folder and an empty hand. Totally ignoring the fact that he had offered coffee and then forgotten to bring it, she read over his elegantly written notes. Bewildered by his penmanship, she looked up. “Ok. So, I know you spoke to the list. Who do you think we should focus our investigation on?”

  
  


He nervously rubbed at his crew cut and took the cookie out of his mouth. “Um. I think the whole Queen family has something to hide. I know you just wanted me to look into the mother, but both those kids are shady too. Dr. Woods may be in on it, or she might be an unhappy accomplice.”

  
  


Suarez could not prevent her eyebrows from raising; she had thought the same. “Why do you say that? And, you do know that unhappy or not an accomplice is breaking the lawl with what they’ve been up to.” 

  
  


He took a large bite and shrugged. He began talking with his mouth full. “I never would have looked twice at Nia Queen if it hadn’t been for Roan. You had asked me to look into any connection between Ontari and Cage. I did some digging and found that before Mount Weather’s Medical Research Facility closed, Cage had taken over for his father doing things that are still whispered about in certain circles. Rumor has it that he harvested the glands from dead alphas and spliced it with those of young omegas trying to create alphas out of them. Roan Queen interned at the facility. He testified against Cage to save his own ass back in the day.”

  
  


Suarez started to speak and then stopped. “Why was Cage able to conduct research. He should have been in jail.”

  
  


“Daddy had deep pockets is the best explanation I’ve heard.” Frank shrugged. In his world, money opens any door. 

  
  


“That helps, but that only connects Roan to Cage. Ontari and her mother are not part of that.”  Suarez wondered why evil appeared to be a genetic trait to some.

  
  


Shoving the last of the cookie into his mouth, Frank licked the chocolate from his fingers before flipping through the file until he found the paper he wanted.

  
  


“Here it is.” The patient manifest document from five years ago had two separate names of interest: Clark Griffin, the missing alpha and his assigned psychologist from Mount Weather, Dr. Nia Queen.

  
  


***

  
  


It had been a long, confusing couple of weeks, between the potent painkillers and exhaustion Clark couldn’t be sure how long he had been sleeping.  His nose would always alert him to Lexa’s presence, but strangely he would recognize a familiar scent from his youth.  It was apparent Ontari was no longer assisting with his care, but he wasn’t sure who this other person was.  Too out of it to give a damn, he would only put the effort forward when Lexa was in the room.

  
  


“Clark, how are you feeling today?”  In his groggy haze, he felt the twitch of his ear-catching Lexa’s voice.

  
  


“Alive, here.”  His tone far more sardonic than intended, but frustration was taking its toll.  

  
  


The clack of footsteps approaching him caught his attention, yet with the previous events still playing out in his head, he refused to move.  “What’s gotten into you?  The attitude isn’t your norm, and you’ve barely moved.”

  
  


“Like it matters.”  He grumbled between his tense jaw.  Probing fingers buried themselves into the thick locks trying to coax more of an answer from him.  A low irritated growl vibrated from his chest as an antagonizing bite of nails ran across his scalp. “How about you finish your rounds and leave me alone.”

  
  


Raising a brow in a query, she thought silently to herself for a moment before addressing him,  “You don’t tell me what to do.”  Instantly as if reacting to a threat in the room his body shivered under her grasp before relaxing against her hold.  Mentally noting the change, she chalked it up to his condition.  “Much better.  Now, tell me, on the scale how is your pain today?”

  
  


“Seven.”  

  
  


“How long has it been at a seven?”

  
  


“Well if I had a clock I could be specific.”  The temporary restraint he had quickly evaporated.

  
  


Agitated by Clark’s arrogance she fought to keep her composure, but even then her grip tightened as her body on its own accord postured,  “How long Clark?”

  
  


“A few hours maybe?”  His voice was weak,  “Please I just want to be left alone.”

  
  


Releasing him, she spoke no more and completed her task. Once administering his painkillers had been finished, she left the room in silence.  Something was off, and she knew it.  His sweet demeanor was withering away.  Resting at her desk, she watched the feed from Clark’s room unsurprised to see him in the same position.  On further viewing, she noticed the slight tremor along his shoulder and flicked on the sound.  A soft whimper registered over the static,  “Always a disappointment. No one is ever going to want me.”  He repeated over and over again between breaths.  He curled into himself further trembling until the effects of the medication kicked in.

  
  


Lexa felt an uncomfortable urge to go to his room, not sure why or what she would do there the doctor slumped back into her chair.  “What am I going to do with you?”  She wondered aloud.

  
  


Collecting her phone from her desk, she tapped on the touchscreen keys,  “Seems we are going to have to have this meeting sooner than later.”  Speaking more to herself than her compatriot a thread of guilt coiled inside her.  Raven was specific in her boundaries, but seeing Clark’s fixation was continuing to grow in an unhealthy manner she needed the latina’s presence to balance him.  Though something about that thought bothered her alpha, the faint echo of its growl lingered in her skull. 'Mine.'  Wasn’t he supposed to be her pet?  Isn’t this counter-intuitive to her plans?  Allowing another to interact with him left her feeling something, but what?  

  
  


Ignoring his soft cries she turned off the tv and focused on the files in front of her.  There was a great amount of work she needed to prepare for and none of it was going to be easy.  Convincing a carefully selected staff to remain silent about the person they would be working wasn’t going to be easy.  Money spoke volumes and so did the promise of flourishing careers.  Abby would destroy her if she ever knew what she had done to the woman’s progeny.  

  
  


***

  
  


_ “Dr. Griffin, what you are asking me to do goes against ethics.  I need your word that Ontari will be his mate otherwise this deal is off.” _

  
  


_ “Clark can be stubborn, but I am sure with Ontari playing her part correctly the two will be mated before the end of this year.  Besides you’ve ensure her scent will appeal to him, once she’s pregnant he will have to do the honorable thing and marry her.” _

  
  


_ “You’ll force it otherwise?” _

  
  


_ “You know I stick by my word. It still means something.  Besides Ontari is a perfect match for my Clark.  Their pups would be superior to those before them.  A perfect genetic match ensures one of them will end up an alpha prime.  Just think if we could synthesize a prime’s glands.” _

  
  


_ “Here I thought you were just a cardiologist.” _

  
  


_ “Better to be a cardiologist than specialize in a field deemed unethical.  All of my funding and credibility would be stripped from me.  Besides I am not the only one hiding behind a title, psychiatry?  Really?  At least I know my speciality, Dr. Queen.” _

  
  


_ “You’d be surprised just how handy that has been for me.  No one believes in therapy, but psychiatry requires an actual education.  If I deem someone as insane, there isn’t a second thought to locking the individual away.  It’s a shame you didn’t tell me Jake was ill.  I could have helped you with him.”  _

  
  
  


***

  
  


Frank kicked the door open carrying in a pizza with a huge grin on his face. “I read through Ontari’s file. Her part-time job working for Dr. Woods came about from a direct request from Cage. And, I found these too.” He dropped a few printed newspaper pages onto the table top. Two of the images had both Clark Griffin and Ontari Queen; one appeared to be them on a date, the other was a group shot from a social event.

  
  


“Have you been reading the society pages?” Taking a bite of her pizza, Suarez covered her surprise and how impressed she was that he had looked. She had felt it would be a waste of her time, yet the evidence suggests that it would have paid off. 

  
  


His finger tapped the image from the party. “You missed the best part. Look at the date. This is the last time Clark Griffin was seen before his mother reported him missing.” He let that soak in for a second. “And, I almost missed this, but look right here.”

  
  


Suarez glanced at the paragraph describing the image. “Holy shit. That was Dr. Woods’s party they were attending.”

  
  


Frank sat back in his seat smugly grinning. “I take it that I did good?”

  
  


Suarez took another bite of her pizza and then wiped her hands on a napkin. She nodded. “How about we drop in to visit Woods this evening and see what we can find out about that party?”

  
  


***

 

The door was left open, with only the dreamy like echo of a call,  “Clark?”  Not the voice he was used to, but still familiar.  

  
  


“I’ll grab him. We’ll meet you downstairs.”  Lexa’s voice was clear as day, but he didn’t want to move.  “Hey, I know you’re tired--”  The tender touch long absent since the morning before (Not like he was keeping track) stirred him further awake.  “I want you to come meet someone.”  Caressing his wild tresses, she toyed with the strands,  “Come on, sit up.”  She encouraged. 

  
  


Blue eyes blinked open as Clark worked through the stiffness to sit up. An uncomfortable feeling Lexa could not name clawed at her as she noticed how dull and lifeless eyes avoided hers. 

  
  


“Come on, Clark. I need you to be presentable. Let’s get you dressed so we can go over to the main house for dinner.”

  
  


His shoulders slumped as he went through the motions dressing himself. A full-length mirror had been installed weeks ago so that he could enjoy looking at the changes made to his body, yet he avoided his reflection. A disquieting worry soared threw her insides as he chose to put on slacks instead of a dress. Leaving his chest wrapping in place, he slipped a soft sweater on and used his fingers to neaten his hair. Clark made no noises as he went about his tasks efficiently. He brushed his hair and teeth in his little en suite and then returned to slip on shoes.

  
  


“I’m ready.” His voice rasped in little more than a whisper.

  
  


“Clark, what’s wrong?”

  
  


He continued to stare at the floor and chewed on his lower lip. 

  
  


“Answer me.”

  
  


“It doesn’t matter, does it? Let’s go meet whoever it is you want to pawn me off on. I get it. I do. I wasn’t good enough for my mother. I was vile to my friends, and now that you know, you can’t get away from me fast enough. It’s okay. Whoever would want a freak like me anyway?”


	10. Learning to Trust

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lexa and Clark start to discuss who they are to one another only to be interrupted multiple times. Suarez and Raven see what Lexa is too blind to see.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since I didn't publish for 5 days straight, I thought I should push another one out. I will warn you, things have to get a little tougher before they get better for CLEXA.

Suarez and her partner stood outside of Dr. Woods’s front door. Shaking her head at the noob’s nervous excitement, she decided she had better throw water on his zealotry before he got them into trouble.

  
  


“Ok. Frank. Let me take the lead. We don’t have a warrant. She will know that. We are here to observe and ask questions as informally as possible. I want you to see if you can take a look around on the inside while I talk to her. Got it?”

  
  


He visibly deflated. “Got it, boss.”

  
  


When the door opened, the detective examined the quiet blonde in front of them. She flashed her badge and spoke.“I am Detective Suarez. This is my partner, Frank. We are here to speak to Dr. Woods.” Though she did not look sickly, she lacked the vigor most healthy people had. ‘This must be the woman she carried up the stairs that night.”

  
  


“This way.”

  
  


Clark closed the door behind them and led them deeper into the house where Dr. Woods and Dr. Reyes sat together at a large table with stacks of documentation.

  
  


“Hello, detectives. I wasn’t expecting guests this evening.” Lexa’s eyes widened in confusion. ‘How did I miss the doorbell?’

  
  


“We’re sorry to intrude. But, we have a few more questions we would like to ask. Could you and this beautiful woman, what was your name again meet with ?”

  
  


Annoyed, Clark offered his hand, “Clark Griffin.”

  
  


Dr. Woods and Dr. Reyes watched in horror as Clark identified himself. The three of them had been steadily planning his upcoming vaginoplasty that would occur in a few days. Both women had assumed he knew to give an alias if for no other reason than to prevent a delay in his dreams. But then again, Clark had been not himself since Lexa had directed him to dress and join them for a planning session for his aftercare.

  
  


“Nice try. Clark’s not a girl.” Suarez’s neck whipped around to stare at her companion in horror.

  
  


“Funny. I’ve spent my whole life trying to convince people that I am a girl. I get boobs, and suddenly I can’t convince people I’m me.” A defeated Clark walked away from the other to sit alone by the window wiping his eyes as he went.

  
  


The brown haired detective whacked her partner’s arm. “Frank, I think it would be for the best if you went and sat in the car.”

  
  


Chagrined and pinking around the ears he gave a brief nod and left the room.

  
  


An awkward silence filled the room. Suarez cleared her throat and looked at Clark weighing the possible reception of an apology. Lexa pushed back from the table. Her quick gait led her around the corner and pushing past Suarez to calm her patient. Apologetic chocolate eyes met disconcerted green. All was not well in the house.

  
  


“He didn’t”

  
  


“Give them a minute.” Reyes cut through the excuse and pointed to the opposite chair. “She’s had a rough time of it. Imagine having a mother that demanded you be the big bad alpha son and knowing that deep inside you are a girl. I don’t know if you ever met mama bear Griffin, but let me clarify death would be an easier road than the one she’s had to try to walk alone.”

  
  


Suarez turned to look at the far side of the room again. Lexa perched on the edge of Clark’s chair scratching her nails along his scalp whispering what she assumed were words of comfort.

  
  


“Frank’s new, but I can’t say that I reacted differently. However, I knew better than to say it.”

  
  


***

 

_ “Clark, what’s wrong?” _

  
  


_ He continued to stare at the floor and chewed on his lower lip.  _

  
  


_ “Answer me.” _

  
  


_ “It doesn’t matter does it. Let’s go meet whoever it is you want to pawn me off on. I get it. I do. I wasn’t good enough for my mother. I was vile to my friends, and now that you know, you can’t get away from me fast enough. It’s okay. Whoever would want a freak like me anyway?” _

  
  


_ Clark felt his alpha approach, but he recoiled. His thoughts continued to spiral downward. ‘If this is as bad as I think it is, she won’t have to do the next surgery. Who am I kidding? This is a colossal waste of her time.’ _

  
  


_ “We don’t have time for this. Our guest is waiting.” An edge to her words  _ drew Clark out of his thoughts.  _ “We will not keep her waiting. Now, follow me.” _

  
  


_ He acknowledged the order by following it, occasionally brushing away a rebellious tear. ‘I bet I can pick the locks on the medicine cabinet after bedtime tonight. I don’t have to keep living this way. She shouldn’t have…’’ _

  
  


_ “Hey, Clark.” A voice he had not expected to hear again greeted him. _

  
  


_ “Raven, what are you doing here?” _

  
  


_ “Seriously?  I have been following you around cleaning up after you, and you assume I wouldn’t be here now to continue the same task?”  Raising a skeptical brow, she wore her best mask letting the questions sink in before letting Clark off the hook.  “Clark, I don’t hate you.  Never able to.  I was mad, furious, but never once did I find the ability to hate you.”    Cautiously she approached the blonde unsure if he-- she believed the spoken truth.   _

  
  


_ Lips quivering, Clark buried his face into the crook of Reyes’s neck as his arms wrapped around her in a weak hold.  Still feeling the burn from his tender chest he couldn't care less, there was finally some closure between the two, and it was the good kind.  “Finn was special to both of us. I am so sorry.  He--” _

 

_ “Was always chasing his next adrenaline rush and fate caught up with him.”  She embraced the blonde gently,  “You didn’t kill him, no more blaming yourself.”   _

  
  


_ Another unwanted sensation of feeling tightened around her heart, ‘Clark forgives her just like that?’  Clearing her throat, Lexa made her uncomfortable presence known.  “We have work to do.”  A tinge of irritation laced with the words.  “Clark, unless you intend on spending the day in the medical room I would recommend removing yourself before you damage any more of my delicate work.”  It wasn’t until he released his hold on the brunette that she felt the tension ease in her chest.  Her pet’s  eye roll wasn’t missed, but Lexa chose to ignore it for now.  His behavior was odd and almost becoming an annoyance.  She couldn’t figure out what parked itself under Clark’s skin, yet she knew it had to do with her. _

  
  


_ “Raven has agreed to help me with the care going forward and assist in the procedures.  I expect you to understand that whatever friendship there was between you two is on the backburner, you are a patient, and that’s her first priority.”  Another eye roll and shrug from the blonde,  “We’ve come too far for making mistakes, bonds need to be limited.  I don’t want any emotions following us into the operating room.” _

  
  


_ “Sure, whatever.”   Clark backed away fighting the impulse to find his place beside Lexa.  ‘Bringing Raven here wasn’t to rekindle a near lifeless friendship, just another person to use against me.’   _

  
  


_ “If you want to continue to act like a petulant child then I can put you back in your room.”  Narrowing her eyes the color flashed red for a split second as her tone scolded him.  Lowering his head, he avoided her gaze,  “Now we need to discuss a few things and plan.  I brought you down here so you can be included.  Dr. Reyes and I have come up with a timeline and want your input.” _

  
  


***

 

“Clark, I don’t understand what’s wrong.  I get that you are upset about something and I am not sure what.”  Her fingers continued to play across his scalp.

  
  


‘That smell again.’  His eyes slowly closed as he relaxed into her touch, soothing lavender and ylang-ylang with a touch of vanilla.  “You don’t want me.”  Breathing the words his tone was soft.  “No one wants me.”

  
  


“I’ve never said I wanted or not wanted you.”

  
  


“Maybe not with words, but definitely with actions.  I’m so close to being me and so far from being wanted that I don’t know why I should continue.”

  
  


Briefly contemplating she carefully dissected his statement,  “If you are speaking about my repulsion to your rut, it has nothing to do with you. I feared that you were fixating on me because I am all you have been exposed to for the last handful of months.  And--”

  
  


“After you are done with me I am going to be thrown out like yesterday’s trash.”

  
  


“No, you aren’t going anywhere.”  She snapped back almost defensively.

  
  


“So you are basically locking me away in that room as what a prisoner?”  

  
  


“Not a prisoner. It's too dangerous for you to leave here especially if your mother finds out what we have been doing.”

  
  


The smell evaporated instantly, and his calm demeanor became rigid,  “Just like everyone else you are going to cower away from my mother.  If being me means being locked up and hidden from the world I would rather you kill me now.”  He attempted to stand, but it was low growl from Lexa’s throat that held him in place.  “I don’t want to live a life of solitude.  If being the real me means I lose any chance of having someone in my life that loves me for me then I give up.”

  
  


“Hey, I hate to interrupt, but the detective is getting a bit antsy. Do you mind putting whatever it is on hold?”  Raven tried to be careful with her approach worried about the scent pouring off the other doctor.  Normally, she wouldn’t dare approach an alpha that was asserting their dominance, but she had to risk the potential backlash.  

  
  


Clark shied away as Lexa jerked herself away from the chair,  “Detective, care to explain the intrusion?”  Unknowingly she stormed up Suarez who instantly bared her neck.

  
  


“Dr. Woods, I mean no harm, I was merely following up to finish my report.”

  
  


“As you can tell, my hands are full and again my time is precious so explain to me what exactly do you need since I already sent over my whereabouts for the dates you specified.”  Everything about the Doctor, her voice, her stance, her scent said provoking her could turn lethal.

  
  


“Mind you I am on official business and would like to leave here in one piece.” ‘Woods’s scent burned in her nostrils; bile rose in her throat. ‘The rumors that Dante Wallace had damaged her are definitely false.’

  
  


“The clock is ticking, speak or get out.” A growl followed by a howl rung inside Lexa’s head. For the first time in her life, Dr. Woods fought to keep her alpha in check. Her beast had always remained dormant no matter what provocation occurred. Unsure of the cause, Woods questioned her body’s responses to Clark’s distress.

  
  


“Considering my line of questioning centered around Clark’s disappearance I am wondering if you would let him-- her speak about what happened on the night of your party?”  Carefully she asked the question hoping to get the blonde’s input. 

  
  


The revelation that Clark was here and nearly unrecognizable left much up for discussion, but navigating the minefield of an on edge alpha wouldn’t be easy.  Conjecture and half-truths filled her missing person’s report. Her instincts said that these two were more than patient and doctor.  The candid moment she witnessed several nights ago set the precedent of some physical involvement.  

  
  


The despair coursing through Griffin’s veins proved either Woods rejected her affections or chose to be ignorant.  ‘Clark is grasping at air; Lexa is too dense to see Griffin’s need. Even without Clark’s scent, her desperate hopelessness worries me.’

  
  


Lexa looked down at Clark and then back at Suarez. “You didn’t know Clark was here, so he isn’t why you came. But, if he wants to answer. He can do whatever he wishes.”

  
  


Clark closed his eyes and swallowed. “The party. I got blackout drunk. I left with Ontari Queen, and I marked her like I did all too many others on previous occasions. Dr. Reyes fixed her like she did the others. If not, my mother probably handled it. I don’t remember much, but this is what I know from the morning after. I met Dr. Woods that day. I began transitioning. The end. If Ontari wants to press charges, I won’t contest them. I’m not important to anyone anyway. Mom might fight my incarceration, but I won’t. Trading one prison for another isn’t difficult.”

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	11. Lack of Confidence

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clark let's the reader into what's happening in her head.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I should say that this could be triggering, but the whole story can be triggering. Make of it what you will. I will also state for the record that sexy-times kick in next chapter. It just won't be CLEXA yet. They are both about a celibate as it gets still.

“You need to get your head out of your ass. Clark’s going to self-destruct if you don’t treat her a little better. She wants to submit to you. Do you have any idea how amazing that is?” Dr. Reyes’ glared across the table at Dr. Woods. Clark left for her private quarters shortly after Suarez departure. The few details the two doctors wanted her input for were either handled or dismissed by the blonde.

  
  


“He’s fine.” Woods knew Clark suffered, but had no idea how to correct the situation. After sifting through as many expert texts on the subject as she could find, clarity on why Clark’s rut appeared early eluded her. An older text suggested that true mates triggered rut, as would an alpha prime. Clark had not been exposed to either, so what else could it be. 

  
  


“ _ She _ is not fine. Your wolf knows it. I know it. And, somewhere deep inside you do too. The changes to Clark’s body will be immensely painful. You know that, but all she’s going to be able to do is lie there and think. Whatever is causing her emotional upheaval is only going to get worse. You’ve seen the scars. You know where this path leads. I’ve seen Clark at his worst. When he believed no one cared he opened every vein he could. He needs more from you.”

  
  


“Raven, I swear you have as little confidence in me as the board does.”

  
  


_ Dr. Lexa Woods stormed into the conference room barely containing her anger. “What is the meaning of this?” _

  
  


_ All the board members faced the door, but none looked concerned in the least.  _

  
  


_ Nathan Miller leaned back in his chair and cleared his throat. “We are pleased you could make the meeting. In between your constant liasing with the local police department, and all the free medical care you have given away, we did not expect you to find the time to do your actual job.” Miller’s alpha spewed dominating musk into the room. She had believed this alpha understood her position, but the tactics he’s using to get her attention angered her wolf. _

  
  


_ In the past when her alpha had not raised his head, she had produced the synthetic scents Dante had created for her. None of them knew of her change in status. Her alpha growled. Clark had been the first to notice that she inevitably gave off a scent when challenged now, but the board experienced the wolf’s quick fury. Rage commanded their obedience as the air in the conference room choked everyone’s senses. “I’m the CEO. I decide what my priorities are, not you.” _

  
  


_ Miller ignored his desire to submit while all the others offered their necks or went to their knees. “Say what you will, but your decisions have been putting the company second. For the first time in your years in control, your reports have been late three times in as many weeks. You’ve missed countless meetings with all of our in-house projects. We need you to get someone else you trust to share your duties. The company cannot continue without its leader.” _

  
  


_ Dr. Woods took her chair. “Is that how all of you feel?” Her wolf, though challenged, recognized the validity of the criticism and quelled its anger. _

  
  


_ “Yes.” Again, Miller remained the sole voice for the group. His strength surprised her. _

  
  


_ “Do you have any demands or recommendations?” She growled out the words as her body calmed. _

  
  


_ “Those were our demands. However, if you want a recommendation your cousin, Anya served in your place last year when you were overseeing production in our German facility. She may not be a doctor, but her business instincts are unparalleled.” _

  
  


_ Lexa’s smiled, feral but genuine. “I will see if I can get her to move up from our legal division. She’s often claimed that she didn’t like to be in that much authority, but I would not mind making her either my second or the CFO. I will extend the offer.” _

  
  


_ She poured a glass of water and took a long sip. “Gentlemen, I want to thank you. When I came through those doors, I believed you had staged a coup in hopes of ending my leadership. I see now that I misjudged. Mr. Miller, you will have a bonus for having the nerve to speak to me with authority, but you held me accountable for my failings. I need people working with me who have the ability to do that. This company is only as strong as its leadership makes it. If you we cannot correct each other, or fix our mistakes we will fail. Have a good evening gentlemen. I will let you know about Anya within the next few days. Meeting adjourned.” _

  
  


***

 

Raven and Lexa’s voices drowned out slowly as Clark made her way back to her room. Feeling empty and alone, she opened her door to be met with the painting of her what she had once believed to be her true self. But, the truth has its way of making itself known. She could never be that beautiful. 

  
  


She traced the image with her fingers, memorizing the detail. Wrapping her fingers around the wooden edges that stretched the canvas, she picked up her painting and brought it down harshly over her knee shattering the stretchers. 

  
  


The wood tore the edge of the canvas, but the damage was not large enough. She stuck a finger in the hole drawing it downward ripping the canvas from top to bottom. 

  
  


Seeing her work disappear eased the ache in her chest. She grabbed the smaller bits of canvas and continued to rip. Painting by painting, drawing by drawing she left none untouched. When none were left, she scooped the remains in the trashcan ignoring the burning muscle and sinew in her chest. Numb. Tired. Clark sat in the dark waiting to feel anything.

  
  
  


***

 

“Good afternoon, Clark.” Raven greeted carrying in a tray of food. “We need you to eat. Tomorrow’s surgery will mean that your body needs strength and energy to repair itself.

  
  


Clark turned her vision away from the window and onto the tray of food. “I’m not hungry.”

  
  


Raven sat down next to her friend. “Hey. You haven’t eaten much in days. You have to eat for this to happen.”

  
  


“So what? Are you done or do you need to force the spoon into my mouth before you leave? Why do you even care?”

  
  


Narrowing her eyes at the frail-looking blonde Raven wasn’t sure what she could say.  Clark was losing hope, Lexa was too stubborn to do anything about it.  Any words out of her mouth would be meaningless to her friend, but there was one thought or rather a person that came to mind that knew how to speak to Clark.  “Finn, he cared.  He knew you, and right now he would be disappointed to see you moping around over some girl when you are so close to being the real you.  I think you are putting too much emphasis on Dr. Woods and not seeing the value in yourself.”

  
  


Clark nodded. “You would bring Finn into this. Dr. Woods is just one in a long line of people that have seen through all my bullshit and no I am useless. Mom, dad, Murphy, every teacher I ever had, Jaha, Wells. You know as well as I do all those omegas that went home with me only saw the money in my pockets. I will inherit the Griffin fortune. Can’t wait for them to realize dad gambled it all away a decade ago. Mom’s money is the only thing keeping the lights on or at least that was true when I came here. I bet it hasn’t changed.”

  
  


Rolling her eyes, she fought to keep her tone even, “Are you that daft that you can’t see what’s within your reach?  Seriously, you have to be you and love yourself first before having anyone else in your life.  Finn would beat the crap out of you for being so simple-minded.  Love or lust or whatever the fuck it is going on between Dr. Woods and you isn’t important, only you are.”

  
  


Clark looked at the food on the tray. “Cheeseburger and fries. You remembered.”

  
  


“With bacon.”

  
  


Snatching a fry and tossing it back. “I’m still pissed that you slept with my mother. You know she was just using you.” Clark deflected the conversation away from the topic that made his bones ache. The salt from the fries awakened his hunger. He picked up the burger and took a large bite.

  
  


“You have seen your mother, right? Even the Archbishop of Canterbury would tap that if he had the chance.”

  
  


“Do you think this surgery will help? At first, when I realized what she had done for me I was thrilled. Dr. Lexa Woods had looked at me and seen a beautiful woman. And, then one day I knew that she hadn’t. She made a beautiful woman where none had existed. She didn’t see the one locked inside of me. She could have built her out of anyone; I happened to be the lump of clay she chose. There wasn’t anything more to it than that.”

  
  


“Whatever her reasoning or goals were it’s like fate happened for you.  I don’t condone what she has done because it’s unethical for a doctor to perform surgeries on anyone without consent, but she did right by you and has seen past her previous ambitions and wants to help you.” 

  
  


“You know it’s easy to tell the ugly duckling that one day they will be a swan when you have never been ugly. You have no idea how much faith you are asking me to have. I am only an experiment. I am not a person. As much as I want to believe that she wants to help me, I know that I don’t matter. She still even uses ‘he’ when she talks about me doesn’t she?”

  
  


Raven’s facial expressions did not hide her disappointment. She expected more from Lexa, but the doctor’s moral compass had been malfunctioning for too long for this to be an easy path. “True and that’s not an easy switch for people used to seeing you as ‘Clark.’  I have my suspicions that she may be trying to distance herself.  The speech about emotions in the operating room?”  She raised a brow in question at her blonde friend.

  
  


“She made me a woman, and she struggles? You have got to be kidding me. I can call myself Clarke and wear only dresses and put on makeup and style my hair, but at the end of the day when the lights are turned low, and she sees me she still sees a man. I want to be with her because of her beauty, intelligence, and kindness. You ought to see how beautiful she is when she falls asleep at her desk in my room, but the truth is no matter how much I care about her it’s one-sided. That speech about the O.R. was just to mollify the pet project. I’m fairly certain that once the surgery is done and I have healed, I will be removed from her life. She doesn’t even spend time with me anymore. I wonder if she plans to give me to Ontari to use as she pleases?”

  
  


Reyes visibly trembled with anger. “I will not let that bitch anywhere near you.”  Growling she was already angry that Ontari had any part in Clark’s life.  “Listen, you need to live life for you and accept that things don’t always work out the way we want or plan.”  Tears formed at the thought of Finn.  “You know if you were born this way it wouldn’t be the same?  This is a test, only the strongest can endure something like this, and if you weren’t put into the wrong body, you would never discover who you actually are.  I can’t wait to meet the real you.”

  
  


Clark swallowed another bite. “If Lexa won’t keep me, will you help me go somewhere far away from her?. If I can’t be with her, I need to be somewhere that no one knows my family. I can start over. Who knows maybe someday someone will look at me and think she should be mine and mean it. If I stay here, and she finds someone else no one will find my body until there is no blood left. I won’t make that mistake again. Next time I check out for good.”  

  
  


The dark-haired doctor swallowed thickly. Vivid images of her dear friend after the last suicide attempt laying on her exam table leaped to mind. “Clarke, if I have to put on a mustache and whatever type of disguise to disappear with you I will.  Mind you I am not sure how I would feel about it, but I would do that for you.  I am not about to put all this effort into helping you just to lose you.  Dr. Woods is a moron when it comes seeing what she has in front of her.  For fuck sake, she has basically crafted you into the image she wanted.”

  
  


“But, she doesn’t want me. Ironic isn’t it?” Sadness and longing pulled Clarke’s voice into a squeaky rasp.

  
  


“We don’t know what’s going on in that thick skull of hers.  I have my own assumptions, but you are my number one.  I won’t allow her to hurt you and if she doesn’t want to acknowledge whether or not there is something there between you two, I will make sure to protect you from any harm.  Even if it means forcing her to tell you something you don’t want to hear.  You don’t need to be dragged along if there isn’t anything there and she needs to be clear about her intentions and feelings.”

  
  


“I know you are helping with the surgery tomorrow. Will you be here when I wake up? If she won’t be, could you?  I hate waking to an empty room.”

  
  


“Absolutely, Clarke I am here for you.  Not her and that’s that.”


	12. The Anya Effect

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We learn a little about what is going on in Lexa's mind. Clarke is struggling. And Anya has a combustible first meeting with Raven. NSFW.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We finally arrived at a sex scene. Who knew it would take this long? Who doesn't love Ranya?

Lexa wiped a tear as she put her Ipad down. Clark’s responses to her attentions earlier had mystified her. Yes, she had pushed him away during his rut, but his attitude change spoke of a larger problem. Listening to the tail end of Raven’s talk with Clark she realized she had unintentionally hurt the omega to a depth that may permanently hinder their relationship. Clark had always been beautiful; she had only enhanced what he had been given. And, his happiness in the changes brought a glow to his skin that no one could manufacture. She shook off her worry for another day. She would go into the operating theater rested and mentally prepared. The emotions Clark brought forth had to wait until another day.

  
  


She and Raven set up the OR for the morning and each headed to bed. But, like so many other nights Lexa strayed through to Clark’s room. At the very least if she could not look on the woman, she could enjoy the images the blonde had created. 

  
  


She entered the room without a sound. Using the light from her phone, she probed the edges of the wall to find her favorite works only to find a blank wall. Perplexed and annoyed, Lexa crept further into the workspace approaching the now empty easel. ‘Why would he move them and where?’ As she skirted the edge of the desk she had often used, she found the trash can overflowing with scraps of canvas and paper.

  
  


“Oh, Clark, what have you done?” Overcome with loss, Lexa sat at the desk attempting to decipher where it all went wrong. They had been so happy in their companionable silence. Why did Clark want something they could not have?

  
  


‘As artists love their creations, I love Clark, not as a man, not as a woman, but my creation. Right?’

  
  


Glassy-eyed and shaken, Lexa peered at her omega in a fetal ball whimpering in his sleep. As she had done hundreds of times, her hand sought blonde curls, but guilt stayed her hand. 

  
  


“Goodnight, sweet prince. And flights of angels sing thee to rest.” 

  
  


***

  
  


Although Raven had offered, Lexa chose to sit beside Clarke while his, no her anesthesia wore off. Fear churned in the doctor’s heart as she remembered the last time when heroic measures had to be used to keep the omega alive.

  
  


She traced from her hairline to her nose. Clarke’s face had lost all its masculinity quickly once she had shaved the sharpness off his jawline, her jawline. Lexa shook her head in irritation. Clarke’s accusation had hurt, but the blonde’s feeling had been valid. ‘How could I spend so much time creating this beautiful woman yet I insisted on using male pronouns. I know better than that.  I’ll make things right.’

  
  


A gentle flicker of Clarke’s eyes drew the Doctor from her thoughts.  Grasping the blonde’s hand she knew instinctively Clarke would attempt to move,  “Relax, everything was a success.”  Instantly Clarke’s hand withdrew from her grasp.  

  
  


“Where’s Raven?”  The question was dulled by the hoarseness of her dry throat.

  
  


She wasn’t surprised to hear Dr. Reyes’s name, but the sharp tug in her chest caught her off guard.  “How’s your pain level?”  Deflecting, she resorted to her professional demeanor.

  
  


“Raven?”  Clarke repeated weakly.

  
  


“We’ll start with something a little stronger than before. I don’t want you experiencing any discomfort.  Remember to tell me if you start to have breakthrough pain as your tolerance will continue to change.”  She again ignored Clarke’s question, almost irritated to hear Dr. Reyes’s name mentioned a second time something inside her wished it was her own name that escaped the blonde’s lips.  Administering the new mix of medication, she ran her fingers through the golden tangles.  A soft mewl was all Clarke could muster before dozing off again in the chemical haze.  “We’ll try again later.”  She mused before resting back in her chair.

  
  


***

  
  


Standing at the gate she felt slightly awkward holding up a sign, ‘I’m not a goddamn chauffeur.’  Yet today she was, all of her schooling, and hours poured over journals and books she had been demoted to something that took no skill.

  
  


As the passengers poured from the terminal exit, she was left wondering who she was picking up.  A muscular yet slender woman marched forward with her duffle bag slung over her shoulder.  “So Lexa is too busy to pick me up?”  The woman was not at all what Raven had imagined. She wasn’t wearing anything that resembled business casual:  jeans, tank top, and a jacket.  Her long hair pulled into a lazy ponytail allowed an unobstructed view of the makeupless face.  Oriental, but there were slight traces of other ethnicities hidden amongst her features.  

  
  


“Do you have a staring problem or are your eyes always like that?”  Her tone wasn’t sarcastic more like teasing, but cautious. 

  
  


“Sorry, uh the car’s this way.”  The woman’s smell was intoxicating, she could barely think beyond the haze.  The heat was already building between her thighs, and she had a long drive back to the house.  A small space with just her and the-- ‘Oh my god, she’s an alpha.’  Internalizing the discovery, she began fixating on the drive ahead.  The street names, landmarks, speed traps, and anything else to keep her mind busy and arousal in check.

  
  


“So I am gonna assume this door opens itself?”  Anya stood on the passenger side waiting for the brunette to pick her jaw up from the ground.

  
  


“Please forgive me. I’ll get that for you.”  She struggled to get the keys from her pocket and leaned towards the door.  

  
  


With a long drag of air Anya took in the latina’s scent and smirked watching as she fought to contain herself,  “Need some help?”  She asked almost in a teasing tone watching the woman tense.

  
  


“No, I’m good, thanks.”  

  
  


“Are you sure?”

  
  


“Yep.”

  
  


“Okay, but I am pretty sure this is a keyless entry setup.”  Her lips were dangerously close to Raven’s ear as warmth rolled down her neck eliciting an almost mute moan from the brunette.  Reaching around the obviously flustered woman, Anya decided to test her boundaries and snaked her hand between Raven’s trapped arm and her side.  Grabbing the handle the door instantly unlocked with a mocking click as she chuckled softly enjoying the mess she was creating.

  
  


“I knew that.”  Raven nearly stumbled over her own feet as she quickly slipped out from between the car and Anya retreating to the other side.  Pausing she caught her breath and steeled herself before getting in.  Anya was watching her every move with a sly tormenting smirk, and it only aggravated the throbbing need at the latina’s center.  

  
  


Going through the street names for the 20th time in her mind she remained silent as her passenger scanned the messages on her phone.  ‘So this is what awkward silence sounds like.’  She noted wondering if the open windows helped to vent out the desperate scent of sex.  

  
  


As if Anya was reading her mind she rested a hand on the driver’s thigh but remained attached to her phone.  ‘Oh god, she knows.’  Stifling the surprised gasp, she choked on the ball of nerves that was wedged in her throat.  Reyes tried to ignore the hot hand on her thigh, intently staring at the traffic ahead she nearly rammed into a car that braked quickly trying to squeeze into the exit lane.

  
  


“Mind pulling off the freeway?  Before we get killed, please.”  Her eyes never left her phone, but the order was irrefutable.   

  
  


Dreading the sound of the engine fading she tentatively turned towards the alpha,  “Sorry--”  Her words were cut off by a dominating kiss that she happily fell victim to.  Fingers buried into the silk locks grasping the mess in a tight hold. Raven didn’t care as she tasted every millimeter of the alpha’s tongue.

  
  


A gentle but firm pull parted the two,  “Get in the back seat.”  A lustful growl echoed from the alpha’s throat.  Silently she opened the door and stepped out leaving Raven to contemplate the message.  She leaned against the back passenger door wondering how long it would take for Reyes to obey the command.  The movement in the car was frantic, and she couldn’t help chuckle at the image playing out in her mind.

  
  


As the shifting subsided, she licked her lips and wiped the remaining residue from her bottom lip with the pad of her thumb.  Causally opening the door, she found her mouth salivating at the sight of the body laid out before her.  Reyes had removed her pants and left her soaked panties on for the alpha to remove.  “I hope I didn’t misinterpret your message.”  She shyly stammered.

  
  


“Too smart to misinterpret anything dear doctor.”  Climbing in, she closed the door behind her and crawled on top of the brunette.  Pressing the stiff bulge into the wet fabric covered center, she captured Raven lips again.  Grinding hard into quivering the mess, Anya enjoyed the feeling of nails tearing at her shirt.  A long roll of her hips had panting pleas streaming from the doctor’s lips, and Anya happily swallowed each and every one of them.    

  
  


Her fingers ripped off the underwear in a quick motion and leaned back on her knees.  The swollen folds glistened with want and begged for attention.  When she dipped down to taste the sweet nectar, a hand shoved her back,  “Oh no you don’t.  We don’t have time for foreplay.”

  
  


“As you wish, boss lady.”  She winked and unbuttoned her jeans allowing the lengthy member to fall free.  Raven quirked a brow wondering if Anya preferred to go commando, but didn’t have time to think more about it as the woman climbed forward.  Tracing the length of the doctor’s slick slit with the tip she nearly came undone with the low, pleased moan that escaped her partner.  Painfully swollen and begging to be squeezed empty she was satisfied with the amount of natural lubricant and lined herself up.  The head breached the tight ring of muscle eliciting a throaty growl from her lips as she eased herself inside the velvety warm slickness.

  
  


“I am not some delicate flower, get to work or we stop now,”  Raven growled out, her fingertips finding purchase on the firm round ass pulling her counterpart closer.  “Fuck me.”  She demanded.

  
  


Anya slammed the thick lengthy member deep into the clamping muscle; she let out a grunt before pulling back and sheathing herself fully again.  “Do not knot me or I will cut your dick off.”

  
  


“Only when you beg for it mutt.”  She panted as she thrust deeper into the tight wet heat.  Finding a rhythm, she pumped harder drawing out sharp gasps of air from the latina. Each pulse of pleasure tugged at her dick promising to milk her for all of its worth forcing a painful urge to knot.  Beating a hard rhythm against the sweet spot she was lost to her partner’s demands.  Her hips moved relentlessly until they built to a climax that drew them both over the edge.  Gasping for breath, she felt the doctor’s walls choke the last of her seed free before relaxing.

  
  


“I need a moment to compose myself, mind getting off me and cleaning yourself up?”  Already shoving the alpha off of her she was reaching for her medical kit. The bag held all she needed.

  
  


“Right, but before I leave ya to clean up, could I at least get your name?”

  
  


Raven eyed the beautiful alpha leaning inside the door. As she pulled her pants up and over her hips, she watched the woman enjoy the movements. “You can call me sexy as fuck, but in public, Dr. Raven Reyes will do. Now, get the fuck back in the front seat so we can get back on the road.”

  
  
  
  
  



	13. Lexa, What Did You Do?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke's anguish reaches its zenith. Lexa's starts to put the pieces together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I decided to ring in the new year for everyone by making sure we had hit the moment that things start to get a lot better for Clarke.

_ Three Days Later _

  
  


Lexa yawned as she exited Clarke’s room and headed for the kitchen. Clark slept soundly in her drug-induced haze. She missed seeing crystal blue eyes shining in the darkness. Once or twice the doctor had been sure that her patient feigned sleep rather than speaking to her. In her breast her wolf snapped and paced, dissatisfied and alone. Heavenly smells wafted her way as she opened the door. Having Anya here eased the emptiness that had taken up residence inside her.

  
  


“Shit. Could you two stop it?” Red-cheeked and annoyed, Lexa walked over to the stove and flipped the overly crisp bacon. Anya laughed as she tucked a semi-naked Raven beneath her chin. The latina sat on the edge of the cabinet with her bare legs wrapped around Lexa’s cousin.

  
  


“Good morning, Dr. Woods.” Raven giggled.

  
  


Lexa huffed. “It’s too early for you two to be this gross. Raven, I’d appreciate it if you wore more than a half-shirt and panties to breakfast.” She turned her glare on her cousin. “I can’t believe you were thinking about taking her on my kitchen cabinet. I eat here.”

  
  


“I was about to have a delicious breakfast. And, I like her lack of clothing.”

  
  


Lexa rolled her eyes and removed the bacon from the flame. “Did you toast the bagels yet?” The words had barely fallen from her lips when she heard the toaster pop. “Nevermind.”

  
  


“I think someone’s frustrated. Lex, she will come around, but you are going to have to make the first move. Right, Rave?”

  
  


The scents her cousin created rolled Lexa’s stomach. The two claimed to be friends with benefits, but the giggles and horny teenager act discredited those claims. She piled a few pieces of bacon and a bagel on her plate. “I think I will eat elsewhere. The smell has to be better somewhere in this house. I would like to go to work at least once this week without smelling like sex.” She poured a cup of coffee as she finished her complaint.

  
  


Raven raised an eyebrow. “I think your issue is that it that it doesn’t smell like you are the one getting some. Anyone that isn’t noseblind can tell that this lovely smell isn’t you.”

  
  


Welling from the depths of her chest, an uncontrolled growl fell from her lips surprising all three women. Anya moved toward Lexa leaving the beta on the cabinet behind her. Her instincts decided to protect her mate even if they pretended to be casual.

  
  


“Sorry, Woods. I overstepped.” 

  
  


Lexa waved off the beta with the hand that held her coffee sloshing a little over the side. “It’s okay, Reyes. I’m not myself.”

  
  


“True. Your scent is changing. Your subconscious has decided Clarke is yours whether you have or not. My alpha hits a wall of aggression anytime I enter the corridor leading to the recovery rooms. I am curious how your alpha is going to react when she is well enough to be moved into one of the mansion rooms.”

  
  


Lexa shook her head. “Clarke’s room is on the other end of my private facility.”

  
  


Anya arched an eyebrow at her. “Do you honestly believe your alpha will be happy with her that far away? When was the last time you slept the entire night in your bed without going to spend an hour or two to watch her sleep? I bet it started before this surgery, maybe even before the previous one.”

  
  


The blush that traveled up Lexa’s neck answered for her. 

  
  


“Months maybe?”

  
  


Anya did not like watching Lexa diminish. “Hey. I’m not making fun of you. I’m glad someone makes you want to protect them. I’ve never seen your alpha declare its territory until this one. How many women have you had affairs with over the years, but no one has ever triggered you. Maybe, Clarke is more than a patient. Think about it. Would it really hurt to move her into your home and share a little bit of your life?”

  
  


Raven sighed. “She’s been sharing her life with Clark. But, both of them are too stupid to see it. And, I’m not afraid to say it. I may be a beta, but we are supposed to be your support system, the backup. In the last few weeks, you’ve become my friend. I think it's safe to say that you have done amazing things for Clarke. Things that you and I know she needed. I will forever be in your debt for that. But, I hate seeing how your stubbornness is destroying two people I love very much. Sort your shit, Woods.”

  
  


She popped Anya on the ass as she walked past the two alphas. “Gotta go shower for work. Do you want to help me conserve water?” She added a little extra swing to her hips on the way out of the room.

  
  


“You don't have to conserve water, just say what you mean Reyes.” Growling her frustration, Lexa visibly clenched her jaw, and tension coiled throughout her body.  As if it wasn't already clear, Raven was flaunting what she had, and that made this whole conversation even worse than it had been.

  
  


“Cuz, you need to get laid before you murder someone.  Just fucking get over yourself and like Rave said 'sort your shit.’  Besides water conservation is important for the planet.  Can't argue with that logic.” She said chasing after her beta.

  
  


Squeezing the life out of the mug in her hand, she managed to shatter it, spilling it’s burning contents all over the knuckles of her hand,  “FOR FUCK SAKE!”  

  
  


***

  
  


Heading to her study, she locked the door behind her and opened the window to vent fresh air into the room.  Turning on the flat screen, she turned towards her computer and pulled up a few emails, sorting through the bulk quickly.  In between messages, she would find herself glancing up at the screen hoping to see some sort of life from the blonde, but nothing changed.  

  
  


‘Come on Clarke. I know you aren’t sleeping.  Just do something.’  She ruminated on the fond memories of the blonde’s creative vision that led to beautiful landscapes and fantasy style worlds that would leave the viewer in awe.  She missed seeing Clarke’s self-portraits and ached for her to reach for the new brushes and paints she left for her.

 

Clarke wasn’t her mate, no, just a pet that needed reminding of her master’s love.  She felt her wolf snort its irritation, but she didn’t linger on the subject as Raven and Anya had entered the blonde’s room.  Instantly Clarke came to life, though there wasn’t any exuberance to her,  just an empty shell moving on command.

  
  


The annoying feeling she couldn’t place returned to her chest as she watched Clarke interact with the pair, but it was when Anya neared the blonde that anger boiled over.  ‘Mine’.  She clenched her jaw to the point that her teeth threatened to cave under the pressure.  When Anya placed a delicate kiss on Clarke’s hand, all bets were off.  Her wolf broke loose from its cage and forced Lexa to move.

  
  


Fumbling with the lock on the door she nearly destroyed the barrier, but managed to control some of her sensibility and twisted the metal knob until it snapped off its base.  With a shove, the door swung open and smacked hard against the wall.  Not caring to check the damaged she stomped briskly down to the private facility steaming along the way.  Her wolf seething over the smell and sights from this morning, ‘Not my Clarke, you will not have her too.’  Rational thinking was vacant only impulsive behavior ran unchecked.

  
  


“Get your disgusting hands off of my Clarke!”  She howled charging towards her cousin; red eyes glowed vibrantly as canines beamed with the morning sun.  With a vice-like grip, she tore Anya away from the blonde and tossed her over her shoulder.

  
  


Raven went to her alpha’s aid standing between them ready to fight back, but it was the gentle tug of arms wrapped around her waist that caught her attention,  “Please.  Anya didn’t mean any harm; she was just introducing herself to me.”  Clarke’s soft voice whimpered into Lexa’s back.

  
  


Glaring at the two,  “Get out.”  Lexa growled posturing in place.

  
  


Both left the room quickly closing the door behind them, but the alpha could smell them standing on the other side.  Possibly, they waited to ensure Clarke was safe.  

  
  


Withdrawing from her alpha, Clarke rolled back into her bed without another word and reverted to the lifeless doll she had become.  The pheromones radiating from the brunette overpowered Clarke’s, but Lexa’s keen nose was able to register the omega’s distress.  

  
  
  


“Why?”  She quivered the question under the welling hurt she was feeling, “Am I not allowed to be with you or have friends?  Why do you give me this gift and place me in hell?  What did I ever do to deserve this?  What did I do to you, to be hated so much?”  Curling into herself, she let out another sob feeling Lexa draw near.  “Don’t touch me.  Just leave me alone.”  

  
  


***

  
  


As much as Lexa wanted to speak with Clarke, she was finding it harder to as the blonde continued to shrink into herself and even lost interest in her friend’s company.  Raven never let that morning go and proceeded to hound the doctor about her territorial behavior.  Stress was building with no outlet leaving Lexa up at odd hours of the night, her steps wearing a hole in the carpet of her study.  Her fingers longed to feel the delicate silk of those beautiful locks, but with the possibility of pushing Clarke over the edge with her presence she for the first time felt helpless.  

  
  


Her mind would wander over the events changing the scenario wishing for different outcomes, if only she had opened herself up and told Clarke the truth maybe then things would be better.  She could feel her wolf chastising the juvenile behavior, denying herself from the simple truth.  When had an experimental project turned into something more?

  
  


Clarke’s refusal to use the pain medication and even with forceful attempts left Lexa at a loss. Was it because she did not trust the doctor to take care of her in such a state? Should she resort to restraining her beautiful creature?  Or should she cave and admit to the facts glaring in her logical mind?

  
  


She cleared her desk of all files and folders. Her emotions plagued her thoughts along with guilt.  If only she could have hated the man, the monster he was before the revelation of the truth buried deep inside her.  Bringing in Raven was a mistake, asking for Anya to help her was a disaster.  

  
  


“Please.”  The whimper was weak but easily picked up by the microphone in the room.  Lexa turned towards the screen her eyes searching for movement.  “I don’t want to be me anymore. I just don’t.”  A sob broke over the body, too much pain to move was all that was holding Clarke back from removing herself from the equation.

  
  


‘Does she know I can hear her?’  

  
  


“Why would you put me in this body and torment me with freedom just to slam me into another cage?  God, why are you so cruel?  What did I do to be hated so much? Fuck.”  She gasped slamming her fist down on the mattress.  “Fuck you.  Just fucking kill me now I don’t want to be this anymore.  I hate me. I have always hated me. I hate being me. I hate living. I hate breathing. Why am I even here? What's the point? WHAT IS THE FUCKING POINT OF MY EXISTENCE?!”  Thrashing in a tantrum against her bed, she aggravated her recovering body.

  
  


“No,”  Lexa whispered feeling herself cave to the emotions strangling her heart.  

  
  


Barely a moment past as the brunette found herself at the blonde’s door.  Her body tensed with the cries bleeding through the isolated room.  All she needed now was Anya and Raven to pop up and scold her for hesitating.  Sliding the key into the tumbler, she heard the sequential clicks disengaging the lock.  With a steeling breath, she pushed herself into the room.  Clarke’s eyes glowed through the vast dark space of the room; the blue was more silver than normal.  

  
  


Trembling steps carried the brunette closer to the prone blonde; her scent consumed Lexa’s mind drawing her closer.  “Can I lay with you?” Lexa bowed her head choosing to let the blonde dictate the encounter.

  
  


The shock of the question quieted her. Raising a quizzical brow, Clarke internally processed the words wondering why she had to give consent to such a simple thing.  “Do what you want.”  She rolled over onto her side trying to block out the image of the doctor.

  
  


She allowed the words to bounce off her shielded exterior, ‘No more running, hiding or lying.  I can’t lose her.’  Carefully she climbed into the bed, her mind already thinking about changes that needed to be made for the tiny space they shared.  Her arms expertly found their hold around the slender blonde and deftly drew the woman into her embrace.  Their bodies fit perfectly together, and the second she found the right position she felt Clarke relax into her hold.

  
  


“No more. Stop hurting yourself over me. You are mine. I will do right by you in every way possible. I have been following my head, not my heart. I am sorry Clarke for hurting you.  I am an idiot with a master’s degree.  You deserve much better than me. But, I am all I have to offer. Am I enough for you?” She whispered into golden silk threads.

  
  


“Don’t promise something you can’t keep.” Clark’s resisted what she heard. How could she trust Lexa’s kindness? Lexa’s pheromones licked at her soul. Clarke turned her head burying her nose underneath Lexa’s jawline.

  
  


“I can promise you my everything, heart, mind and soul. I am bearing my word as it is all I have ever had.  I--”  The doctor choked on her emotions, not knowing how to say what she felt. But, her alpha took over. The claiming scent marked the bed. Most alpha’s only released this scent while biting their true mate. Lexa’s alpha shielded her from the violence her body could not handle. The spicy musk encapsulated their bodies.

  
  


Lexa could feel Clarke’s lips curling into a smile.

  
  


“I love you too.” The blonde mumbled into her neck. “When you are ready to speak the words I will be here to listen.  No one else could love me the way you do.  You created me and saw me like no one else ever could. Thank you.  Not everyone could end up this lucky.”

  
  


Lexa kissed Clarke’s pale forehead. “I’m the lucky one. Don’t you ever forget that.”

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	14. An End and a Beginning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Suarez gets brought to a crime scene by a friend. Post-surgical CLEXA fluff.

The overcast skies blended in with the thick fog pervading the forest. Suarez’s nose crinkled as she scanned the area trying to identify the fetid stench saturating the wind.

####    
  


The uniformed officer pointed over her shoulder. “The jogger that reported the find is over there. He says that he goes on a morning run through these woods a few times a week, but he hasn’t been here since last Saturday. That’s ten days tops. Anyway, I will let him explain it to you. He’s got a weak stomach though. He lost his breakfast when he I first arrived on scene.”

####    
  


“Were you the first to arrive?”

####    
  


“Yes, ma’am. And, I got the others that arrived later to cordon off the area. As soon as I picked up the smell, and confirmed it was human, I called in for homicide. Detective Sellers told me to ask for you. I don’t know why?”  Suarez studied the patrolman.

####    
  


“Do you know where I can find Sellers?”  

####    
  


“No. But, she told me to keep you here. The radio call came in while you were still in the parking lot.” The officer looked apologetic and then looked down at shoes. Mud smeared his boots. “Warning. It rained last night so it’s rather mucky up in there.”

####    
  


“Teresa, you made it,” came a familiar voice from a short distance behind her.

####    
  


“Oh. Hey, Megan. Yeah. You said you needed my help on something, but you didn’t tell me that it would be over the river and through the woods. I didn’t dress for this.” Suarez lifted her low heeled dress shoes. 

####    
  


The dirty blonde detective shook her head and rolled her eyes. “I don’t know why you insist on girly footwear. Our jobs are too dirty for ‘dainty’ shoes.”

  
“Will you lay off. I’ve been listening to you complain about my footwear since the academy.”

####    
  


“And yet I’ve never been wrong about those not being appropriate at a crime scene.” 

####    
  


Hazel eyes met coffee. “You are always wrong.” Sellers opened the trunk of her car, unzipped a duffle bag and pulled out a pair of shoes.

####    
  


“Nope. You just refuse to acknowledge my awesomeness.” Suarez glared at her friend as she exchanged the well-worn Nikes for her black pumps. 

####    
  


“Thanks for the loan, but you do realize if you hadn’t requested my presence, my shoes would have been adequate.” The cocky grin on the dirty blonde’s face showed no remorse.

####    
  


She pointed toward the trees on the horizon. “Just follow me this way. The M.E. hasn’t made it out yet, but I know that you will find this interesting. Do you remember Tuesday when I dropped into your office for lunch?”

####    
  


As they neared where several officers had gathered, Sellers paused. “Can you tell me if I am right. Is this the blonde girl that was on your suspect board?”

####    
  


Sellers bent down and flipped the tarp back revealing a body that had fallen forward in death. Her head had turned to the side, though clouded eyes stared at the women. Distorted by death with purple hued bruises lining her cheeks and nose, Ontari’s blank eyes stunned Suarez.

“Damn. Yes, that’s Ontari Queen. She’s not exactly a suspect but she’s all kinds of shady. Can you tell me anything about this scene?”

####    
  


Sellers shrugged. “Not yet. But, once the techs and the M.E. have passed me something I will share it. Who knows? We may be working the same case.”

####    
  


Teresa’s head nod imperceptibly. “We always make a good team. But, I’ll warn you this one may be a political nightmare before it's over. There are people who we can hurt accidentally by running mouths in the wrong circle. Call me when you know something. It’s my turn for me to buy dinner anyway. I’ve been so swamped; when was the last time we met for dinner?”

####    
  


Sellers did not bother responding as she spotted the medical examiner arriving. “It doesn’t matter. I’ll catch up with you when I have news.”

####    
  


***

Clarke stretched. A hellish pain radiated from the pink and swollen skin of her sex, seeking relief she rested back on the bed hoping it would ease the aggravated area.

####    
  


“You know better than that. Here sit up a little, and I will prop you up.” Lexa, with a towel turban around her wet hair and her robe still untied leaving Clarke an excellent view of her lingerie, turned and gave Clarke a grin as she bent down to put an extra pillow behind the blonde’s head. “I know it’s only been a few days, but is the larger space helping?”

####    
  


Azure eyes twinkled. “No, but being in your space does.”

####    
  


“I told you before; it’s our space. I have to leave soon. Anya will be in to check on you periodically throughout the day. She’s working from home today. Is there anything else you need from me?” Lexa turned away and began working on her wet hair.

####    
  


“No. I’m not hungry yet. Do you want to help with this part or would you rather not see it?” Clark 

had her dilator in her hand.

####    
  


Lexa paled. “I will do whatever you want me to do. It’s not about what I do or don’t want to do; it’s what makes it easier for you. I’m not the one who had major surgery.”

####    
  


Embarrassedly she shrank low in her spot almost hiding her face from Lexa’s view, “Please?”  She barely spoke the word afraid to be rejected.

####    
  


Shaking her head with a smirk, she enjoyed the adorable behavior, “Clarke, I am not ever going to say no to you, especially over something this important.  Give me a moment to send a message to Anya. She’ll relay that I will be late.”  

####    
  


Returning to the bedroom without her robe, she plucked the mineral oil from the nightstand,  “We’ll work at your pace, okay?”  Clarke’s mind could care less about the question posed to her as she fixated on the sight before her.  “My eyes are up here.”  Snapping her fingers to draw the blonde’s attention,  “You’re drooling.”

“No, I’m not.”  Watching Lexa smile as she went to fetch a few items of comfort for the two, Clarke quickly swiped at her mouth finding no residue and frowned feeling caught in the butt end of a joke.

####    
  


“You’re too easy to fool, Clarkey.”  Lexa chuckled.  “Let’s scoot you forward.”  

####    
  


“Why?”

####    
  


“Just trust me.”

####    
  


With a skeptical brow raised Clarke began to move as Lexa assisted trying to ease her Omega into the right position.  Sliding in behind the blonde, she felt the subtle shudder and smelled a hint of arousal.  “Well I am glad that’s working properly, but it’s not going to happen until you are ready. Our first time needs to be perfect.”

####    
  


Whipping her head back to glare at the alpha,  “What are you talking about?”

####    
  


“Nothing important, at least not yet.”  She smirked.  “Focus on the task.”  Placing a book beside them within Clarke’s reach she held out her hand expectantly waiting for the dilator.

####    
  


“Be gentle with me?”  The blonde squeaked.

####    
  


“Always.”  Kissing the nape of her Omega’s neck, she took the instrument and lubricated it up until satisfied it was sufficient.  “Okay, lay back.”  She instructed cooly in a soft breath as her legs comfortably rested along Clarke’s.  It didn’t take much for her blonde to find the right position that worked for her.  Lost in her alpha’s scent and touch, she was entirely relaxed. Her body instantly warmed on contact with the supple breasts providing adequate support and comfort.  Though her loose gown shielded her from the soft perfection of Lexa’s skin, her mind tempted her with a vivid imagination that filled in the picture for her;  the delightful sensation it would be to have that body pressed against her skin.

####    
  


Struggling to maintain her composure and fighting her urge to take the blonde, Lexa began to retreat into the memories of the surgery the painful process of crafting the right fit for Clarke. This masterpiece took hours to create.  ‘Hours, for my Omega to feel complete.  Days, weeks, months, it’s going to be a long road ahead.’  She felt her wolf snorting its dismay, but both came to an agreement to wait; patience would be rewarded.

####    
  


“Mind putting a pillow between your legs?”  Clarke shyly asked.

####    
  


Awkward realization throbbed painfully from between the alpha’s thighs,  “Right.”  Jerking a pillow from the side, she delicately positioned it against her member with a frustrated sigh. Lexa thanked the gods that Clarke could not see the redness cascading over her face and chest.

####    
  


“And this is why you shouldn’t tease me. Now you get to suffer with me.”  It was Clarke’s turn to chuckle, but it didn’t last long as the blankets were torn from her exposing the gown  covered legs.  “Gods, please, I am sorry for the comment.”

####    
  


“Princess, I would never intentionally hurt or embarrass you.”  Resting her chin on Clarke’s shoulder, she emitted a calming scent.  “You are safe in my arm’s and my skillful hands.  Bite my arm. I can take it.”  Not waiting for the Omega to get the meaning, she guided the tip in slowly earning a choked growl of pain from her love.  Instinctively Clarke sunk her teeth deep into the flexed bicep dragging a groan from the alpha as she continued to slide the phallic object between the tender, burning skin. The sharp bruising stinging from the clenched teeth did little to slow the doctor’s process.  Slowly, carefully she sheathed the dilator deeper feeling the resistance grow along with the pained hiss from her partner.  “Bite harder, don’t stop until the pain subsides babe.”  She whispered through gritted teeth trying to push the last inch into blonde.  

####    
  


Once hitting the precise depth, she stopped and held the dilator in position,  “We are there, breathe, but don’t let go until it’s bearable.”  Lexa knew there would be nasty a bruise, but was content something would remind her Clarke was waiting for her at home.  Within a minute the beautiful blonde relaxed and shifted back into her comfortable position.  

####    
  


“Thank you. I wouldn’t be able to do this alone.”

####    
  


Kissing the back of her Omega’s head, she inhaled the pleasant scent,  “No one should ever have to do this alone. I am happy to be the one you trust to help you.”  Keeping her dominant hand in position, she wrapped the other around Clarke’s waist.  “Thank you, for putting up with me.”

####    
  


“No one else could love the idiot with a masters degree.”  She weakly giggled.  “Would you like me to read to you?”

####    
  


“Absolutely.  I grabbed something new.  Hopefully, you will like it.  The cover art looked cool.”

####    
  


“Of course you would go off the cover art.”  Shaking her head she reached for the book and opened to the first chapter, ‘ **Everyone my age remembers where they were and what they were doing when they first heard about the contest** …’     

####    
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think this particular story will end in chapter 20. But, I am leaving it open. Is this particular storyline something you would like to see continue or is this a one time universe? Please, let me know what you think.  
>  After I finish this. Then I am going to write the last 2 chapters of Prisoner 319 for ur_the_puppy because I just can't let that beautiful story go unfinished. Just can't. I may also finish off our SQ story that just needs the last chapter. But, if you notice how quickly this story came together I have listed enough to keep me busy for like 2 weeks, maybe.


	15. Oops

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sexytime issues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Many thanks to those who have commented. I am still leaning toward ending this soon but making it a series because the whole Nia situation doesn't have a real end on it. But, that will again be after all the aforementioned other things in the way.

  
  


“Mmmm. Raven, right there! Oh, God. YES!”

  
  


Anya’s loud cry ended the restful sleep she had accomplished in Lexa’s absence. Another loud moan reverberated through the wall further waking the sleeping blonde. With cognizance came the realization that her pillow no longer held the scent of her mate. The air grew thicker with the musk of the two lovers down the hall. Anya’s alpha teased her senses awakening needs that only Lexa could satiate. Clarke longed for the quiet solitude of the morning; instead, she listened to hardcore porn in scent-o-vision. “Fuck, are you serious?  IT’S BARELY 9 IN THE GODDAMN MORNING!” Clarke uselessly tossed a pillow at the door as the two continued their ‘bonding’.  All the while longing for Lexa. Her newly crafted sex was throbbing its presence and making demands for her alpha, overcoming the pain of recovery.  She wanted nothing more than to be burrowed deeply into her lover’s side, being soothed. Instead, she retreated beneath the pillows and pretended it was all in her mind. Her desire for Lexa to take her clawed beneath her skin.  

  
  


Anya’s scent mixed with Raven’s and crept under the door; it teased her nose, preventing any escape or peace she hoped to find.  “Fuck.  I get they are drawn to each other like magnets, but seriously where is their modesty or social etiquette?”  Painfully rolling onto her stomach, she growled her frustration into the mattress and shoved her nose where Lexa had slept seeking the source of her contentment.

  
  


“The experts said that the change in hormones should’ve changed my sex drive by now. Am I in that unlucky 1% that keeps the libido of a fourteen-year-old boy?” she asked herself out loud hoping the sound of her voice would make it less bothersome.

  
  


For the first time as a woman, her nether region engorged and wept its desire begging for her alpha. ‘Did Lexa try something different with me?  Is this another part to the experiment she was hopeful for?’  Gene Therapy was not something unbeknown to the medical research world as synthesizing Alpha chemical compounds were regularly used in perfecting the imperfect ‘Broods’ to ensure their dominance in society. 

  
  


Instinct drove her body. With its swollen pain, her hips rocking involuntarily into the plush material hoping for relief.  In the past, plowing her dick into begging flesh soothed her demons, but now she was at the mercy of something less simple than that.  “Fuck.”  

  
  


Reaching for the burner phone left on the nightstand, she flipped it open and pressed the call button.  “Clarke, what’s wrong?”  Lexa’s voice was soothing to her ears but did nothing to calm the painful need between her legs.

  
  


“Their smell is everywhere-- Hurting bad, fuck…”  She squeezed out through an aggravated moan.  

  
  


“Clarke there is a nasal suppressant in the nightstand drawer.  I need you to grab it, can you do that for me?”  

  
  


A brief pause and some shuffling played over the receiver, “Got it.”

  
  


“Good, I need you lay down on her your back with your head tilted as far back as possible to keep the suppressant from leaking out.  Okay?”

  
  


“How long am I gonna lay like this?”

  
  


“It won’t be long, you’ll know.  Now it’s gonna burn a little, but it will dull your sense of smell and relax you.”

  
  


“What’s in it?”

  
  


“It’s a compound I created, just trust me, okay?”

  
  


“I do.”

  
  


“Babe, put me on speaker and set the phone down beside you.”

  
  


“Can you hear me okay?”   Clarke’s panicky tone tore at her lover through the phone.

  
  


“Yes, now you will remove the cap and insert it into your nostrils. When you are ready, you will press the button on the bottom and inhale only through your nose for as long as you can.  Remember it will burn, but you can’t stop until the contents are empty.”

  
  


“I wish you were here to help me with this.”  She whimpered.

  
  


“I know. I am here with you though, and I will be there shortly.  I’m already making arrangements.  I need you to do this for me, just think of me holding you and I promise when it’s all over you’ll feel much better.”

  
  


“Okay, I am ready.”  Letting out a deep breath, she tensed grasping the sheets with her free hand and began the process.  For a split second her nose was filled with the scent of Lexa, her mind providing her with the feeling of her alpha’s arm’s around her.  Her body relaxed, and then the sting followed.  It started slowly but built into a raging inferno that felt like it melted the sensitive flesh in her sinus cavity. Fighting through the tears and pain, she continued until the vaporizer emptied.

  
  


For what felt like an eternity in hell, Clarke slowly found relief as her mind filled with a pleasant oasis.  The room around her evaporated, leaving behind the forest untouched by man.  Cool air wafted through the leaves as moist dirt and soft brush caressed her naked form.  Deep green eyes connected with hers a tender smile captured her alpha’s lips.  Tranquility, a high unlike any other took over and guided her to this place that felt like heaven.  Lexa was there holding her close against her warm exposed body, whispering poetic promises of undying affection.  Everything was perfect in this space that belongs to them.  “I won’t let anyone or thing hurt my princess.”  The words fluttered around her warming every inch of her body.  

  
  


“I love you, Lexa.”  In a blissful haze, the sentiment poured from her lips like a breath of sweet air.

  
  


Sighing her relief, “And, I love you, princess.”  She whispered before ending the call. Already on the freeway to return home, she wondered what her cousin and Raven were doing that caused this episode.  Their sex had been near constant, so it wasn’t a surprise.  But, something triggered this reaction. But, what?  Then, the truth dawned on her.  ‘Could it be that the two were in their rut and heat together? Friends with benefits, right?’ She had suspected their connection lay deeper than the two were willing to admit; the two were inseparable since day one and were going at it like it would be their last.

  
  


Anya had never had anyone serious in her life before now. Fuck buddies had been her norm. Anya avoided feelings as if they carried a disease.  Anya and Raven’s relationship wasn’t that at all; Anya’s demeanor changed when the cocky little beta entered her life. ‘I swear to fucking god I will murder them.’  They must be bonded mates, and they were most likely tied together somewhere in the house.  The thought angered and amused her. Anya would die of embarrassment when Lexa came home.

  
  


***

  
  


Nia Queen idly stared out the windows looking down at the world below. Light jazz played on the piano across the bar. She signaled her waiter for a refill as she waited for her companion. Long dirty blonde hair caught her eye as she glanced up from her watch.

  
  


“Nia, I’m so sorry for your loss. I can’t believe you want to meet so soon after…” Abby reached out and touched the somber woman’s wrist. “Is there anything I can do for you?”

  
  


Steel blue eyes evaluated Dr. Griffin slowly paying attention to detail, new lines around her eyes and mouth. “No. This is about what I am going to do for you. Our children were going to give us an alliance that would bind us through the DNA of our grandchildren. But, life has been cruel. I no longer have a daughter. You no longer have a son.”

  
  


Abby signaled the waiter for a drink. “We don’t know whether or not I have a son. For all we know, he is curled up with a needle in his arm waiting for his next dose of heroin.”

  
  


Nia finished her drink and set the tumbler down harder than necessary. “He’s not. Well, she’s not.” She paused and gave Abby a sad look. “I’m sorry to say that you no longer have a son; but, you have a daughter.”

  
  


Abby felt the woman, granted they had conspired together, assessing the damage she had inflicted. Joy at her pain alight behind the irises, she could feel the cold heart of the woman who should be mourning her child’s death instead relished in knowing the Griffin family dirty secret.

  
  


“I don’t know what Clark has been saying. He is a man. Ask any of the girls he slept with in the past few years as he’s decided to fuck his way through his twenties as he throws away any real future.”

  
  


Dr. Queen shook her head to the contrary. “No. I didn’t hear this from Clarke. I heard it from my daughter. She cared for yours as she convalesced after some of her surgeries. Last I heard from Ontari, the vaginoplasty should have happened two weeks ago. But, that is assuming nothing went wrong.”

  
  


Abby stood and pushed away from the table. “I don’t know what you have to gain by slandering Clark’s name like that. Don’t push me or I will push back. I have a son. He may be dead, but I have a son.” Anger burned as her eyes as she stormed out of the bar, ‘I wonder why Nia Queen chose to tell me lies like that but didn’t tell me where I could find Clark.

  
  


***

  
  


Nearly kicking in the front door, her nose was assaulted with the pungent stench of gratuitous sex.  Gasps and a sharp whimper directed her attention to the naked bodies tied together on the couch.  “Not my couch…”  Lexa whined briefly before the weak scent of Clarke weaved its way through the nauseating smells.  

  
  


Like a siren calling to her victim, the nearly undetectable scent slithered deep into her senses electrifying her skin and tugged deep in her gut.  “Clarke?”  Need took over her thoughts as she felt the tightness in her pants build a demanding pressure,  that started to edge more into pain.  

  
  


“Oh shit.  Dr. Woods!”  Raven twisted herself upwards as Anya remained out of sight.  “Earth to Lexa!”

  
  


Raven’s calls were muted by the blood pumping through her ears; desire consumed every millimeter of will she had.  The alpha inside roared to the forefront and fought for physical control.

  
  


Now it was Anya who popped up holding a pillow over her chest,  “Fuck, that’s not good.  I’ve never seen Lexa with a hard-on before.”  It was more of a curious statement than concern earning a sharp push from her mate.  “What, it’s true?”

  
  


Raven glared daggers at Anya, “Really, Lexa has never had a hard-on before?  I wonder why she has one now?”  Sarcastically speaking, she waited for the thick-headed alpha to process the situation playing out before them.

  
  


“Ah.”  Swallowing her understanding, she nodded.

  
  


“So glad you can join the class. Anya, can you tell me why this is a bad thing?”

  
  


Anya measured her beta’s mood before responding. As much as the understanding of the situation had occurred to Raven first, the sense of responsibility for this moment fell heavily on Anya’s shoulders.

  
  


“Clarke’s not in any condition to be handled by an inexperienced Alpha?”  Gesturing for Anya to continue her line of thought with a rolling twist of her hand, Raven sat wide eye with a hard-pressed line across her lips,  “And, Lexa isn’t thinking about that at all, and we being the only ones here to stop her are currently knotted together.”

  
  


“There ya go.” Guilt laced Raven’s response. “We’re supposed to be the ones helping here.”

  
  


“Man, that was hard to think about with my dick buried in you.”  She was impressed by her ability to think when her mind was distracted by sex.

  
  


Tilting her head in annoyance, the beta threatened to smack Anya.  “Right, we are knotted together, and Lexa is in a lust-filled haze.”  Acting like the sharpest tool in the shed she nodded her head like all of it didn’t go over her head.

  
  


“So what do you want me to do?  I can’t just wish this away.”  She pointed with her hands at her engorged dick.  

  
  


“Are all alpha’s this dense?” The beta snapped at her lover. “Those two need us. We care about them. So, yeah. I am going to kill you if you don’t figure something out.”  Growling she reached down between them and clenched her hand around the thick shaft earning a groan from her alpha’s lips.  “It’s been two hours; no one healthy should last this long.”

  
  


“Not my fault.”  She hissed through gritted teeth.

  
  
  


“IT IS NOW.”  Turning her attention away from the alpha, she caught Lexa’s form walking up the stairs.  “Fuck this.”  Snaking her hand beneath the pulsing member, she slipped a finger between the sweat-slick ass cheeks.  She didn’t wait for Anya to adjust to the intrusion as she pressed the digit knuckle deep into the tight hole.  “Don’t get the wrong impression. I am pissed at you.  This is merely a means to an end.”

  
  


“Fuck me.  Babe, this is god damn incredible.”  Anya breathed weakly as she went limp resting her head on Raven’s shoulder.  “That’s a nice way to end things.  I am not going to lie, but, fuck, we need to totally try that again.”

  
  


Lexa struggled to compose herself, but the smell enticed her as she drew nearer the door to her room.  

  
  


“She’s your cousin. You do it.”  Her eyes flicked back towards the two naked bodies standing at the landing.

  
  


“Don’t get in my way.”  The red-eyed alpha growled as she postured ready to shred them apart.

  
  


“Lexa, you aren’t thinking straight.  Sorry, for this.”  Anya stated aiming a gun at her chest.  A sharp pitched hiss of air was all the alpha heard before she found herself face flat on the floor.  “I think we should maybe open a window.”  

 

As if the idea hadn’t crossed her mind, Raven rolled her eyes, “Ya think?  Like all of them.  Grab your dead-weight cousin and put her in the operating room.  Gonna need to strap her down until I can get the suppressants from the lab.  And I swear to god, no more sex outside our room.  No way in hell are we going to havea  repeat tonight.”

  
  


“But babe, you were the one shaking your ass at me like it was dinner.  I am not the only one to blame here.”  

  
  


“Cousin, O.R. now.”  As sharp as her words were there was a slight embarrassed crack in her voice, but ensuring her alpha got the picture she again threatened to smack her.

  
  


“Yes, ma’am.”  She hurried over to the incapacitated doctor and effortlessly scooped her up.  Pausing beside her mate, she beamed a playful smirk,  “By the way, you are so hot when you are being bossy.”

  
  


“And you are cute when you’re trying to avoid my wrath.”  She deviously grinned tilting her head in silent warning.

  
  


“Right, I’ll take this thing to the place now.  Don’t kill me.”  Anya nearly tripped over her own feet trying to sprint out of the danger zone, but nonetheless scrambled away with Lexa strung over her shoulder.

  
  


“Fuck, Clarke’s gonna hate me.” 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


  
  



	16. Evidence and Answers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More on Ontari's death. A little insight into Lexa and Clarke.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all the kudos and comments. They have been appreciated. As you can tell with the chapter number, we are getting close to the end. This will not be wrapped up in a tight little bow as there is more story to be told, but not at this juncture. Obviously, a story talking about Clarke in her new life might be interesting to chase.

Aden impatiently adjusted his hospital gown as he sat quietly waiting for the detective to start her questions. They had moved to a secluded and unused off space. Suarez had not asked, but she suspected its purpose was to inform families of bad news.

  
  


“Aden, let’s start with the basics. What’s your last name, age and where are you from?”

  
  


The boy rolled his eyes but began speaking. “This is stupid. I have told you this before. Carter, 17, and here. I’ve no family. They stole me from the foster system.”

  
  


The detective met the boy’s tense face “What do you remember? How could someone steal you from foster care?”

  
  


Timid, yet proud, the boy shrugged his shoulders. The turned up eyebrows suggested annoyance. “Let me give you a hint. There are 5 of us in that room that belongs in the same group home. All of us had presented already. Everyone else had not. I bet even the police can do the math on that one. We’ve been missing for months. Why didn’t you know? Is it because the brilliant mastermind behind this plot is smarter than Lex Luthor? I think not. Is it because orphans don’t matter? Don’t bother answering. We both already know the truth here.”

  
  


Embarrassed by their lack of knowledge, but shocked by the truth. The detective sat quietly for a moment; she processed the information she had gleaned. “You are saying you were taken from the home itself?”

  
  


“Yeah. One night, our therapist, Dr. Queen took all of us to dinner to do a group session. That wasn’t unusual. But, I don’t remember a single thing once I bit into the lasagna.”

  
  


The detective’s facial expression gave little away. “Dr. Nia Queen was the home’s therapist?”

  
  


Aden’s sarcastic laugh annoyed her. “She’s the therapist for every foster kid in the city. She’s met with all of us. Chances are, every kid in the room knows her. I haven’t asked because most of the room is on a ventilator, but I can tell we are all the forgotten children that no one sees; no one wants us.”

  
  


Frank opened the door carrying a tray of drinks and some french fries. The boy’s face brightened. “Please tell me this came from outside the hospital. Those fries look fried, not baked. This healthy eating is killing my taste buds. Thanks.”

  
  


“Did you ever see Nia and Cage together?”

  
  


Aden closed his eyes a moment. “It’s foggy. But, she appeared every time they operated on me. I used to be a beta. Now, I’m not. I don’t know what else to say.”

  
  


Suarez eyed the boy. “So, what would make things better for you if the group home isn’t an answer?”

  
  


The boy shoved a few fries in his mouth and took a long swig out of his coke. “Do you know anyone who needs cheap labor? I think I could ask for emancipation. I am thinking there is no judge alive who would disagree with my feeling like I can do a better job taking care of me if my therapist from the state helped kidnap a bunch of other kids and me while in their care.”

  
  


The two detectives exchanged a look. The boy had a point.

  
  


***

  
  


Jolting awake, Lexa found herself immobilized with her wrists and ankles tethered.  Taking in the familiar sense of her surroundings, her wolf raged inside her.  “ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME!?  ANYA!”

  
  


Sliding into sight on the stool, she gave a weak smile,  “Hey cuz.  Good nap?”  Anya’s mischievous grin taunted the alpha. But, Lexa quieted the beast. Her cousin, dressed for the boardroom, sharpened her nails on an Emory board. Anya’s weak attempt at hiding her amusement did not help the alpha quiet.

  
  


“Untie me, or I am going to murder you,”  Lexa growled.

  
  


“Right and earn Rave’s wrath?  Nope, I will take my chances with you.  Besides, I can still kick your ass whether your tied or not. This is easier and less time-consuming.”  

  
  


“Goddamnit Anya, Clarke needs me.”  

  
  


With Lexa’s statement, Anya walked up to her cousin and bent down so that they were eye level.“Yes, she does, but she needs that heart of yours not the bulge in your pants.  You know I am right, as you were the one who finished up the last procedure knowing how long it would take for Clarke to recover fully.  That brain of yours is too distracted to see past your lust.  I am doing you both a favor by keeping you tied up.” 

  
  


Letting her cousin’s words sink in she relaxed into the padded table.  Anya walked to the far side of the room out of Lexa’s view. Clarke’s scent was nowhere to found leaving the Alpha alone with her emptiness.  “Is she okay?”

  
  


She listened to folders sliding off a table. “From what Raven said, she’s blissed out of her mind.  What sort of concoction is that and can I get some?”

  
  


“It works better on betas and omegas. I haven’t found the right mix for alphas yet.  Besides, that was tailored to Clarke’s needs.  I am glad it worked but worried how long it will last. Are you getting ready to leave?”

  
  


“Tailored to Clarke’s needs?  Mind elaborating a little for those that don’t read minds? One of the two of us needs to run the company. You aren’t fit to do it today.” Lexa stood holding a briefcase and keys in her hands.

  
  


“The second I found out I had an actual smell that wasn’t synthesized by the implants I played around with my emotions and captured the scents I produced.  The funny thing is, I injected the natural essence from Clarke’s glands directly into my own.  Nothing happened for months.  Then just like that my wolf woke up.”  Catching the glare from her cousin’s eyes, she knew judgment when she saw it.  “It’s not like the synthesized street crap.  It was pure Alphatest.  I didn’t need additional doses, just the one. The rest have been sitting in the fridge.  I didn’t want something that required multiple injections to keep it going and if that was going to be the case I was content looking elsewhere for answers.”

  
  


Anya’s alpha released anger from her pores. “Why do I get the feeling I am not going to like the answer to my next question?” The dirty blonde ran her fingers through her hair in frustration. “The more I learn about what you’ve been doing…You’ve tried this before, haven’t  you?”

  
  


Lexa turned her body trying to meet Anya’s eyes. “Yes, but it was a long time ago, and it didn’t take.  I couldn’t let  _ her _ do more than one procedure as it was incredibly painful.  No matter how much she insisted on helping me, I knew it was pointless. The damage was already done.  I took too much causing the gland to implode, rendering it useless.  The other one barely recovered, but she didn't care.  She just wanted to help me.”

  
  


“Lexa, you didn’t?  Costia let you do that?” Rage and disappointment in equal measure slithered through the room.

  
  


“She offered, she wanted me to be me and thought she could help me.  I was inexperienced and should have known better at the time, but I was so damn excited to try.  Costia’s death is my fault.”  

  
  


Anya sighed as a tinge of pity bloomed through her anger. “That isn’t entirely true. The M.E.’s notes from the time said it was a weak heart and an infection.” But then Anya’s shoulders tightened and her brow furrowed. “Damn it, Lexa, I can’t believe you would be that foolish, and you continue to be. It’s reckless and stupid: two things you are not.  Hell, I am still pissed about what you did to Clarke.  Where the fuck is your moral compass?  Do you not think before you do this shit?”  

  
  


Lexa’s alpha retracted far inside, intimidated and sad. “Anya, I know what I have done is wrong, but I am working to right those mistakes.  You have to see that. I did some of it out of arrogance, but some I did try to make things right.”

  
  


“I can’t do this right now. I just can’t.” Anya lifted her briefcase and gave a quick glance at the door leading further into the house. “Get yourself in control.” 

  
  


Walking into the room with an awkward look Raven could feel the tension between the two,  “Did I miss something?”

  
  


“Thank god.  You deal with her while I go to work, if I don't leave now I am going to bash her face in.”  Anya stated pushing past her mate,  “You are so fucking screwed up, Woods.”  She grumbled not lingering longer than a second to cast one last glare at her cousin. 

  
  


***

 

“Okay. Let me get this straight.” Suarez drops into her office chair; shock emanated from her features.

  
  


Sellers dropped a file folder in front of her. “It’s no bullshit. We can tie Cage to Ontari’s death directly by a finger.”

  
  


“Not a print. An actual finger?”

  
  


Sellers shrugged. “Sort of. It appears that he covered her mouth with his hand.”  

 

  
The latina detective’s eyebrow raised. “You can’t possibly be trying to make me believe that fingerprints were lifted from the dead woman’s face. That’s not possible. Both of us know it. Stop beating around the bush. Tell me, how do we know it was Cage?”

  
  


The homicide detective flipped opened the folder sitting on the desk revealing a stack of still shots. “This is how we know.” The photograph of a severed finger laid flat and taunting. “She bit it off. It was wedged in the back of her cheek like a baseball player chews Skoal. He killed her by shoving an ice pick through her spine, but she didn’t go down easy.”

  
  


The officers shared a disgusted look. 

  
  


“No matter what we can pin on him, Cage Wallace needs to be permanently out of society. If I can’t get him for slavery, kidnapping and torture maybe you will succeed with murder.”

  
  


Sellers sat down to face her friend. “You’ve noticed how all our requests to the D.A.’s office keep being unanswered too?”

  
  


Suarez faintly nodded her head. “Someone important either has dirt or deep pockets.”

  
  


***

 

“Lexa” Clarke cried out for her alpha again. Lying alone in the big bed the omega’s heart ached with loneliness. “Does she not want me anymore?”

  
  


Raven sat down on the bed and scooted into position next to her. “It’s the opposite. Her alpha’s hormones want you so badly that we are afraid what would happen if she came in the door. You are too delicate. She might tear your injured skin. She might fuck you until you bleed. She could kill you with sex. And, I mean that literally, not in a good way. If it were the good way, I would not be an obstacle. But, I have to ask, is this what you want? Are you suffering from Stockholm Syndrome?”

  
  


Clarke rolled her teary eyes at her friend. “No. I know she’s flawed, but she wants to be better for me. A lot of her mistakes she made for the right reasons. She wanted to save innocent women from being tortured by my alpha. The Queen’s exploited that. They also blackmailed her from experiments she and her dead lover conducted. Costia died. Lexa lives with guilt. Imagine what someone in their family could do with that kind of leverage.”

  
  


Clark drank the water Raven offered her and wiped her eyes. “I want to live and be loved. I want to be sober and valuable for her. I don’t want to be that monster anymore.”

  
  


The small doctor wrapped her hand around Clarke’s delicate wrist and squeezed lightly. “You never wanted to be a monster. Abby made you into one. You can’t blame yourself for that. It fucked with your head. But, you should have fought it more. You should have stayed sober. I didn’t lose only Finn in that accident. I lost you too.”


	17. Violations of Another Sort

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We learn more about Costia (teensy bit), Suarez proves her value, and Clarke has an extremely bad night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TRIGGER WARNING!!!! To large extent, this is the beginning of the climax of this story. As such, Clarke has a very bad night and it's told from more than one perspective.

Teresa Suarez splashed cold water on her face. Reading the medical examiner’s report on Ontari Queen had turned her stomach, something that hadn’t happened in a decade. To hide her embarrassment, she took refuge in the ladies room. Her eyes scanned her face in the mirror looking for any signs of weakness. ‘Did Frank know she had been ill or would he assume her coffee intake had bit her in the ass?’

  
  


“Boss.” Frank ignored the ladies room door and pushed his way in behind her. “I think I found something.” He laid the file on top of the sink. “Scar tissue resembling either a W or an M created by a serrated, curved blade cut three one-quarter-inch lines behind the left ear.” He read the highlighted sentence aloud.

 

  
The female detective felt her memory crackling. “We’ve seen that before. Why does this sound familiar?”

 

The two studied each other’s faces until “Costia Green” popped out of both mouths simultaneously. 

  
  


“Once her death dismissed. Dr. Wood’s had been investigated, but ultimately a weak heart valve had ended her life.”

  
  


Frank spat out his gum into the waste bin and ignored the irritated looks he received from an officer who entered a stall. “So, you think Woods left a mark on her victims?”

  
  


Teresa rolled her eyes. “Does Dr. Woods seem like the type to need to brand her work? No, this is something else. Let’s look at Green’s file. I think the scars are older meaning it’s before Wood’s care.” She held the door open for her partner. “You keep this up, and we’ll make you an honorary woman.”

  
  


Frank shuddered as he walked by her.

  
  
  


***

Slumped over in her executive armchair, Lexa rubbed her forehead in an attempt to soothe away the massive migraine she obtained from the suppressant.  No longer had she dared to try to read over her work emails as it was a fool’s errand encompassed with pain and aggravation.  She put her faith in Anya, knowing better than to doubt her cousin when it came to working.

  
  


The Alpha snorted her discontentment wondering if she should just call it a night and slip into the warm sheets beside her mate.  But guilt and fear plagued her mind.

  
  


_ A thin sheen of cold sweat covered her body; her heart rate was erratic as well as her breaths.  Jolting sharply to a sitting position her nostrils were consumed by eucalyptus and rosemary, with a hint of something she couldn’t register.  Green lidded eyes studied the sleeping form beside her, watching the measured breaths raise the petite chest.   _

  
  


_ Fixating on the pulse point along the blonde’s neck, she hesitated to move even with the unfamiliar growl urging her to in her head.  ‘Mine.’  Her nails chewed at the sheets hoping to tether herself, but the swollen, painful throb between her thighs demanded action.   _

  
  


_ Glancing down at the bedding resting across her lap she examined the tented fabric, confused by the image.  A millisecond later she flung herself out of bed and backed quickly away from the blonde.   Her Alpha raged inside as her newly formed member thrummed with need.  Awkwardly she fought to walk towards the bathroom feeling the appendage slap against her thighs.   _

  
  


_ The click of a latch sliding into place echoed against the silence of the night with gentle reassurance.  A sure flick of a switch had the room drown in bright white.  With a long cold shower and unpleasant thoughts, Lexa managed to kill her desire and find peace in abstinence. _

  
  


_ Then morning came without warning and feeling like a line had been crossed she scolded Clark for moving from his designated spot when she hadn’t bothered to wake him in his sleep.  Disgusted by her unwanted attachment to him she allowed Clark to punish himself with self-loathing; it was his sick alpha nature demanding to fuck, that stirred his dick.  ‘Just a pet, nothing more.’  She thought.  ‘He doesn’t deserve me to care for him as something more.’ _

  
  


Shaking her head free of the memory she was startled by a loud pop barely muffled through the thick walls.  “Clarke.”  She sprung into action thinking she had fallen or worse, but was surprised to see Detective Suarez standing near the open window with a limp Dr.Cage Wallace strewn over her mate’s body.  

  
  


***

  
  


Suarez blinked her eyes warding off sleep. Frank’s shift for watching over the Woods residence ended an hour ago. Moments like these remind her of why she normally gets the noobs to take the late shift, but Frank lost his edge in the wee hours of the morning. She trusted him with a lot, but this case meant that whoever had guard duty needed to be frosty and alert at any given time. This long shot, if it pans out, will provide one opportunity.

  
  


_ “Frank, it looks like Costia had been a patient at Mount Weather before she went to Woods for help.” _

  
  


_ “Which means that Cage might be cleaning up his old mistakes. Woods has crossed him with Costia, Ontari and now Griffin.” The fearful expression on her partner’s face matched her own. _

  
  


She tipped back the remnants of her coffee and hoped the caffeine could counteract her lack of sleep. A dark shadow moving along the far wall drew her attention. As she watched the figure scale the outside wall toward the master bedroom, the detective threw open the car door and sprinted to the side entrance of the house. Using the key Anya had provided, Suarez skipped steps ascending the spiral staircase to the landing.

  
  


High pitched keening cut through the darkened corridor. Clarke’s fear flooded the air. 

  
  


“Please, don’t hurt me.” Clarke pleaded.

  
  


“Any last words you fuckin’freak? After your dead, your mother will destroy Dr. Woods for ruining her chance. Her son should’ve been her ticket. You and Dr. Queen’s daughter should have produced beautiful children. Politically, those two women could have run the world. But, you had to be a fuck up, didn’t you?” he whispered between gritted teeth. He examined her barely clad body. Lust created a tent in his pants; his movements became more agitated.

  
  


Suarez approached the door with her H&K vp9 at the ready. Cage fisted Clarke’s hair drawing her head back.

  
  


“Open that pretty little mouth.”

  
  


He stepped over the terrified omega as she tried to fight him off. “Now now, that’s impolite Clark, you’re the bitch, and I am the man, open your fucking mouth, or I will make sure this hurts.” Smashing the butt of his pistol across her face he managed to gash the delicate skin before clasping her cheeks in a rough hold with the cold steel pressed into her skin.  “I don’t know if you are better as a slut or as a man whore, but damn Clark I wouldn’t mind fucking the shit out of you.  It's a compliment.”

  
  


As he moved to put the barrel down her throat, Suarez cleared her throat. Cage spun and lifted the gun toward the detective. Suarez fired instantly. “Freeze, asshole.”

  
  


The force of the bullet ripping into his torso knocked him down. His body weight pinned Clarke to the floor.

  
  


***

  
  


With her body tightly wrapped around Lexa’s body pillow, Clarke inhaled the scents barely present in the fabric.  Her skin burned with desire as her sex clenched with need.  Her mate had been absent for far too long, and now as minutes bled into hours of loneliness, she felt herself going mad.

  
  


Every sound that broke the silence had her sharp attention; disappointment quieted her hope.  No one had been in to see her since the early morning with Raven doing her rounds before heading to work.  A tray of food magically appeared at the foot of the bed, but no one seemed to accompany it.  A few bites in she swallowed her pills then went back to her sleep.

  
  


Lexa’s scent surrounded her from time to time, but never her physical presence.  Knowing her Alpha needed her as much as she did plagued her tired thoughts, but nothing could be done to soothe them.  She wanted nothing more than to have her mate beside her, but from what Raven had said it would be impossible without collateral damage.

  
  


_ Swimming in the scent of her beloved she ground down against the throbbing member that teased her swollen slick folds begging for release.  Her heart pounded in her chest as her body thrummed with desire craving to be filled with bliss.  Wandering over the details concocted by her mind she salivated in the images of Lexa’s impressive cock buried hilt deep inside her.  Her synthetic walls clamping around the thick shaft claiming every millimeter of hot pulsing skin as if her life depended on it.  ‘Please, I need to feel all of you.’ _

  
  


_ ‘Anymore and I will tear you in half.’  Her Alpha grunts. _

  
  


_ ‘Big assumptions from a cocky Alpha, I can take more.’  She purposefully goads pressing down onto the fleshy spike.  The tight walls barely swallowed the lengthy dick, a tinge of pain, pings vibrating up her body and halting her anxious movement. Need wells over forcing her hips down past the threshold driving her Alpha’s cock deeper inside until bottoming out.  She can feel the swelling of Lexa’s knot begin to form and jogs her hips faster into the pleasurable warmth, smacking the tip hard against the purest point of ecstasy as every muscle tenses with excitement bracing for an imaginable orgasm to rippled over every inch of her being. _

  
  


A metallic click ends the fantasy before it’s climax,  “What a fucking slut you have become Clark.  So much promise and yet all you turned out to be is a whore.”

  
  


“Any last words you fuckin’freak? After your dead, your mother will destroy Dr. Woods for ruining her chance. Her son should’ve been her ticket. You and Dr. Queen’s daughter should have produced beautiful children. Politically, those two women could have run the world. But, you had to be a fuck up, didn’t you?” his hot breath pushed tendrils over hair away from her neck baring more of her skin. She felt the heat from his eyes as he enjoyed her see-through nightie. 

 

He forced her to roll over onto her back. She met the dead eyes of a man she never knew,  “Please, don’t hurt me.”  She trembled.

  
  


“Oh I am not going to hurt you, you won’t feel a damn thing.”  His fingers fisted the silk locks tugging the former man up into a sitting position.  “Open that filthy mouth of yours and swallow my gun.  Can’t wait to blow my load into the back of your precious throat.”

  
  


Trying to turn away from her attacker she felt his grip tighten as his legs straddled her thighs,  “Now-now, that’s impolite Clark, you’re the bitch, and I am the man, open your fucking mouth, or I will make sure this hurts.” Smashing the butt of his pistol across her face he managed to gash the delicate skin before clasping her cheeks in a rough hold with the cold steel pressed into her skin.  “I don’t know if you are better as a slut or as a man whore, but damn Clark I wouldn’t mind fucking the shit out of you.  It's a compliment.”

  
  


“Please.”  She whined in his painful hold.

  
  


Running his tongue across her face he enjoyed the soft feel of her skin,  “You are definitely not a guy. Fuck I think you are better than Ontari.  It really is a shame I can’t feel what the good doctor has done to you, but thems the brakes.  Nia wants to punish her, and I don’t feel like dying.  You fucked up your best chances of having a place in this world. You know Ontari was a fantastic fuck right?”  Burying his nose into her golden locks, his hips absently ground into her,  “Fuck you smell so fucking good.  I hate to kill you, but god I have no choice.”  Drooling over the scent, he slammed the blonde back down onto her back and pressed the gun against her lips.

  
  


“Any last words bitch?”  He shined a toothy grin as his eyes went wide with a psychotic thrill.  Cocking the hammer back with a resounding click, he forced the pistol into her mouth tearing the surrounding skin and bruising the roof of her mouth with the small metal sight at the tip.  

  
  


Slamming her eyelids shut, she took in what she thought was her last breath and relaxed into the bed waiting for the numbness to completely consume her once more.  ‘I hope Lexa knows this wasn’t my choice. I’ve kept my promise. I won’t kill myself. I want to live for my alpha.’ She prayed for strength from whatever goddess listened. 

  
  


Three loud explosions of fire caused her to flinch against the metal before the man collapsed, he rested fully onto her dragging the gun free from her lips as he fell. The skin of her lips ripped and bruised as more of her delicate skin came into harsh contact.   __

  
  


An eternity passed before she heard her mate’s voice,  “Oh god, Clarke.  Baby, please be okay.”  Panicked footsteps sprinted to the bed as a strong arm flung the lifeless body off her.  Tear-filled green eyes beamed down at her as a soft hand caressed her cheek,  “Speak to me, baby.  Are you okay?”  Sure arms dragged her limp body up into a tight concerned hold as Lexa’s face buried into the crook of her neck.

  
  


“I missed you.”  She whimpered into a shuttering croak of tearful gasps.  

  
  
  
  
  


__

  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	18. Your Subtelties, They Strangle Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The aftermath of Cage's attack...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Note to self, never edit while drinking Theraflu. I keep finding small errors. It's annoying.

Suarez felt like a buzzard circling while she waited for the forensic technician to finish with Cage’s cell phone. The medical examiner busily assessed the body. She stood to the side and waited as the team went through all of the procedures. A lab tech had already taken possession of her sidearm. Time crawled by as she hoped they would finish before I.A. arrived. Once the investigation into her shooting started, whoever Cage worked with would gain a head start.

  


“Got it, detective.” The tech bounced on the balls of his feet in excitement. He had unlocked Cage’s phone only to have an ex-military aging officer stepped through the door. “I’m looking for Detective Suarez.”

  


She sighed. At least Hastings knew his job. He wouldn’t waste her night, but any advantage she could have gained, vanished in an instant.

  


***

  


Nia Queen closed her laptop and turned to her son. “Drop that in the boot of my car, please. I have a few phone calls to make before flying out.”

  


Roan rubbed the stubble on his chin. “Mother, shouldn’t we be preparing to leave together? With Cage’s death, they have his phone. It’s only a matter of hours before they arrest us.”

  


Regal as ever, she interlaced her fingers in her lap. “I appreciate that your source let us know about his demise. I already told you that your plane ticket is waiting for you at the terminal. All you have to do is pack a bag and get on the plane.”

  


He stood, throwing her laptop case and travel bag over his shoulder. “I don’t understand why we are traveling separately to the airport. Your flight leaves 15 minutes after mine does.”

  


Her wicked smile worried him. “If we go together it lessens our chances. We’ll meet up at the arranged location in Brazil.”

  


“Yet, you have friends in Peru and Argentina, not Brazil. I’m not that stupid mother.”

  


Angrily standing she leaned across her desk. “Your intelligence has never been at issue. Your trust on the other hand. Get moving. You are jeopardizing all of my plans by continuing to stand there like a fool. I need to make a few calls, and then I will be leaving. Now, drop those in the trunk and go. Everything you will need to meet me is in the red bag. Grab it out of the trunk when you drop those in there.”

  


Agitated, but knowing he couldn’t continue their argument, he turned and took his leave. As he exited the house, he turned on his earbud and listened to his mother’s phone call.

  


_“Your honor, it’s arranged. You can retrieve Roan from gate C3. He will have a red leather case with a USB detailing his dealings with Cage. Our names shouldn’t come up. Make sure that my son doesn’t get taken alive.”_

  


_“It’s been a pleasure. I wish our pursuits had managed to get further. Our operation ran for less than a year.”_

  


_“True. But, next time, we will do better. Won’t we, Judge?”_

  


_“I think you mean ambassador. My job change goes public Thursday. I am sure we will. I will meet you with my friends in Rio. I believe that my new appointment will make our plans run so much smoother and with fewer participants.”_

  


_“Agreed.”_

  


Roan growled as he opened the trunk. He picked up the red case as he had been directed. But, he kept her bags with him. He needed all the evidence he could get.

  


***

  


“Detective, we have someone downstairs that says she lives here, pretty insistent on being allowed entry.” Suarez ignored the shouted question. She continued talking the Internal Affairs officer through the shooting. She deemed keeping her badge and gun active to be far more important than any question from a uniform.

  


The officer yelled out her name again before she chose to respond.

  


“Seriously, can you just deal with her I am not done here.” She glanced at the older officer who scribbled away in his notebook. “Hastings, is there anything else you need from me? Apparently, the boys in blue are overwhelmed by a feisty latina doctor. If you’re done, I will see to getting her where she needs to be with as little site interruption as possible.”

  


The intensity of the room increased as another uniform ran into the bedroom. “Suarez. Seriously. She’s already got Frank in a headlock, and there is some concern she may hurt him.”

  


“Sounds like your partner needs you.  I’ll call you back if I need any more clarifications, thank you, Detective.  Good luck.”  Hastings was always a deadpan type, working with him over the years she learned to discern when he was teasing and when he was serious.  She got the feeling he was genuine but knew he would prefer less paperwork.

  


Sure enough, once she made it to the front entryway, she was greeted by the ridiculous sight of Dr. Reyes holding her linebacker of a partner in a headlock.  The woman was tiny compared to him, but she managed to overpower the guy and bring him to his knees.  “Hey, boss.”  He choked.

  


“What the hell is going on here?  Dr. Reyes, mind letting go of my partner?” Suarez fought the tired grin that wanted to take hold.

  


“Mind letting me into my home?”  Raven tightened her grip around the man’s neck causing an uncomfortable grunt to escape.

  


“If ya drop him, I may let you in, but if you don’t, I will have you arrested for assaulting a police officer.”

  


“Fine.”  Sharply releasing him she backed away with her hands up, the uniformed officers hesitated to move nearer to the irate latina.

  


“Frank, why don’t you get the boys sorted into a better perimeter and then find some coffee for us. Oh, and can you get the phone from Smith. He managed to break the code an hour ago, but I’ve been stuck with Hastings.” She turned to the others. “We’re going to be here for a long time. The forensics team has almost finished with the bedroom, but they still have to deal with the grounds and the car they found parked down the street. I need you to keep your eyes and ears sharp. This man did not work alone.”

  


***

  


The lights on the fifteenth floor glowed through the exterior windows. Woods BioMedical Industries held Roan’s only hope for escape. He picked the lock on the front entrance knowing that if the CEO or CFO stayed on campus the motion sensors would not be activated.

  


His need for stealth decreased the closer he creeps to the office. Roan hated knowing that his only hope rested with his enemy. Dread filled his head as he lifted his hand to the door to Dr. Wood’s office.

  


“Shit.”  Roan dropped to the floor as a glass vase smashed into the door behind him.

  


“What part of keeping your dirtbag family away from me and mine don’t you get?”  Anya’s anger boiled beneath the surface, but the scent permeating the air gave him no choice, but submit.

  


The man inched to his knees with his hands up, and neck turned to the side. “I wouldn’t be here if I weren’t desperate. I had hoped Lexa would be in, but since you are here, I will give you what I have. I know mom had set up an operation to create an endless supply of slaves to the those who could afford it. I know Lexa unwittingly helped a little. I know Cage volunteered. But, mom’s leaving the country and setting all of us up. I will give you everything I have that will help, but I want to live to see tomorrow. Mom’s plan has me catching a bullet at the airport.”

  


Anya looked down on the vile man and then pointed at a chair across the desk. “I’m listening, but understand; I will not save your ass. You’re not worth it. You proved that a long time ago. I am not hiring a lawyer or anything else.”

  


He lowered his head and nodded. “I know that. You know as well as I do that as soon as I am taken into custody, I am a dead man. I want to give you or Lexa the evidence to pass on to those detectives. They seem to understand mom’s grand plan.”

  


Anya nodded. “Okay. What’s in it for you?”

  


“Nothing. Revenge, maybe. When I exit this door, you won’t be seeing me again. I will be leaving the country but not the way mom expects. She thinks I don’t know where she’s going, but I do.  She and her friends are moving their operation to Argentina and then selling in Brazil. I’m going to destroy it for them, my way.”

  


Anya acquiesced. “Okay. Explain to me what we have and then leave.”

  


He dropped the red bag on the desk. “This bag she meant as a decoy. But, the other bag contains her laptop and her backup drive.”

  


***

  


“Don’t you dare touch her.”  Letting out a low, threatening growl halted the EMT’s attempt to examine her mate.  

  


“Dr. Woods, I am just trying to make sure she didn’t sustain any injuries.  I promise you I am only doing my job.”  The man assured her.

  


“I can handle that myself, thank you.”  Lexa restrained herself from pummeling him and waved him towards the door.  “Leave. You’re done.”

  


“Right.”  He knew better than to challenge the Alpha and hastily made his exit.

  


The blonde sat at the foot of the guest bed shivering, still covered in Cage’s blood.  Shortly after the danger had cleared, she went into shock.  That relieved smile at seeing Lexa, quickly vanished leaving her mind rattled with the violent memories of an hour or so ago.  She felt filthy, soaked in his stench. Though long since dried, the patch of skin on the side of her face was faintly cold with his saliva.  Desperate to be free from the disgusting sensation replaying in her head, she rubbed the backs of her fingers into the smooth flesh hoping the bruising burn of her knuckles would scrap the memory away.

  


“Clarke.”  Grabbing her wrist, Lexa pulled the woman into her lap drawing Clarke’s face into her neck.  “It’s okay. When everyone leaves, we will get you cleaned up.  Just hang in there a little longer.”

  


Silent tears soaked the doctor’s shirt; she could smell Dr. Wallace’s scent turning her stomach.  Her mate’s body continued to tremble in her arms, Lexa knew the thoughts swirling around in Clarke’s mind.  Again her blonde was shutting her out, and her silence provided no answers.  Tucking Clarke under her chin, she tightened her hold,  “Babe, I am not going anywhere.  What did he do?”

  


Cupping Lexa’s wrist, she drew her hand to the cheek and pressed it against the tainted skin then let go.  The brunette didn’t need an explanation as to what Clarke wanted without words, she knew.  Smelling the tips of her fingers, Cage’s pheromones tainted with arousal assaulted her nose. The thought of killing her, or her corpse excited him; Clarke in her shame assumed the blame for his reaction as if the fault lies with her.

  


“No Clarke, he was an obscene man that wanted to hurt you so he could hurt me.  This isn’t your fault it was mine.  He was a colleague of mine that I never liked and barely noticed.  My ignorance of him is how this happened in the first place.”  Pulling the blonde back, she looked her in the eyes,  “My fault.”  She whispered, caressing Clarke’s cheek.  

  


“Thank you.”  Breathing the words she nuzzled into Lexa’s palm.

  


“For what?”  Confused by the appreciation her mate expressed, she watched the misty blue eyes close as she lost herself in the smell of her Alpha.  “Oh.”  Realizing exactly what her wolf was doing, she felt the urge to finish.  She drew Clarke closer,  “Trust me?”  Removing her hand, she watched as Clarke’s silver eyes rolled open.

  


“Always.”  

  


Pressing her lips to Clarke’s cheek, she could barely smell the dead man’s scent as hers worked to remove it.  A long lick of her tongue dissolved his stench and ignited the blonde’s skin.  “Lexa.”  Moaning her name softly, she captured the Alpha’s lips with hers in a delicate kiss before pulling away not wanting to press for more.

  


“Clarke?”  Searching the blonde’s features for discomfort, she felt her blood begin to warm as the front of her pants tightened in excitement.

  


“Please?”  She whimpered leaning forward into another kiss that was welcomed by hungry lips.  Twisting around, she straddled Lexa’s lap feeling the hot bulge pressing into her core.  Instinctually, she ground against the member as the brunette thrust her tongue into Clarke’s mouth.  Breathing the same breath the two continued to escalate in their desire, Lexa’s rock hard dick pulsed with each roll of her Omega’s hips.

  


Desperate for air they briefly separated, meeting eyes, the alpha’s red eyes eclipsed Lexa's green irises. The thick scent of Clarke’s arousal intoxicated her sensibility as she flipped the blonde over onto her back.  Immediately searching for the Omega’s pulse point her lips teased the skin,  “I will mark you soon, but for now I want everyone to smell my scent all over you.  You’re mine, Clarke.  No one else can have you.”  A lustful growl rumbled from the back of her throat as she pressed her stiff cock roughly into the fabric covered center.    

  


Generating a pleasurable friction Clarke followed suit uttering her understanding in a soft yet pleased moan, “Yours.”  With her Alpha’s cock rubbing in a needy pace she felt  a slight tinge of pain that only briefly plagued her movements.  Losing herself to the strong smell of desire pouring from Lexa’s glands shielded her from the discomfort and wrapped her in bliss.  She could feel herself becoming wet, and while logical Clarke was MIA, there was some curiosity as to how that reaction was possible.  Swollen and aroused isn’t unheard of, but lubricant was always needed, right?  Throwing the thought from her mind, she dug her nails into her lover’s covered back.  Clarke didn’t want to be treated delicately; she wanted her first time to be unrestricted and messy.  No longer did she have to take the lead, she trusted her mate and wanted to enjoy everything given to her.  No more having to pretend to be something she was not. “Make me forget everything before you came into my life.”  She pleaded.

  


“No, you need those nights to treasure what you have now.”  Capturing Clarke’s soft lips in a passionate kiss, she tasted the blonde’s tongue and dominated their dance before raising herself up on her hands to look down at the perfect mess she created.  “Those nights are there for a reason, Clarke.  Their purpose is to give you perspective, that was then and this…”  Closing her eyes, she rolled her hips slowly, purposefully into Clarke’s cunt.  “This is now; your place, your purpose and every moment in your life prior brought you to me.  We are perfect together even though we are fucked up.  You fixed me as much as I fixed you, thank you, Clarke, for all the mistakes you made to find me.”

  


Surging forward, she stole Clarke’s breathtaking all she could before moving down to her neck and latching on to leave a reminder of this night.  Cage wouldn’t be allowed to cross the blonde’s mind, not when she looked at herself in the mirror it would be thoughts of her Alpha and not his perverted touch or sick threats.  Leaving a trail of gentle bites, Lexa tore at Clarke’s stained shirt exposing her craftsmanship; the supple breasts she created were perfect.  Capturing a hard peak between her teeth, she teased the other with fingers enjoying how sensitive they were.  Her ministrations elicited a gratifying moan from the blonde encouraging her to return to her frantic rhythm.  Her drenched warm sex begged to be free from the binding fabric as Lexa’s thick cock continued to tease her clit.  Barely enough pressure was gained, but somehow they were edging closer to a release neither had been privileged to.

  


As her mate continued to stimulate her breast with diligent attention, Clarke tried to speak her thoughts, “Please don’t stop...I… I don’t even know what to say.”

  


“I know, it’s new to me too.”   Pressing harder into Clark’s cunt, she imagined what it would be like to feel those slick hot walls constrict around her dick.  “You make me this hard.  Only you.”  

  


A click of an uninvited guest’s tongue barely registered in the background, but the familiar voice was enough to warrant some attention, “Really?  Would you say it’s got a Janka hardness of 5,060 lbf because if that dick isn’t as strong as ironwood, I will snap it in half with my fist.”  Reyes threatened from the doorway.

  


“Go away.”  Lexa growled as Clarke continued to grind into her as they drew closer to the edge of a climax.

  


“Fuck, she’s got a black belt in karate.”  Clarke’s statement was lacking significance as she moaned into Lexa’s shoulder.  “She breaks wood with her hands as a hobby.”  Her fingers laced through the brown locks as her nails scrapped along the Alpha’s scalp.

  


“Anya better keep her distance in the morning if she wants to keep her favorite part of herself,”  Lexa mumbled before biting into Clarke’s shoulder wishing the visitor to leave.

  


Instantly, she felt like a freight train slammed into her side knocking the air from her lungs.  “I would be more concerned about yourself than Anya’s morning wood.”  Grabbing Lexa’s hand she pulled it back into a rear wrist lock,  “Don’t you dare resist, Woods, I just put Frances in a headlock a few minutes ago without breaking a sweat.  Hardly a warm-up for me. You aren’t even going to put me through my paces.”

  


“Make her go away, Clarke.”  Letting out an annoyed whine the alpha looked down to her panting mate.  Her cock ached in absence of Clarke’s warmth.

  


“I think she means Frank?”  Clarke was still hazy and not registering what had just happened.  “Lexa don’t leave me; we are almost there.”

  


“Frank, whatever his name is, I am not in the mood to be messed with.  Clarke, will you please cover up?”  Heat flooded her cheeks as Raven turned to look elsewhere while keeping a firm grip on Lexa.

  


As sensibility leaked back into her mind she opened her eyes to see Raven holding her feisty mate,  “Oh, hi Rae, how are you?”  

  


“Great, thanks for asking.  Now then, clothes, pillow, blanket, I don’t care what you use, but for christ sake cover up before anyone else sees you like this.”  Struggling to keep Lexa restrained she pulled her wrist higher causing the Alpha to bend forward.  “I am going to dick punch you if you don’t settle down.”

  


“Raven let her go. She didn’t force herself on me.  I kinda did that to her.”

  


“You did what?” Glaring down at the blonde Reyes felt an awkward sense of deja-vu.  “Clarke, I thought you were better than that.  Well sorta, I mean I get wanting to be fucked, but you are asking for Lexa to hurt you?  I think?  Gawd, I think you do this shit on purpose to hurt my brain.  I don’t even know who to be mad at.”

  


“Can I have my wrist back, yet?”  Lexa strained through her clenched jaw.

  


“Right, sorry.”  She dropped Dr. Woods and scooted back feeling awful for misinterpreting the situation.  “Better?”

  


“Much, thank you.”  She growled twisting to grab the beta by the throat.  “I am going to murder you for interrupting me.”  Her glowing red eyes lacked humanity as she stepped off the bed carrying Reyes with her outstretched arm.  “How is it you always find some way of ruining my time?  Are you this stupid or just over protective?  Clarke is a grown woman and can make her own choices.  I am tired of being cock-blocked.”

  


“Well, cuz, welcome to real world.  Now you get to loathe all the letdowns the rest of us had to go through.”  Anya stated firing the taser at her cousin that quickly seized up from the powerful current flowing from the prongs.  “Do you know how many times you did the same to me?  Probably not, but it’s about time for some payback.”  Confident Lexa was neutralized for the time being she tossed the gun back to Suarez, “Thanks, Detective, always wanted to do that.”

  


After catching her breath, Raven walked over and kicked the limp Alpha in the side, “I almost felt guilty for you, prick.  Now for fuck sake will someone open a goddamn window before this idiot wakes up thinking there is going to be a round two?”

  


“Well, Dr. Sexy as Fuck, I am ready for round one, and it looks like you could let off some steam.”  Anya winked suggestively.

  


“Windows or I will bend you over my knee in front of everyone.”  She shot her mate a deadly serious look.

  


“Right, windows, unconscious dead-weight cousin, O.R.?”  She questioned the checklist in her head.

  


“I will give you a treat for reading my mind, but stand there a second longer, and I am stringing you up in the closet for 3 days this time and no bathroom breaks.”

  


“Going.”  Grabbing Lexa’s foot, she began dragging her cousin out of the room.  “I’ll take this now and be back in a few to air out the rooms.”

  


“I am not sure what I just witnessed, but uh it’s nice to see someone has a level head,”  Suarez said nervously.

  


“Trust me, the “Woods” family can be thick-headed at times, but I keep them all in check.  It’s what a beta does. Right?”  Reyes shrugged.

  


  

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	19. There's Comfort in the Panic

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We find out what Nia has planned and who she is partnered with in the grand scheme. Sellers and Suarez reveal more. Anya goes home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is nearing the end of this book. Please don't worry. After chapter 21 is published there will be a few week hiatus before we begin again.

_ Later the Same Evening _

  
  


**_Last call for boarding flight 1308 for Rio de Janeiro at Gate F6._ ** _ The loud speaker echoed through the near-empty terminal.  _

  
  


Dr. Queen stared down the concourse one more time by stepping onto the gateway. ‘Either Roan’s chosen a different path, or Jaha’s men took my son elsewhere in the airport.’ As the idea bubbles to the surface, her phone rang.

  
  


“Make it fast. I am boarding my flight.” She continued onto the plane and located her seat in first class. A steward motioned to her that she had 5 minutes remaining before she would have to end the call.

  
  


“Roan never checked in for his ticket. Either he’s flying under another name, or he isn’t here. We need to close this loop. Tell me; what do you think your son is doing?”

  
  


She removed her coat and adjusted her chair before checking her surroundings. No one cared what she was saying or to whom. “Listen. I have no idea what he’s doing. I gave him what you asked me to, and I told him how this was going to play out. Of course, I left off the little bit that would have made him unhappy. But, he didn’t need to know that you had men waiting. I delivered my end. Now, I suggest you deliver yours because he knows who you are. If he’s taken into custody, he will name anyone to save himself. So, your honor, this is the moment I tell you to clean up your mess.” The bite in her voice drew the attention of those around her. 

  
  


**_This is the Captain for flight 1308 for Rio de Janeiro. At this time I must ask all of you to put away all electronics until further notice. We are expecting turbulent air as a storm front has moved into our pathway…_ ** _ the captain’s voice continued as Nia cleared her throat. _

  
  


She lowered her voice to a quiet purr. “I must go now as the plane is disembarking. Good day.”

  
  


Nia placed her phone in airplane mode and dropped it into her lap. With her left hand, she rubbed the pressure points beside her nose. ‘Maybe I will get to keep my son after all.’ Part of her mind wanted to be pleased at his refusal to follow orders, but her son’s loyalty had always been enforced rather than freely given. “God, I hope Jaha ties up our loose ends.” Tipping her seat further back, she closed her eyes and willed her body to sleep.

  
  


***

  
  


Turning the corner onto their street, she stopped the car and wondered why police cars encircle the property. Anya gasped as she drove past the Medical Examiner’s herse and hoped that no one she cared about lay inside. After Roan left she had tried to touch base with anyone; not even Raven answered her calls.

  
  


The smell of Raven’s irritation in the air made the alpha howl deep in her chest as she parked in front of the house. An unending line of betas and alphas in uniform and plain clothes traipsed in and out of the house. Following her nose, she pushed through the throng growling at anyone who looked interested in thwarting her progress.

  
  


“Ms. Woods.”

  
  


“Detective.” The words came through gnashed teeth as her wolf paced in her head. Suarez’s downtrodden expression worried her until the woman’s features began to morph into her normal procedural mask.

  
  


“I. Uh. You can tone it down. Everyone is fine. Clarke’s had a tough night, but she’s okay. And, she had the worst of it. You can find them all in Lexa’s guest quarters to the back of the house.

  
  


Satisfied the wolf settled. “May I go back to them, or do I need clearance to walk through my home?” Irritation dripped from her words.

  
  


“Why don’t I guide you to them? It’ll lessen the hassle, and I can fill you in on what happened.”

  
  


Although familiar with the beta, the alpha balked at her ‘needed assistance.’ Without thinking her scent demanded submission. 

  
  


“Miss Woods, I apologize. I didn’t mean you couldn’t do it, but that it might be easier than to have to identify yourself every time you changed room. We have too many different units that do not work together often in the same locale. All the guys want to see who’s got the biggest dick. I just want to get my job done.’” Exasperation, fatigue, and distress showed in her tired eyes as she motioned to follow her.

 

Anya held out her hand in a placating gesture. “I get it. I do. But, I’ve had a rough night too. Sometime tomorrow when the dust has settled, can we meet unofficially off the record for coffee?” They turned the corner crossing through the back of the kitchen and down a long corridor.

  
  


“Should I ask why?”  The detective warily searched Wood’s face.

  
  


“Not if you expect an answer today.”

  
  


A wry smirk briefly flashed on Suarez’s face as she led them through the maze of officers. “I’ve always been told it would be the alphas I had to worry about dealing with, but of the two of you I think you are a whole lot saner and easier to reason with than Raven.” They turned another corner getting further away from the crowd.

  
  


Anya laughed in response. “Yeah, she kinda goes a little overboard now and again. What did she do this time?”

  
  


“I’ll say Frank isn’t going to be willing to get anywhere near her for a good long while.”

  
  


“Uh, huh. I will keep that in mind.” 

  
  


Suarez pulled a card out of her pocket and wrote a number on the back. “This is my cell number. Call or text whenever you are ready to share whatever you think I need to know.”

  
  


Anya gave her a quick nod before she turned down the guest wing, two uniformed officers stood nervously at the half-way mark shooting a concerned glance to each other before attempting to acknowledge the Detective and her company.  “Do I even want to know what’s going on down there?”  Suarez asked exhaustedly.

  
  


“She demanded us to let her through, threatened us if we didn't.”  One shakily spoke up.  “We heard what she did to Frank, and she promised if we refused entry she was going to make it  **impossible to ever have an erection again** .”  The other officer adjusted himself thinking they weren’t looking.

  
  


“That sounds like Raven to me.  Fun, she is in a mood.”  Anya licked her lips in anticipation. 

  
  


“I have a bad feeling about this,”  Suarez mumbled following the Alpha’s lead.  

  
  


***

 

Dropping the heavy weight onto the table, she quickly tethered her cousin’s limbs as she had once before.  Shaking her head dismissively of the thoughts about Roan and the chaos that consumed the house she gently tapped the unconscious alpha’s forehead.  “Always causing trouble.  Maybe with the comfort of Cage’s death, you’ll actually sleep.”  Closing the door behind her, she headed back toward the guest room sure that this time she would meet her calm beta and not the feisty one.

  
  


“I have a feeling things aren’t done yet.  Nia has skipped town, and we aren’t sure where she went.”  Suarez clicked her tongue.

  
  


“I would assume there is an answer somewhere, but right now I am hoping you and your men are done for the night.  I have plans, Detective.”  Raven said with a deadly serious look.

  
  


“I swear you are an alpha, pretending to be a beta.”

  
  


Shaking her head with a chuckle,  “Kinder words than I deserve.  Nope just a hot-headed beta with a leader complex, I think.” 

  
  


“Whatever you think you are, I wish there were more like you in the world.  Shit might get done.”  Returning a smile, she gave Raven a gentle pat.  “I’ll get the boys and others out of your hair for the night.  We’ll probably be back in the morning to finish processing the scene.  I’ll leave someone I trust to keep watch; they’ll be pretty much unnoticeable.”

  
  


“Procedure, I understand.  Thank you for your help.”  She cast the Detective an understanding nod then walked towards the hazy omega in the room.  Not wanting to linger in what she thought was a private moment, Suarez took her leave and bumped into Anya.

  
  


“I’ll give you a call soon, but we need to talk about my new lead for you.  It's imperative you have your schedule clear tomorrow afternoon.”  Anya’s grip was firmly clasped around the beta’s bicep leaving no room for negotiation.  

  
  


“Right, I’ll be back in the morning to make sure the scene is processed correctly, and when I get a breather, you and I can talk.”  

  
  


“Better be ready, there is much I have to share and if you think that things here take priority leave Lincoln to handle them.”

  
  


“How do you know Linc?”

  
  


“He’s my half-brother, from another father hence his last name being different.”

  
  


“You know I can’t let him be involved now that I know his relationship to you.”

  
  


“Only you know this detail, if you trust men that hold no ties to this family to watch over us, then fine.  But I assure you he is better at his job than anyone.  Definitely without deep pockets or dirt to sway his allegiance to his job.”  She narrowed her eyes ensuring the Detective understood the meaning behind her words.

  
  


“Tomorrow, then?”  Suarez moved out of the alpha’s personal space and freed her arm as she did.

  
  


“Right, goodnight Detective.”  She turned towards the guest room.  “Rae?  Clarke, you two okay in here?”  She asked gently stepping into the room.  Both were sitting at the edge of the bed, Clarke was looking far less of herself.

  
  


“Yeah, we’re fine.  Just calming down from tonight’s events.”  Raven spoke for the both of them.  “Is Lexa okay?”

  
  


“Oh she is snug in her bed, wouldn’t want to be anywhere near that atomic bomb when it goes off.  First official cock-block, in her alpha state….I remember mine.  My brother spent months on crutches, though he didn’t deserve it.” She teetered on a somber tone but then let out a soft chuckle as she delved deeper into memory. 

  
  


“Is there more to this story or are you done?”  Sarcastically asking Raven’s head tilted as she studied her counterpart.  

  
  


“Oh yeah there is! I stole his girl.” Pride filled her chest as she turned towards her mate.  “She wasn’t even interested in me until I got my first rut.  Lincoln hadn’t hit his yet, and he was being too delicate with her like she was a flower.  Poor thing just wanted to be dominated, and I didn’t have the heart to say no to her.”  Fondly thinking on the memory, she let out a soft, pleased sigh.  “Alpha on alpha sex is hot, both of us wanted to be on top, but ultimately she was all bark and no bite.  Then right when I was about to pound into her, he walked in and threw a bitch fit.  I broke his nose and shattered his fibia.”  She proudly stated pressing her thumb into the solid mass above her heart with emphasis.  “Can you imagine how impossible it is to break a healthy bone with teeth?  Should’ve broken a tooth, yet not a single one of these shiny pearls cracked.”

  
  


“Couldn’t imagine.”  Raven shook her head feigning interest and began to doubt her taste in partners, especially this one.

  
  


Clarke quietly added,  “It’s incredibly ridiculous, but plausible.”  Trying to sound impressed she fought back the giggle tickling her throat as she watched Reyes’s eyes burn holes in the alpha’s thick head.  “Don’t kill her just yet, she’s very entertaining, and I need it after tonight,”  Clarke whispered with a small chuckle.

  
  


“You’re not helping.  I swear to god, Griffin, I will end you right after I am done murdering her.”  Threatening the blonde between clenched teeth Raven continued to stare down the oblivious alpha.

  
  


“Riiight, you don’t like being the smart one in the relationship.  Get over yourself, as much as you are complaining about it we both know you love her.  Tough and smart, but dumb when it comes to being around you.”  Clarke knew her friend better than she knew herself and in a moment like this, she relished in the simple joys she had missed.

  
  


“Seriously, he was already three times my size at that point ,and I managed to drop him like he was nothing in an instant.  Poor Lincoln ended up with a permanent reminder while I hit legendary status that night.  I had girls lining up to get a taste of this big bad alpha.  He hates having to lie about the scar; it still carries a hint of my scent.”  Anya was now pacing as her mind replayed the events with complete disregard of her company.

  
  


“Welp, if it wasn’t clear before it certainly is now; this is how the Woods Clan like to use their swelling intelligence,”  Raven said face-palming.

  
  


“I don’t know how it’s even possible for anyone to contain so much smarts in such a tiny fleshy area.”  Clarke gave a teasing rub to her friend’s shoulder,  “You certainly know how to pick them.”

  
  


“I turn the brilliant ones into idiots.”  Grumbling the statement she sighed.

  
  


“And I date the idiot with a Ph.D.” Clarke smiled again.

 

Catching onto the subtext of the conversation Anya shot the two a glare,  “Raven didn’t pick me, we just ended up together.”  Well, she almost grasped it.  “It’s nice to have a mate that gets me.  Sees me for me.  Especially understands when all the blood rushes to the head between my thighs.”  Never mind, she saw through their dialogue and even gave a wink to Raven as if she knew all along what the two were whispering. 

  
  


“I am starting to believe fate has a funny way of torturing me.  Great to know that there is still a sense of humor somewhere out there in the universe.”   Raven rolled her eyes,  “Get some rest, Clarke, tomorrow isn’t going to be easy.”  Standing from the bed she walked over to the alpha,  “You’ll be lucky if I decide 3 days in the closet is enough punishment.”  Snatching Anya’s ear with a sharp tug of her fingers, she dragged the dirty blonde towards the door.  

  
  


“I love it when you are angry.”  Anya cooed into the grasp.

  
  


“And I love it when you play dumb, now shut that sexy mouth of yours before I tear your tongue out with my teeth.”

  
  
  


***

  
  


Sellers snorted, giggled and set her coffee down. “She did what?”

  
  


Suarez glared at her new partner. “I said she made me meet her down at Hotep’s Slammin’ Beans. Have you ever even been there? I’m glad I had my badge on the inside of my coat instead of out. I might not have made it out alive.”

  
  


“It couldn’t have been that bad. What? The big bad coffee poets scaring the detective with mean words.”  The affable detective looked at her very annoyed friend. 

  
  


“I went for a friendly cup of coffee. I left with a head full of hatred and more questions than I know how to handle.” Teresa ran her hands down her face, then sat laying her head in her palms. “So what do you think of this task force they’ve created?”

  
  


Megan weighed her words carefully. “I’m tired of dealing with death. Do you realize how rarely we find the killer? I have this opportunity to help those kids who are alive and maybe stop some really bad people from killing again. What’s not to like?”

  
  


“So why did you request me?”

  
  


“Why not you? We work well together. We’ve known each other forever. I trust you. You already have a good handle on the kids and a lot of the work already done. I’d be foolish to not ask for you.”

  
  


Teresa continued to awkwardly rub the fatigue from her eyes. “A year ago I asked you out, and you said you didn’t think we could work in a long term, day to day type of relationship. Other than consulting on a case or two, you’ve avoided more than a quick conversation since then. Pardon me for not being psyched your sudden change of heart. I know this is work and that wasn’t. But, it’s a lot of time spent in close quarters. Whatever reservations you had about me then shouldn’t be any different now. I haven’t changed. So, I will follow your lead, but I think you might want to rethink this. I think you might want to take a good look around. Find someone you think compatible. I am still me.” She pushed her tired body from the table turning to leave.

  
  


“Maybe I’ve regretted what I said for a year. Did you ever think of that?”

  
  


Detective Suarez’s sad eyes met Megan’s. “I’m not saying no. But, if you think this is going to be easy for me or if you are asking because you think you owe me, I would rather you didn’t.”

  
  


“No. They asked for a list of people I wanted on my team. I gave them one name. I told them that you and I would pick the team.” She reached across the table and pulled Teresa’s hand until she sat down again. “We were good friends with occasional benefits. I want at least to get back to where we were. If not, maybe something more. It’s going to take time. But, I want to show you that I’ve been working on me. I don’t have to run for the hills as soon as it gets serious.” 

  
  


For the first time that day, Teresa smiled. “Then, I guess my first report to you should be a full explanation of my talk with Anya.”

  
  


“Right, work first.  We’ll talk about the other stuff later.”  Megan said slightly defeated on the quick change in conversation.  “So do they slam those beans or is it just a load of crap they sell to get the hipsters in the door?”

  
  


“I am indifferent?”  Suarez shrugged the question unsure of her thoughts.

  
  



	20. The Motherlode

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anya passes evidence to Suarez. The detectives find a mountain of evidence. GOING TO POINT OUT TRIGGER WARNING. And, some humor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize that there is very little of the 100 characters in this chapter, but it was necessary for the plotline. Although this story is coming to a close, this chapter and next give you an idea of where we are heading to with the next one. Expect 21 to appear in a few days. Then, book 2 will take a few weeks to a month before it gets started.

Anya sat on the couch nursing her beer. Raven watched her from the kitchen for the moment. She enjoyed the silence. Their life from the moment until now had given her little time to appreciate the alpha’s beauty or her bone-deep integrity.

  
  


“What’s got your mind spinning, babe?”

  
  


The question startled the alpha. She nearly dropped her beer then turned to glare at her giggling mate. “I had a visit with the mighty po-po. I hope I’ve saved my cousin from herself. But, who knows? They will do with that what they have to do, but I don’t think Suarez is after Lexa in particular. Or, at least, I don’t think she is.”

  
  


“Hmmm.” Raven stalked her way over to her alpha and carefully straddled thin hips. “Detective Suarez is good people. I’ve patched her up on more than one occasion.” The alpha beneath her tensed. Her jaw tightened. The beta soothed her jealousy with patient fingers softly combing through long tresses. “You know in all the times I’ve been around her, Suarez hasn’t even once tried to ask me out, unlike nearly every other officer on the force. Stop being petulant. She’s our friend, not the enemy.”

  
  


Anya nodded. “She seemed like she could use some friends. The poetry got to her. She had the beaten dog look when I arrived.”

  
  


[ **_Sparks of a memory younger than noon_ ** ](https://genius.com/Sabrina-benaim-explaining-my-depression-to-my-mother-a-conversation-annotated#note-4770015)

[ **_I am standing beside her open casket_ ** ](https://genius.com/Sabrina-benaim-explaining-my-depression-to-my-mother-a-conversation-annotated#note-4770047)

[ **_It is the moment I learn every person I ever come to know will someday die_ ** ](https://genius.com/Sabrina-benaim-explaining-my-depression-to-my-mother-a-conversation-annotated#note-4770134)

[ **_Besides Mom, I'm not afraid of the dark, perhaps that's part of the problem_ ** ](https://genius.com/Sabrina-benaim-explaining-my-depression-to-my-mother-a-conversation-annotated#note-4757814)

[ **_Mom says, "I thought the problem was that you can't get out of bed"_ ** ](https://genius.com/Sabrina-benaim-explaining-my-depression-to-my-mother-a-conversation-annotated#note-4878011)

[ **_I can't, anxiety holds me a hostage inside of my house, inside of my head_ ** ](https://genius.com/Sabrina-benaim-explaining-my-depression-to-my-mother-a-conversation-annotated#note-4878061)

[ **_Mom says, "Where did anxiety come from?"_ ** ](https://genius.com/Sabrina-benaim-explaining-my-depression-to-my-mother-a-conversation-annotated#note-10607986)

[ **_Anxiety is the cousin visiting from out of town that depression felt obligated to invite to the party_ ** ](https://genius.com/Sabrina-benaim-explaining-my-depression-to-my-mother-a-conversation-annotated#note-4878105)

[ **_Mom, I am the party, only I am a party I don't want to be at_ ** ](https://genius.com/Sabrina-benaim-explaining-my-depression-to-my-mother-a-conversation-annotated#note-4878511)

[ **_Mom says, "Why don't you try going to actual parties, see your friends"_ ** ](https://genius.com/Sabrina-benaim-explaining-my-depression-to-my-mother-a-conversation-annotated#note-4878528)

[ **_Sure I make plans, I make plans but I don't want to go_ ** ](https://genius.com/Sabrina-benaim-explaining-my-depression-to-my-mother-a-conversation-annotated#note-4878578)

[**_I make plans because I know I should want to go; I know sometimes I would have wanted to go_**](https://genius.com/Sabrina-benaim-explaining-my-depression-to-my-mother-a-conversation-annotated#note-4878578) **_(Excerpt from “Explaining My Depression to My Mother: A Conversation” By Sabrina Benaim)_**

  
  


_ The poet with anger and anguish continues bearing her soul to the room leaving Suarez feeling like a voyeur of the worst kind. She pushed her coffee to the side and prayed the next poet’s words cut less. Spotting Anya entering the door, the detective threw her hand up in greeting. A frown tugs at her mouth against her will.  _

  
  


_ “How do you like the place?” Anya’s happy tone implied her own opinion. _

  
  


_ “Would you get offended if I let them open my veins, erect a hanging post and burn me in effigy in the parking lot?” her dour mood cast across the table troubling Anya. _

  
  


_ The statuesque beauty almost spoke, but stopped. Instead, she pulled a laptop case from her shoulder and sat it on her desk. “I needed a place we could talk where the walls don’t have ears, and where no one would think to keep tabs on us.” She paused and pushed a renegade curl back behind her ear.  _

  
  


_ “Last night while you saved Clarke, I worked in our offices, alone. Until I had an uninvited guest.” She placed a thumb drive on the table.  _

  
  


_ “This is the security feed from yesterday. It backs my story. There is no audio, but you will see him come and go from the building. Roan Queen brought me this and another one.” _

 

_ She paused. Anya’s eyes stormed and then calmed as he blew out a heavy breath. “The other he told me is false evidence. I have it and will give it to you, but he said it was created to set Lexa up to take the fall. My trust level isn’t high enough to just give it over. I need to be with you as you do whatever you need to with it. I considered destroying it. Then, hiding it, but what if real evidence is buried within the fake? What if the crazy bitch gets away forever because I didn’t trust you?” _

  
  


_ Suarez motioned for the waiter to bring them two beers to replace the coffee. “I appreciate that you are sharing this with me now, but I don’t understand why you didn’t give it over last night. It might have been more helpful then.” _

 

_   
_ _ “He said she had a flight out. I think she was gone by the time he sat in front of me. What you were doing last night was complicated enough without me adding fuel to that fire.  I’m fairly certain both mother and son are out of the country now.” _

  
  


_ Suarez nodded quietly. The current poet shouted his rage of inequity in the workplace. His beta status apparent as he complained about ignored authority and the perception of the mighty alpha. “This guy needs to meet your girl. Beta status, schmeta status. Authority is taken not given.” _

 

_ “That’s true enough. Most of the poets lack action. Words only get you so far in our world.  Though, I think Raven is in a category all her own.  Kinda like it that way.” _

  
  


_ *** _

 

“Clear.”

  
  


The megaphone screeched. The percussive wave rattled the doors while the officers hid behind their cars.

  
  


“Not enough nitroglycerin!   Give me like... another 5 minutes, I’m gonna try some of my homemade stuff!”  The loud shout was muffled by the distance, but the official with the megaphone turned a few shades white.

  
  


“Riiiight…”  Cringing at the thought of what another 5 minutes would mean, he turned back to the officers up on the hill as all the back-up inside the short tunnel evacuated in a panic. “Everyone move back another hundred feet.”  His voice whimpered with a crack over the megaphone.  Calmly he snuck out sight before booking it to the ditch on the other side of the road.  “For god sake, Elliot, make sure there is a damn building left when you’re done.”  Feedback hissed from the speaker as he tried his best to sound dignified.

  
  


“IT HAPPENED ONE TIME!  DARRYL!  ONE FUCKING TIME WITH C4!  DO YOU SEE ANY C4 HERE?!  NO!  SO SHUT THE HELL UP AND LET ME WORK, OR I AM GOING TO SLIP SOME OF THIS IN YOUR COFFEE AND MAKE YOU SHIT YOUR INTESTINES!”

 

“I thought you said he was the best demolitions guy we have.” Frank side-eyed Suarez.  “More like you hired Wile E Coyote, super genius.  Unhinged.  Are you sure we want to let this happen?”

  
  


“If you want Iris, then you call her.” Irritation laced every one of Suarez’s words.

  
  


“Uh, no crazy guy is fantastic.  Forget about my doubts Elliot seems like he has the situation handled.”  He went rigid and clenched his jaw shut.

  
  


“Speaking of bombs, how much longer until she pops out that pup of hers?”

  
  


“What’s today?”  His voice cracked.

  
  


“Thursday.” Suarez sized up her partner as his discomfort escalated.

  
  


“If I am lucky?  Maybe another week or less.  She looked about three times her size when I last saw her.”

  
  


“Last saw her?  Frank, when did you see your wife last?”  Her jaw clenched in agitation.

  
  


“Hmmm, good question.”  Actually trying to count back the days, he struggled to answer and began to squirm with his partner’s third-degree stare burning a hole in the side of his face.  “I’m thinking.”

  
  


“Frank!” Although she didn’t say it, ‘you are an asshole’ shined in her eyes.

  
  


“What?!  I haven’t slept this well in a long time and the few visits before then she threw the little rolly vital scan thingy at my head.”

  
  


“Jeez, you did the deed man.Fucking suck it up.” She turned away from him seething in sympathy for his wife.

  
  


“Oh no, you don’t know what that even means.  I will take my chances here where the probability of losing a limb is less than 90%.”

  
  


Giving him a good whack upside his head,  “She’s your wife.”  Scolding him over his lack of priorities, she almost felt bad for the guy.  She knew Iris was short-tempered before the pregnancy so to think things would improve was wishful thinking at best.  Maybe borrowing Darryl’s bomb suit would be a smart idea before visiting her after she had the baby. 

  
  


“Fine, you can have her.”  He flatly stated.

  
  


“No, no, she’s all yours.  You chose to sleep next to that ball of fury til death.  I am content with my single life.”

  
  


“Single life?  Oh look, your girlfriend is here.”  Pointing over her shoulder with deadpan features, he got the Detective to turn on her heels sharply.

  
  


“Fuck you, Frank.”  Frustration brimmed in her tone as she felt stupid for reacting to his misdirection.

  
  


“We’ll call it even.” Letting out a relieved chuckle he gave her a friendly smirk.

  
  


“It’s even then.”  She grumbled. “I wonder what the hold up is. Seller’s the one bringing the forensics team. I’m not even sure if she wants us in the building before they arrive.”

  
  


Frank’s smirk doesn’t go unnoticed. “You don’t want to piss off your future girlfriend.”

  
  


The megaphone squawked again. “Take two. BRACE!  I mean Clear!”

  
  


“We’re not. I mean. She’s not. Whatever, Frank. It’s her task force, her team, her call.”

  
  


BOOM! The large slab steel doors flew like kites landing on either side of Darryl who looked as if he just shit himself.  “Not funny, Elliot!”

  
  


“What it was a little funny!” The small man emerged from the smokey mess he created with a match hanging from lips.  A few small flames wicked from his messy hair.

  
  


Frank sniggered at his partner. “So whipped and you haven’t been laid yet.”

  
  


“Your hair is on fire.”  Darryl’s voice was trembling.

  
  


“So what?  I needed a haircut anyways.”  He calmly dusted himself off as Darryl sprinted over with the fire extinguisher.  “Fuck no!  Don’t you dare use that on me again.”  Holding out his hands to shield himself from the cold contents he jumped back and tried to escape the blast.

  
  


She scoffed at him. “Tapped that a loooooooooong time ago--so long ago you were still in grade school, so sex isn’t the issue. Deal with it, little boy. Now, the fair lady that owns our asses has arrived. Let’s find out the game plan because dying early is low on my list of things to do today.”

  
  


“Goddammit, Elliot would ya just hold still?!”  Squirting a few spurts at his partner, he managed to catch up with him quickly.

  
  


“FUCK! IT’S COLD!  I HATE YOU!”

  
  


“Well, I see that you have things properly managed here, glad I didn’t tell you to wait before I arrived or anything.”  It was Suarez’s turn to go rigid as she felt the dry tone from Sellers scrape down her spine.

  
  


Minutes later the forward teams of detectives entered in carrying maps, lanterns, and walkie-talkies.  Sellers commanded Frank and Suarez to the fifth floor lab without clarifying why verbally. Suarez swallowed the bile rising in her stomach. She had shared the laptop with Megan. The evidence it provided proved that the fifth-floor lab had been Dr. Queen and Wallace’s primary workspace in the facility a few years ago. But, what had they been doing there? Would it be as bad as the lab at Woods, Inc. or would it be worse?

 

  
“Let’s grab a few masks. I have a bad feeling about this one.”

  
  


Frank’s jovial attitude fell away the deeper into the building they traveled. Their broad-beamed flashlights showed little more than empty corridors, derelict office spaces and empty desks. The detective noticed a distinct lack of ventilation and stagnant air.

  
  


“Suarez, does that look like scorch marks?”

  
  


She touched the soot-stained wall following the damage to a door hanging loosely on its hinges. Upon pushing the door open, fetid air caused Frank to begin gagging.    
  
  
“I think it's time to use the masks, eh Frank?”

  
  


The pair donned their headgear and turned once again to the entrance to the lab. Pushing the door open for the second time, she braced the door and allowed her partner to step through only for the bright light to catch a strange blackened trail on the floor. Motioning with her beam, Frank led the way pointing his flashlight at the dirty tiles while she swept hers in an arc around the room.

  
  


“Oh, God.” Frank’s exclamation muffled from the mask rang loud and clear in the deafening silence. “Teresa, is that what I think it is?”

  
  


Stepping away from her partner, she crossed grey emptiness following the stain to its conclusion. The desiccated remains of a small figure screamed into the blackness. Claw marks gouged in the flooring showed the poor soul’s path.

  
  


“Where are the fucking legs?” 

  
  


In her horror, she had frozen staring at the empty eye sockets and unhinged jaw. Coming to her senses, she retraced the bloodstains on the far side of the entrance. The cages disappeared into the darkness. Disembodied fingers clutched around the bars enticing her to examine the cages. She tripped over a small canister lying prone as her mind calculated that the cages held more than a hundred lost souls, none of them adults.

  
  


The realization brought her to her knees, where she went to all fours trying to control the rebellion occurring within her stomach. The glow caught the edge of the rusted canister. 

  
  


“SHIT! Frank, whatever you do, don’t take off your mask. They used VX on them. I have no idea what the half-life is on that shit. Do you?”

  
  


***

 

Blue-hued halogen lights stood at twenty-foot intervals flooding the warehouse sized laboratory. Suarez sat on the edge of a plastic crate watching the men work.

 

“How are we doing?” Megan inquired sitting a comforting hand on her shoulder. 

  
  


Teresa glanced up to catch her eyes momentarily before flickering off to watch the team working. “I don’t understand how they could kill so many children like lab rats. I feel like those American soldiers the first time they came across a concentration camp. The best part of my day so far consisted of the demo team’s argument and then our lucky find down here. I love that Wallace and Queen believed that torching the place would destroy the files, but failed to realize that one of them had a brilliant assistant. Every file cabinet in this place is fireproof.”

  
  


Sellers rocked back on her heels with a smirk on her face. “Sometimes we forget to appreciate those who try to protect our best interests. We leave them out of the loop. We don’t tell them little things like that could affect the outcome.”

  
  


“That sounds like experience talking not extrapolation and conjecture.” 

  
  


Sellers shrugged her shoulders. “If they had told their assistants that they needed to destroy their records I doubt they would have failed to remind them of the safeguards put in place to protect the files. Hell, they destroyed all the desktops and their hard drives but forgot the server room next to the elevator shaft.” She cleared her throat. “If I had told you I had abandonment issues and PTSD instead of pushing you away, I might not be trying to find reasons to include myself in your life. I’d have my only place in it already.”

  
  


Teresa cleared her throat. “I guess that explains a lot.” She squeezed the hand still resting on her shoulder. “How long until we know what we have?”

  
  


“The case or us?”

  
  


The detective rolled her eyes. “The case you and I both know that if you want to give this a try. I would be a fool to say no.”

  
  


A bright grin crossed Sellers’s face. “I guess I will bug the guys about an ETA on getting this stuff to the forensics lab for us to get to work. Why don’t you call it a day?”

  
  


“I will. If you choose to show up with a pizza, I’m fairly sure I can locate the beer. Deal?”

  
  


“See you 7ish?” She flashed a grin before she walked away.

  
  
  
  
  
  



	21. The Stars Are Blind, My Love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clexa time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First, I want to thank all of the supporters that we had through writing this. We made the conscious decision to stop book 1 when Clarke's real life as herself had finally begun in her own eyes. The next story will follow all of the characters. A lot of explaining is left to be done, but not here. 
> 
> I am halfway through writing Chapter 9 of Prisoner 319. I will be finishing that story before I move on to our next one. I hate to say that you have to wait a few weeks, but nevertheless, it is true. Until next time, thank you all.

Lexa’s tired gait clicked on the hardwood floor as she entered from her garage. The heavenly scent of homemade fettuccine alfredo permeated the air. Exhausted, but happy she placed her briefcase next to the hall table and dropped her keys in the bowl. She crossed into the dining room to discover the lights down low. Lit but guttering candles surround the area on every available surface;  the table set for two with her finest china and silverware shimmers in the scant lighting. She followed her nose to the kitchen; two no longer steaming bowls waited on the countertop. If it weren’t for the pots still drying on the rack, Clarke had left no evidence to her preparations behind. The clock above the stove caught her eye. 10:43 pm

  
  


Lexa winced. She hoped Clarke understood. She texted that she would be late around 7, but then she didn’t know Clarke had prepared dinner or gone to this much trouble. ‘Tonight was going to be another quiet night at home like every other night. Right?’ She turned on her heel to head into the living room to search for Clarke, worried that her love felt rejected. But, Lexa expected to smell her distress yet the air remained clear.

  
  


Room to room she traveled until taking the stairs to their room. Clarke lay draped across the bed wearing a sheer nightgown that left little to the imagination. ‘Well seems Anya went shopping and still insists on this being my particular taste.’  While caught inside her thoughts she barely registered the blonde’s tired movements.  While she focused back on the sight before her, she realized why Anya held that belief. Against her will, her mouth watered at Pavlovian levels.  The thin material caressed her mate’s body in all the right ways as the moonlight cast barely enough light along Clarke’s body to reveal the supple outline of perfectly shaped breasts. 

  
  


Silently, she stood at the foot of the bed watching the measured breaths fill and empty the delicate chest.  Clarke’s choice in sleeping positions always interested the brunette; she wondered if the bachelor was used to an empty bed.  Lexa found that most nights she had to fight to get Clarke into the right spot in order for both to sleep contently on the same mattress. Most nights, her mate sprawled over as much of the surface possible in a dead sleep when she entered the room.  Tonight her mate’s actions changed; a few moments on her back, then she rolled onto her side and immediately her unconscious hands grabbed for Lexa’s pillow.

  
  


Still asleep, but desperate to cling to her alpha, Clarke hugged the pillow close to her body, curled around it, and pushed her nose into its surface.  Smiling to herself, Lexa kicked her shoes off and climbed onto the bed.  With great care, she scooted on her knees towards the sleeping blonde, as much as she wanted to wake her mate to apologize she was enjoying the candid moment.  Wrapping an arm around the petite waist, she drew the soft body close to her and pressed a sweet kiss against Clarke’s neck, a quiet and gentle apology she could live with for the time being.

  
  


Comfortable in the radiating warmth, she fell into sleep quickly only to be disturbed an hour later.  Wet heat teased her fingers stirring Lexa awake.  Instantly, her nose was filled with the blonde’s arousal washing out any sense or thought.  A sharp twitch in her cock sent a rush of blood to the member filling the small space in her dress slacks.  Her pelvis and the round cheeks of her mate trapped the growing bulge.

 

What started out as tentative teasing turned into desperate attention to detail.  The spongy digit traced along each joint of Lexa’s fingers before the tip of Clarke’s tongue massaged into the pads.  “You aren’t playing fair.”  The alpha whimpered.

  
  


With a long suck, she drew the digits free with a wet pop, “And, you are late.”  Clarke growled in a weak warning.  Canting her hips back into the alpha’s cock keeping a firm hold on Lexa’s hand,  “I cooked for you.  Made sure everything was perfect for our night.  I would have accepted a call informing me you were running late, but I didn’t even get that.”  The omega scolded.

  
  


Kissing the exposed flesh along Clarke’s slender shoulder, she dragged her teeth over the meat,  “I’m sorry, how can I make it up to you?”  The question came out as a seductively low suggestion.

  
  


“I doubt you can.”  Challenging her with a mean bite to the soaking digits, she felt the alpha tense behind her.

  
  


As the dull pain threatened to bruise the backs of her fingers, a trickle of cold surged up her arm and spread across the surface of Lexa’s skin.  Every minute hair raised from the electrifying sensation before being doused in a thrumming warmth.  “You are asking for it, mutt.”  The statement frothed with arousal as the alpha’s body pressed hard against Clarke’s, rubbing her cock between the crease of the blonde’s ass cheeks, she chewed into the delicious skin over the omega’s shoulder.

  
  


“Not asking.”   Breathing her response, she forced Lexa’s hand beneath her nightgown. She dictated the movements as she rubbed the fingers through her swollen folds.  Slick with want, she straightened the alpha’s index finger and dragged the digit through the mess before pressing the pad against her stiffened clit.  “Try to make it up to me, or you can sleep on the floor tonight.”  Letting out the last threat she could manage, she lifted her hips into the brunette’s palm before relaxing back into her mate.  “Your choice.”

  
  


‘Oh Clarke, even though you are mad at me you are still trying to give me more than I deserve.’  Taking a moment to appreciate the subtext, Lexa gently kissed the nape of her lover’s neck,  “Thank you.”  The whisper was so soft and out of place in the dialogue previously carried between the two.

  
  


Driving her hand under Clarke’s body to caress her lithe form she pulled the blonde closer capturing her breast in her hand.  Teasing the perked nipple beneath the silk gown, she palmed the flesh and kneaded into the heated mound. Clarke rewarded her pants and with a begging whine.  Lexa’s lips latched onto the omega’s neck, and her tongue tasted the salty yet sweet sheen of sweat.  Burying her covered member as deep she could, her other hand freed itself and explored the expertly crafted folds of flesh.  Dragging the slick mess over the skin, she rubbed the heel of palm into the throbbing bud eliciting a sharp moan from her partner.

  
  


Grinding hard into a rhythm her hand started, she felt the blonde jog her hips to keep pace. Both worked together in a lust filled synchrony until hitting a plateau that left them on the edge of satisfaction.  In a desperate attempt to encourage Lexa further, Clarke snaked a hand between them to grope the stiff mass building behind the smooth fabric.  Her fingers tightly traced the outline of her mate’s cock know it was a tease that would reward her in the end.  Squeezing along the shaft, she wondered how long it would take for her alpha to become annoyed by the confines and discard the trousers.

  
  


Grunting as she pressed into the blonde’s hold, she fought to gain more friction realizing it was a losing battle.  Frustration was rearing its ugly face as sweat soaked through her clothes with her movements, but hesitation kept her jammed in her business pants. Another tormenting grasp had her praying to any God or Goddess listening for an answer.  “Stop being delicate,”   her own personal goddess answered quickly, and on that note, she shifted back just enough to flick open her belt.  The brief pause left the blonde searching for her mate’s attention as she scooted into the warmth of the alpha making it difficult to finish the daunting task, “I don’t have telekinesis.  Give me a sec, jeez.”   

  
  


An impatient whine filled the air as Lexa removed her pants. “Can you take off the rest too? I want to feel all of you.” Clarke, tired of waiting, began undoing Lexa’s buttons kissing her way down the firm stomach as she went.

  
  


“I thought I was supposed to be making up for being late,” the alpha panted out. 

  
  
  


“From what you saw downstairs, what did you think I had planned?” The blonde’s smile held no anger or disappointment. “Next time, let me know how late you will be. This time we will eat after I have you.”

  
  


Her alpha growled. “omegas don’t get to make demands.” 

  
  


“You told me to tell me when I’m ready. I thought I had demonstrated it 2 days ago, but you’ve not touched me since Raven cock-blocked you. I need you, all of you.” Her omega stated her case without whining or begging. “I don’t want to manipulate you into this. I thought you wanted me as much as I want you.” 

  
  


Desperate silver eyes met the alpha’s a red glow,  “Clarke, I am going to show you just how badly I have wanted you since the moment I brought you into my bed.”  Licking a canine, Lexa’s hands sought out the silky fabric covering the blonde’s body tearing it deftly from the omega with less care.  Her mouth salivated in anticipation, the sight was vastly different from the man she had on her examination table.  Clarke was nothing like the man she once despised.  Fragile, yet not weak by any definition.

  
  


The expanse of flawless fair skin, along with petite features was everything she worked hard to create.  Not once did Lexa imagine this beauty would be hers, shamefully, it was all for a greater goal.  Short-sighted and corrupted by insidious partners, Clarke was so close to being lost to someone who would never understand the broken soul beneath the masculine vanity.  She needed to be seen by someone just as broken as her. 

  
  


Struggling with her pants, the alpha grew impatient and lunged forward capturing the plush skin encompassing her mate’s breast.  Devouring the soft flesh in a greedy bite, she lashed her tongue over the erect nipple.  A heady moan thrummed through the blonde’s throat as Lexa continued to twist the spongy digit around the pebbled skin.  Nails latched into the dense meat of Clarke’s back holding the blonde in place.  “Your pants are still on.”  Panting through another moan, the blonde wrapped her legs around her mate’s waist ensuring to leave a mess.

  
  


“Fine.”  A wet throaty statement yielded to the omega’s demands as Lexa thrust forward forcing Clarke onto her back.  Sloppy she kissed her way over to the neglected breast wrapping her lips around the mound as her hands worked the fabric past her hips tugging the boxers along with them.  The throbbing mess of flesh flopped free from the elastic band and settled over the sleek sex of her mate.  

  
  


The blonde gasped. “God, I’ve wanted you for so long.” Lexa ignored her words, scraping sharp teeth over sensitive flesh. The alpha’s hands found purchase on the silky skin of Clarke’s thighs before laying her full weight on top of her omega, shifting to her elbows. She united their mouths, Clarke moaned into the kiss. Delight trickled down Lexa’s spine. The alpha kissed the supple jawline. Clarke panted and writhed with every kiss and nip along her neck. The blonde stretched her head back and away offering complete submission. 

 

“What do you want, love?”

  
  


“Bite me. Make me yours.”

  
  


With a deep, devious chuckle, her red eyes shined down into the lidded glow from her mate’s,  “I’ve been carrying your mark since our first go with the dilator. I’m not sure you can handle my bite.”  She teased licking her lips, the dangerous smirk grew wide as she watched Clarke squirm in thought.  “I know I told you to bite as hard as you could, didn’t realize what I was asking you to do at the time. I carried an interesting smell into the meeting, regardless of how many layers of gauze Anya dressed around the area.”  Rubbing her cock along the blonde’s seeping slit, “I know you hurt that day and continued to until we got the right depth.”  Aligning the swollen tip s,he pressed just a little into the tight entrance provoking a grueling grasp from her omega.  

  
  


Tilting her hips towards the intrusion, Clarke fought her instinct to squirm away from the pain.  “Maybe if you can handle my dick, I might just return your bite.”  

  
  


Pressing slowly into the velvety heat, she stopped at an inch in depth feeling Clarke’s muscles greedily sucking on her cock, begging to taste her full length.  “Fuck.  You are still so tight; maybe we should stop here and pick up tomorrow.”  It was a teasing threat laced with words that should have been sincere.  

  
  


Talon-like nails buried deep into Lexa’s ass, keeping her captive.  “No?”  She voiced Clarke’s actions wanting to hear her omega beg.  Dipping her hips ever so slightly to push a millimeter deeper, she felt her mate’s thighs wrap around her in a clenching hold.  

  
  


“Don’t you dare. We are so goddamn close to having what we want without being interrupted.  I will rip it off if you decide to stop now.”  Clarke’s words sent a rush of need to the member doubling its size,  “I have gotten handy with getting myself off with the dilators, your dick will do just fine without you attached.”  It was a cruel but factual statement that had the alpha’s mind reeling with seductive imagines of her girl playing with herself.  Unconsciously, Lexa slipped further in feeling the soaking walls pulse around her dick wanting to squeeze every drop of desire from her.  “Slow or fast, I am game if you are capable.”  She smirked.

  
  


“As you wish, princess.”  The title rolled off the tip like a treasured taste as she drove her cock deeper almost fully sheathing herself inside the dripping core.  Grasping the slender hips, she dragged Clarke into the last inch of the fleshy spike and captured her mate’s verbose mouth in a dominating kiss.  She didn’t give her omega a chance to breathe before she pulled her hips back slipping nearly out.  The bulging head caught right at the lip feeling the inner walls constrict to hold her inside.

  
  


Lingering at the entrance, she continued to taste her mate’s mouth making sure to win the subtle dance of tongues before parting for a quick breath,  “No more words, Klarke.”  She clicked emphasizing the blonde’s name.  Darting down to the fleshy mound she sucked relentlessly on the omega’s breast before kissing up to the perfect spot to lay her claim.  Dragging her teeth at the beginning lip of cleavage, she bunched the flesh into a purposeful bite.  The placement was perfect, only they would know of its exact location while her scent would mark their bond, Clarke was hers, and no one would see evidence of their intimate moment.

  
  


Fingers buried in brown locks as her body rocked into her alpha’s, need guided each thrust taking more of Lexa’s cock inside her with each pass.  Pain called from the distance as pleasure consumed her.  Both worked into each other with blissful arrogance forsaking any consideration for her recovering sex.   Clenching suffocatingly tight around the width she felt the draw of her climax pulling her deeper into pleasure she had only dreamed about as the lump of flesh around Lexa’s burning cock swell.  “It’s okay, Lexa, please don’t stop.”  Her fingers squeezed into the firm ass keeping the brunette from pulling back.  “Knot me. I am as ready as I’ll ever be.”

  
  


Hesitation paused her thrusts as her dick twitch at Clarke’s word, spilling more lubricating want in an effort to slip deeper into the hot center.  Releasing her bite she looked up into fluorescent silver,  “Tell me, what exactly would you want your first time to be like with me?”  Husking the words out as best as she could pass the heavy fog of desire she focused on her mate’s needs.

  
  


“I never asked anyone that question, I-- I just did what I thought they wanted.”  Guilt plagued her thoughts as she studied the angry red glow of fire behind her alpha’s eyes.  “What do I ask for?”

  
  


Sensing the rhetorical tone, Lexa shook her head,  “A first that will define our start, but not dictate it.  Tonight is not an end, but a beginning, Klarke.”  Again, the way her name clicked from her alpha’s tongue like it was decadent treat to be savoured and not spoiled by ravenous hunger.

  
  


A single word rolled from her lips, “Cathartic.”  

  
  


With a sharp snort from her wolf had Lexa understanding the request,  shoving the side of her hand between the omega’s teeth,  “One more mark, bite and don’t stop until I am completely in.  Don’t refuse my request.” Warning the blonde, she edged forward onto knees gaining leverage as her free hand wrapped around the large base letting out a relieving moan. A slight shift had the swollen skin pressing painfully against the begging, but unforgiving tightness surrounded the drenched opening.  

  
  


Instinctively Clarke sunk her teeth into the slender meat, her jaw coiling with tension as it threatened to shatter the bones.  The pain drove Lexa past rational care; her hips bucked forward with her full weight tearing and stretching the burrow she spent hours creating.  Tears welled, but desire spilled over as the omega rocked forward into the pain until a filling sensation slipped inside easing away the sting with warmth pulsing from the thick intrusion.  Enraptured by the painful pleasure, she lost her fortitude and snapped the solid mass between her bite.  

  
  


Neither cared as lust consumed their thoughts. Lexa pulled back as far as the fleshy hold would allow before slamming back in.  Biting in the same spot, she drove a hard pace punishing every speck of the delicate surface.  Each thick wet slap pressed them towards a needed climax that had escaped them.  Feeling Clarke’s body tense in anticipation both moved in tandem feeling less give with each pass.  Throbbing along with each beat of her heart, she felt her cock reach its threshold of stimulation.  One final jab at her omega’s sensitive spot had the blonde unraveling and releasing her bite.  Moans filled the emptiness coaxing the alpha to follow suit as steaming hot rope laced into a mess within the small space.  The rumbling roar of satisfaction bounced off the large room’s walls leaving nothing but relaxing serenity in their wake.

  
  
***

 

“So, I think Lexa isn’t going to be murdering anyone anytime soon.”  Anya sat rigid in her bed with the phone wedged between her ear and shoulder.

  
  


“I swear to God, Clarke had better be okay or I am going to--”  Cutting of her mate’s words, she held the phone out allowing the speaker to pick up Clarke’s moans.  “You can turn the porn off!”  Embarrassment screamed over the speaker.

  
  


“I’ve got a room on hold at the Hilton, meet ya there after work?”  

  
  


“Fine. Bring the duffle bag.”  Raven relented with a weak sigh.

  
  
  


***

 

Wrapped around her alpha, Clarke purred contentedly. “So, I guess I should ask. What now?”

  
  


“Hmmm. I’m not sure I follow, princess. I’m yours. You are mine. What else is there?”

  
  


Reticence reeked from the omega’s pores. “Speak up. I can’t say yes or no if I don’t understand the question.”

  
  


Finding strength in the loving arms stroking her back, Clarke cleared her throat and whispered her wishes. “Am I still a prisoner in the house? Or, can I go with you to dinner or a museum? Can I go back to creating my art and find a gallery willing to sell it?”

  
  


Her alpha stilled. The quiet in the room grew. “What if you cross paths with your mother?”

  
  


The omega sighed. “I don’t know.”

  
  


“We can jump off that bridge when we come to it. For now, why don’t we limit your outings to with Raven, Anya or me? As time goes on and we are certain that you are safe, then you can go about as freely as you wish.” 

  
  


Clarke’s heart beat wildly in her chest. Finally, she could meet the world as herself.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	22. Not a chapter but I can tell you where one is...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We have started the next part of the story. We entitled it Chrysalis. I put a link below just in case you missed it.

We have started the next part of the story. We entitled it Chrysalis. I put a link below just in case you missed it.

 

http://archiveofourown.org/works/13567434


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